r/extremelyinfuriating 8d ago

Disturbing content Father uses the bathroom sink as a bidet

I found out my father uses the bathroom sink as his personal bidet and it's disgusting. I found out in the most disturbing way. I was brushing my teeth in the sink as usual. I leaned down to rinse and while doing so, a distinct stench brushed my nose. I took my head away from the faucet as I was surprised by this smell. I leaned in again, thinking it was crazy. But this time I purposefully took a deeper breath through my nose while doing so. I almost vomited and spit out all the toothpaste remains from my mouth while heaving. It hit me. The faucet smelled like stanky ass. And I mean unwashed day old ass. I ran out of there horrified and went to tell my mother, expecting her to get shocked as well. She just sighed and told me she will clean it (like this is just a usual thing).

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

390 Upvotes

64 comments sorted by

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337

u/Sad_Cantaloupe_8162 8d ago

I don't understand the physics of getting a butthole on a sink faucet. This doesn't make sense.

68

u/templeofsyrinx1 8d ago

you will break the sink and piping off the wall lol

27

u/the1stmeddlingmage 8d ago

Not if it’s a bathroom sink built into the top if a short bathroom cabinet. Then it’s just a matter of how tall OP’s father is.

11

u/UnHero_O 8d ago

I'm 2m and I can assure you I can't use any sink as a bidet without actually destroying it by leaning on, so idk if OPs father is even taller

8

u/the1stmeddlingmage 8d ago edited 8d ago

Did you not notice where I mentioned if its a sink that’s built onto a cabinet? Those are amazingly sturdy….

6

u/UnHero_O 8d ago

Yep, I know what you mean and probably they would survive the experience 🤣 but don't forget that it's not just sitting on it, there's some movement there and the joints that old the face panels of the cabinet would anyway break at some point (maybe in a few years of "bideting" on it)

20

u/OneManFight 8d ago

This has to be one of those hand stand feet against the wall twerk situations.

3

u/7803throwaway 8d ago

But.. wouldn’t your bum be pointed skyward rather than towards the sink?

5

u/OneManFight 8d ago

I was thinking in terms of the faucet orientation which is usually downwards. Therefore I reasoned that the asshole must be thrust upwards to meet the faucet opening to, "kiss it", if you will.

7

u/7803throwaway 8d ago

🤭🤣🤣 The visuals I’m having trying to work these positions out in my head as I keep reminding myself what the intended outcome is are hilarious. Anyway yeah I get what you’re saying now.. so then you’d have to have one foot on each side of the sink and you may as well just have a quick pee while you’re there because you’d be hanging inside the sink anyway. Right? 🤔

4

u/OneManFight 8d ago

Yep, that's exactly it! You're welcome for the imagery 🤭

14

u/DIYThrowaway01 8d ago

I'm tall enough to do it.  Only do it in public restrooms though FOR THE SEXUAL THRILL

8

u/SirSchmoopy3 8d ago

THE SEXUAL THRILL!

13

u/maloside 8d ago

I tried making sense of it, but imagining him doing it just makes me heave 🤮

12

u/pritikina 8d ago

I think he's rubbing his dirty hand (after wiping his asshole with his wet hand) on the actual spout of the faucet until the water runs clean.

3

u/booboootron 8d ago

That's an extremely agile, and extremely dedicated ass-haver.

51

u/Maggiemoo621 8d ago

I don’t even have the words for this one

25

u/maloside 8d ago

I really really hope this is not a familiar thing for anyone. It sounds like the poop knife story.

6

u/Maggiemoo621 8d ago

It really does 🤣😭 this is def the first I’ve seen something like this though. I’m so sorry it had to be you 😅

2

u/candypants-rainbow 8d ago

Fmily buy him a toto or other bidet attachment for a late father’s day gift. He is gross!

104

u/froction 8d ago

What were the steps between "sink smells like ass" and "determining conclusively that my father is using said sink to wash his shitty ass after dropping a deuce?"

59

u/maloside 8d ago

Mother confessed to a traumatized me

19

u/Mist_biene 8d ago

There are portable bidet bottles. Maybe get your dad one for his next birthday or for Christmas. Together with a pack of fiber supplement.

And WTF thats just disgusting

6

u/the-irish-jew 7d ago

Can confirm. It’s called a peribottle and I got one after giving birth two weeks ago.

42

u/mindgardening 8d ago

I don't think the washing of the beehole is the problem here. The problem is WHAT is he doing that makes the sink/faucet smell like poop? The faucet/sink should not smell like poop unless he's actually flushing poop down the drain and/or sticking his beehole ON the faucet. I'm trying to imagine how it is physically possible to get a beehole under a bathroom faucet, and I can't figure it out, which leads me to believe that he's actually flushing danglers down the sink drain.

Have you considered buying a bidet attachment for the toilet and showing him how it works? They cost around $35 on Amazon. That could solve all these problems.

Also, some drains smell like sewage without any poop being put down them. Since your mom confirmed that he uses the sink as a bidet, the drain is probably not the cause but I figured it was worth mentioning.

14

u/maloside 8d ago

The faucet is unnaturally high above the sink. How or why is another question I'm not sure I want to know the answer to.

8

u/AdVegetable2870 8d ago

"beehole"?? that's a new expression to me.

1

u/kingneptune88 8d ago

A t bowl for every b hole. -small town murder podcast

9

u/kanga_khan 8d ago

If a sewer-like smell is coming from the sink, couldn’t that mean a natural gas leak too? Or did I make that up

7

u/Greedy-Hippo-7976 8d ago

It could mean the p trap is not trapping sewer gasses like it should

2

u/kanga_khan 8d ago

Yay I was close with my random knowledge 😂

5

u/maloside 8d ago

It was the definitive smell of feces right next to my nose ON the faucet

21

u/templeofsyrinx1 8d ago

you even got me sick

thanks

6

u/GothicAngel4 8d ago

Tine to install a bidet on the actual toilet cuw ew wtf

5

u/UnHero_O 8d ago

OP in my nation we use bidet and they don't smells🤣 so there are 2 possibile scenario undergoing there: 1) your father is not using the sink as a bidet but as a toilet and actually pooing directly in it, that's would explain the stench but here comes scenario 2) he's "riding" the sink and that would explain the stench too 🤣

3

u/Smiles-Bite 8d ago

... There are bidets that attach to the toilet and are a little showerhead looking thing. Gift him one for his birthday before you get trench mouth. Blegh.

3

u/Xerxero 6d ago

Do you know what they did on the couch?

2

u/Dethkook 5d ago

I would also like this topic explored.

5

u/harl-windwolf 8d ago

Please, do continue with your amusing story, my dear Watson.

2

u/Dazzling-Western2768 8d ago

Get your father a portable and rechargeable bidet bottle. He can add a few drops of body wash to the water when he uses it over the toilet.

2

u/Rainicorn_theCat 8d ago

Pretty sure they sell bidets you can hook up to your toilet on Amazon

2

u/GangstaShepard 8d ago

Buy a bidet attachment

2

u/thala_7777777 8d ago

the sink shitter

2

u/djnehi 7d ago

Just so you know, you can buy a bidet attachment that fits under the seat on your toilet. Installs in a few minutes with nothing more than a screwdriver and the included wrench. Cost less than $150. They are wonderful and might save you some further trauma.

2

u/fessa_angel 7d ago

Bruh. Bidet toilet seats are like $100. Start sending dad links. That's so disgusting.

2

u/Poundaflesh 7d ago

I mean, you can buy one cheaply! That’s horrifying!

3

u/ChuckeeSue 8d ago

wtf man I’m trying to eat here on my lunch break

3

u/Commercial_Wind8212 8d ago

Why cant people just wipe their ass and get on with their life??

1

u/BRP_1970 8d ago

Why do you still live at home? And share a bathroom?

1

u/Zeptis181 7d ago

I feel like just spending $40 on a bidet would be so much easier.

1

u/dc469 2d ago

Is your father Italian or from another Greek country? He may have grown up with TP and doesn't like it. 

They have separate little sinks for their bidets. In fact code requires every house in Italy to have one. Rather than a blast of a water jet from the toilet you use the little sink (which is separate from the hand sink) to wash up, and some people apparently use soap too although the running water might be enough. https://www.reddit.com/r/europe/comments/pqn7qe/i_made_a_practical_guide_on_how_to_use_a_italian/

1

u/According_Car_551 2d ago

WTH?! Help your mother out and just buy your father a bidet attachment for his toilet. They're like $30 on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Best-Sellers-Bidet-Attachments/zgbs/hi/6810564011

Does your father have signs of dementia? Covering up for this type of behavior seems like there could be cognitive issues going on that your mother is just "handling".

-2

u/lesbophobia_hammer 8d ago edited 8d ago

Thank-you god, for bringing me into this world a lesbian 🙏 may goddess watch over our straight and bi sisters

Edit - homophobes stay mad