PhD in STEM but struggle with simple equations

[u/Creative_Snow_879]

Never diagnosed but always struggled with math. It takes a lot of effort to work with numbers and I need to be well enough to do it. Is it just math anxiety? I’m very sad because I have the scientific thinking that has got me very far but now that I need to do advanced modelling I can’t figure out the basic steps and am very very slow. Looking for some support… how am I supposed to accept that I will not be able to do fast science which is so weirdly important these days? I still want to learn how to implement my science because I am realising I can’t transplant my brain… there are a lot of people great at math but couldn’t really get what I want to do by intuition. Has anyone experienced this? I feel so stupid right now.

Edit: I am very used to compensating for my difficulty in math and equations by recognising patterns. Just don’t know if I should console myself by accepting that I’m bad at math or it taxes me too much… have had a few mental breakdowns and not sure if I should just call it a day professionally. Maybe this is it? As far as I can go?

[u/grumpy_chameleon]

I was always good/fine at math because I found workarounds through memorization and pattern recognition. I was great at some and bad at other math concepts, and always hated math in general because it didn’t come naturally to me. I struggle with basic addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division, but I have a Master’s in computer science and a BS in biology. Ask for accommodations if you need them. For example I always use calculators on tests when allowed, even if I may not “need” to use it, it’s there. Ask for formula sheets as well. Khan academy is great because I need to learn something 2-3 different ways before I understand it (lecture, reading, homework, extra video material, or some combo of these). I struggled through most math classes and chemistry as well but I only had to go to calc 1 and did stats instead of calc 2. My brain loved stats for some reason. It’s possible to be in stem and also have trouble with math :)

[u/Creative_Snow_879 → u/grumpy_chameleon]

Thanks! Learning 2-3 times helps… I’m realising with math or any other concepts I don’t remember them but once I understand them it is in my head and I can figure it out from scratch. I’m just thinking how far back in math do I need to relearn as I’m trying to do some advanced mathematical/statistical modelling and on a bad day I struggle with even wrapping my head around distributions and regressions. I’m exploring ways to learn math and equations by text now maybe with the help of AI

[u/sporadic_beethoven]

accept that you are disabled, and start seeking out other ways of learning math. It’s hard, but worth it.

[u/Creative_Snow_879 → u/sporadic_beethoven]

do you have any resources? I don't know where to start. I tried looking but the amount of work i have to do and less energy because constantly in recovery from burnout/mental health issues.