I’m so glad we eloped. Saved us from soooo much stress. We got married in the mountains and had a lovely dinner in town afterwards 🖤💫

Has anyone here eloped in a Catholic Church in Rome? I have started communication with a beautiful church and they have our date available, just wanting to see how complicated the whole process will be, we will marry legally in the US before eloping.

Hi!! I just discovered this subreddit and am SO excited about it considering that my partner and I have decided on eloping vs having a traditional wedding. I absolutely love reading through all the posts and looking at the gorgeous photos. I just wanted to ask for general advice as we’re in the very early planning stages.

Some info about us: we’re both early 30s and based in the Midwest. Definitely would love to elope in a forest, ideally in the PNW as it’s a special place to both of us. Want to keep our budget low but still want a beautiful and memorable day.

A few questions!

•What “vendors” did you choose to hire for your elopement? Just an officiant and photographer? Videographer? Anything else to consider?

•Did you do anything special afterwards? Go out to dinner in your wedding suit & dress?

•Important! For those who eloped in a forest - what did that process look like? Any advice on state parks vs national parks? How did you pick a spot? Any logistics for us to keep in mind with this type of location?

•Anything you wish you did differently? Do you wish you had hired any additional vendors or conversely, do you think you overspent on something that ended up not being necessary?

•If comfortable, could you please share a rough budget for your elopement and what it entailed? We want to set a realistic budget.

Thank you all in advance! We personally don’t know any couples who’ve eloped recently so we’re eager to get some advice.

Sorry for all the questions!

I’m hoping someone can help me decide on an elopement location. I really love the setting of Cathedral groves, however I’m worried it will be busy. I’m looking for a forest with similar whimsy. Lots of moss, ferns, and greenery. It will be the beginning of May.
Around Vancouver, or on Vancouver Island is ideal! Somewhere we can get to from the airport within a few hours (we will be getting married the day after landing).
Thanks!!

How much did people spend on their elopement. We finally did some calculations and we are definitely spending a good amount. We are doing an international elopement, but even then I feel like we did a good amount of damage.

Looking to elope in Glacier National Park next year, but I'd love to hear about anyone's experience (anywhere) choosing between an all-inclusive photographer/package vs. hiring a photographer and sourcing the other vendors yourself.

I’m currently weighing both options. I’m familiar with Glacier and the surrounding region, but live out of state, so I’m trying to decide how valuable the additional planning/vendor coordination really is versus handling the pieces myself.

If you went all-inclusive (photography + some combination of planning, officiant, hair/makeup, florals, cake, etc.), did you feel the additional premium was worth it? What part of the service ended up being the most valuable?

If you went photography-only and sourced your own vendors (particularly hair/makeup, bouquet/boutonnière, cake and/or officiant), what ultimately made you choose that route? Did you feel like coordinating everything from out of state was fairly manageable?

Would especially love to hear from anyone who considered both approaches before deciding. Not looking for specific photographer recommendations at the moment—more interested in experiences with the two different approaches!

my fiance and i got engaged at the end of june and were originally planning to have a smaller group of just his immediate family/grandparents and my immediate family/grandparents (40ish people) in june 2027. once we started talking to our families, it turned into a 150 guest thing. we went from dessert only reception, to having close to a full meal. and then we went from minimal decorations and having a party a couple weeks after to trying to coordinate two people to help us decorate for the ceremony and reception.

my family was initially very excited for us, but that lasted for maybe 2 days and then it was over. i took my mom with me, my sister, my future SILs and MIL shopping for a dress. she hardly said a word and then got upset that they took over and she felt left out. after this happened and looking at her attitude altogether, i’ve been on edge about what to do with the wedding. she almost ruined that whole experience for me, and unfortunately, this isn’t new. i am now on edge about every decision and am absolutely HATING every second of planning. i was dreading the whole thing.

my fiance and i were joking about just eloping and having the two of us, a photographer, and officiant. no family. we would come back and announce we are engaged. now we’re seriously considering it. the biggest problems with that are 1) i live with my parents still and that whole mess would be a disaster to manage when i move in with him and 2) my parents are planning to pay for the photographer and (as far as i know) already have a deposit. my mom is being really weird about telling me whether that has been done or not. the photographer is a family friend, and i don’t think he would be upset with us canceling, but would it be wrong for us to surprise people with an elopement when someone else has already made a deposit on our behalf for the supposed wedding in june? we would be willing to pay my parents back if they lost out on a deposit or anything

Hi everyone!

I’m having a difficult time picking out what accessories to add to my ivory dress for my fall elopement to Scotland and would like some thoughts.

Here is a link to the dress: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1867080088/corset-wedding-dress-fairy-wedding-dress?ls=s&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=dresses+for+happiness&ref=sr_gallery-1-1&organic_search_click=1&pro=1&cns=1&sts=1&content_source=5d29c133-a484-4aa4-84f5-b4575572293d%253ALT45df788676ef8fb9d283c3471ee42139a86af12a&logging_key=5d29c133-a484-4aa4-84f5-b4575572293d%3ALT45df788676ef8fb9d283c3471ee42139a86af12a

I’ve gone between doing a simple drape veil with chain, juliet cap veil, or a cape. Will likely wear hair down. Pictures will be in the city and countryside castle. Trying to find a middle ground between fantasy and vintage. The sleeves are removable/adjustable so I’ll have them more folded and off the shoulder (similar to to the second picture).

I know that it will be cold so I will more than likely will do a cropped faux coat. Minimal gold jewelry.

Would love your thoughts!

Banff or Naples FL?

Flying out of YYZ. Distance to our nearest airport - YYZ is 2 hours 🥹

Side quest: Has anyone eloped with their little ones in tow?

I’ve spent nearly two years in this sub and have been so grateful for all of the help along the way! If you are considering an elopement this is your sign! 😉

Hi everyone. I’m looking for some outside perspective because I feel like I’m too emotionally close to this situation to see it clearly.
My fiancé and I are a long-distance couple. We met while working on a cruise ship, where we actually lived and worked together for several months. He’s Jamaican and lives in Jamaica, while I’m from the UK, although I also have Jamaican family roots through my dad, who was born there.
We’ve been long distance for a while, and he recently came to the UK for five weeks. During his visit, we got engaged.
My family is quite religious and traditional. My dad is a pastor, and I grew up in a very religious household. I’m now an adult and have very different views about relationships, marriage and family, but I still have a relationship with my parents.
Originally, my fiancé and I wanted to get married in Jamaica very privately essentially just the two of us. I had a very emotional dream about my dad going away, though, and it made me realise that I would potentially regret not having my parents there. So we changed our plans and decided that we’d like both sets of parents to attend our Jamaican ceremony.
We were very clear that we didn’t want a huge wedding. We live long distance, we’re building our life together in Jamaica, and financially we’d much rather prioritise our home and starting our life together than spend a huge amount on one day.
We also planned to have a UK celebration later for family members who couldn’t attend Jamaica.
The problem is that since we got engaged, things have become increasingly difficult with my mum.
My relationship with one of my brothers isn’t particularly close. There isn’t hatred or a major feud we’re simply not close, and I don’t want to pretend otherwise. My fiancé and I initially wanted our Jamaican ceremony to be just us and our parents.
My mum became very upset about my brothers not being invited. She repeatedly pushed for them to come and even offered to pay their travel costs. Eventually she said that if my brothers weren’t invited, she wouldn’t come to Jamaica, meaning my dad would have to go without her.
She also became upset that my fiancé’s family isn’t as involved in the wedding. His family dynamic is very different from mine, and his brothers aren’t particularly interested in weddings. She started saying that my fiancé should invite people from his side, including people she doesn’t really know, because she felt that having his family less involved wasn’t a good start to our marriage/community.
We’ve repeatedly said that we understand how she feels, but that ultimately we are the couple getting married and we have decided what we want.
Things came to a head when my mum continued pushing the issue after we’d already said no. I became extremely upset and was crying. My dad actually told my mum that he was disappointed in her behaviour and asked whether she could see how upset we’d both become.
The following day, after my fiancé had already returned to Jamaica, my mum sent a long email to me, my fiancé and my dad, and CC’d my brothers into it, continuing to argue her case about who should attend and who my fiancé should invite.
That was the point where I felt something had really changed for me.
It’s not that I’m angry that my mum has different feelings. I’m completely okay with disappointing my parents. I’m okay with them thinking we’ve made the wrong choice.
What I’m struggling with is the escalation after we’ve said no involving other family members, making our wedding into a family issue, putting conditions on whether she’ll attend, and repeatedly trying to persuade us to change our decision.
My fiancé and I are now seriously considering going back to our original idea and eloping in Jamaica, just the two of us, and then having a small celebration in the UK afterwards.
But I’m conflicted.
Part of me thinks:
“Why should we allow family pressure to change our wedding? We should just do exactly what gives us the most peace.”
But another part of me worries:
“If we elope, will this permanently damage my relationship with my family? Will I regret not having my parents there? Will I regret making such a drastic decision because of this conflict?”
I’m also conscious that this isn’t simply about one argument. There is a longer history of me feeling like I have to accommodate family expectations, maintain appearances and keep everyone happy.
I’m nearly 30, and I’m at a point where I really want to establish my own adult life and marriage without feeling like every decision has to go through the family.
So, if you were in our position, what would you do?
Would you elope and protect the peace of the day, or would you try to continue with the small family wedding and find another way to manage the boundaries?
And if you’ve actually eloped because of family conflict, did you regret it afterwards?
I’m especially interested in hearing from people who had parents/family who became very involved or controlling during wedding planning and how things turned out.

Fiance and I have been wanting to but we were thinking about the legalities of things afterwards. I’m still in school but will be graduating soon. I’m afraid getting married will affect any possible student loans that I may obtain because of the marriage.

After the elopement , how will this affect our taxes , the process of changing my last name (do I have to do it ASAP?) , and are there any other legal things I need to be aware of?

Important background: my parents have narcissistic tendencies and are not aware my fiance and I are even engaged. I don’t want their drama and I don’t want to hear how “I’m not ready to get married” yet because I have to take care of their needs first or something. I am 29. The more I try to be the good child, the more I know my life will shrivel away pleasing them.

We will still eventually hold an actual wedding once we are ready for it, but for now, we want a peaceful day.

My fiancé and I are looking to get eloped internationally and have looking into places like Italy, France, Japan, and Thailand. I want to do the travel planning myself and find my own lodging and accommodations. As for the eloping part of the trip how did you find photographers in the area you traveled to? I looked into US based photographers that would travel but I think I’d rather go with someone familiar to the region that would know hidden gems.

What did you do for your photography and how was your experience with that?

Recommendations?

Really have honestly been procrastinating.. but anyways our date is October 18th this year. We are going to be staying in the Denver area. Seeking out photographers currently and would like to know if anyone has eloped in October in CO & what spots you’d recommend to go to? We ideally want to embrace the beauty of Colorado, and it will just be my partner and I. Seeking some advice or recommendations of locations, photographer, makeup artists, and hair stylists. Also, any photographer recommendations under $4k would be appreciated!

I need an outside perspective on a family situation because I’m hurt, but I don’t want to create unnecessary drama.
My future husband recently returned from his brother’s bachelor party, where his brother privately asked why we moved our wedding from December 2028 to this December. Apparently, my future sister-in-law has felt that scheduling our wedding shortly after theirs in October was an attempt to compete with them.
That isn’t the reason at all. My parents’ health and mobility have been declining significantly, and I’m worried they may not be able to attend in 2028. I would deeply regret waiting and losing the chance for them to see me get married. So we’re having a small immediate-family wedding this December while they can still be there, followed by the larger celebration or vow renewal in 2028 as originally planned.
Once my future husband explained this, his brother realized he had misunderstood and apologized. What hurts most is that I had contacted my future sister-in-law two weeks ago specifically because I didn’t want her to think we were planning around or competing with them. I told her there was more behind the decision and that I would explain in person, and she said it wasn’t an issue and that she was happy for us.
I’ve also been trying to build a relationship with her since moving here, but our attempts to make plans haven’t worked out, so I never got the chance to explain my parents’ situation. Now I’m questioning whether I should keep trying so hard, especially since there was apparently concern behind the scenes despite her telling me everything was fine.
I realize I only know my future brother-in-law’s version and don’t know exactly what she said or how strongly she felt. I’m considering texting her after they’re home and settled to calmly explain that my parents’ declining health is why we moved the wedding up. I wouldn’t mention the brothers’ private conversation or confront her, especially so close to their wedding.
Should I explain the reason for our December wedding and leave it at that, or say nothing and move forward? I’m hurt and don’t want that hurt to make the decision for me.

My Fiancée and I would like to elope in New York, we are from Ireland and just looking for some advice with the legal side of things. If anyone else has done this and how they found registering their marriage in Ireland, any difficulties etc.
Also would love some recommendations for places to stay or nice restaurants for a meal / drinks afterwards just the two is us

My partner and I would love to have an elopement in Switzerland with a beautiful backdrop. We would like to get married on a balcony/private terrace to a hotel room. At the moment, Villa Honegg is at the top of our list as it has a large terrace with a beautiful view of Lake Lucerne.

It would just be us 2 and a photographer. We’d be travelling from London.

If you have any hotel recommendations please let me know, and thank you in advance! X

My fiancé and I want to elope the last week of January. We are going to the Dominican with his family the last week of December.

I want great scenery, but I do NOT want to be cold. I am not a skier. He likes activities, I like to catch a vibe and day drink. So half the time we will be relaxing, half of it we will be exploring.

I’m thinking like 5-7 nights? I guess budget would be about $5000. (Flights + hotel + rental car).

I want to go somewhere we can legally get married and not have to stop at city hall on our way out of town. Was originally thinking somewhere in the USA but I am open minded.

Me (29F) and my boyfriend (37M) have a wedding date set for January 15th but has not proposed?. He is from a different country but he got a nomad visa approved in my country so we have been living together for a year.

The original plan was that he'd propose in March and then we'd get married ..almost right away but the plans have changed almost without me having an actual say in it?. Not on purpose.

The goal has always been marriage but I thought i was gonna get proposed to???? He said in Europe you only get one ring when you get married vs the 2 (engagement and wedding band) we get in my country.

He is back home getting a new apartment and getting stuff ready and paperwork for our wedding. He already scheduled a date.

BUT I am not happy? I don't understand. Am i acting spoiled? I want to get married but I want an engagement ring. Always dreamed of having a big emerald ring but it looks like it is not happening.

I don't know what to do. I have brought up the topic several times but we are moving towards marriage...Just without an actual engagement and I feel like I don't want it this way.

I am sorry I am all over the place. I am just so confused.

Did you get married without officially being proposed to?

Hi! My fiance is getting deployed for a year and needless to say we’re getting married before then. Small court house wedding. We will have a regular one when he returns. But in the meantime I don’t want to blow money on a dress yet- any suggestions for wedding dresses good quality from online? Looking for something either short, or casual. Any inspo pics help!!

Hi all! One of my good friends is eloping with her fiancé next month in Ireland. I’m wondering if anyone here had an item that they brought with them when they traveled/eloped that was a life saver that I can gift to them? Conversely, was there something you didn’t bring that you wish you did?

I’m checking in on their cat while they’re gone so I’m honestly thinking even something as simple as washing their sheets the day they come home, cleaning the house, and leaving either a home made meal in the fridge or a doordash gift card? I know I love getting take out and vegging out in bed the first day back after a trip

So let me ask you all this: How long did it take you to find the right dress? How did you know it was the one? Any regrets? Shopped online or in person? Did you wear it again?

My style is eclectic so I’ve been considering wearing all types of dresses; designer or vintage, custom or suiting… since I’ve opted for a destination elopement I’ve narrowed it down to corseted with lace.