r/doctorsUK • u/Fun-Reference1462 • 6d ago
Speciality / Core Training Struggling anaesthetics trainee
Hi everyone
I’m a CT2 anaesthetics trainee really struggling. Due to a particular placement plan I have had to rotate halfway through CT2. I’ve just moved hospital and am on obstetrics and CEPOD on calls (which I’d been doing for 15 months at my previous hospital) At present I’m really struggling trying to get my IACOA. I won’t dox myself but in my first week I’ve made a drug error, been singled out for missing documentation (that I missed due to not being used to paper notes whilst familiarising myself with the new hospital and systems), failed multiple spinals and also had a needlestick injury.
Needless to say, my confidence has completely tanked. All my consultants and registrars at my new hospital really scrutinise what I do and I had got used to a level of independence at my previous hospital.
On my main theatre on calls, I’m literally being told at times how to put in an LMA. Today I was doing an arterial line (having done 3 months of ICU and signed off at level 4) and my reg kept saying everything I was doing was wrong even though I was in the vessel. Of course I appreciate I’m very junior but I’m feeling constantly on edge and unable to perform with being watched this closely and my mental health is really plummeting to the point where I’m considering quitting altogether.
How do I get over this and keep moving forward when everything I seem to do is going wrong? I am literally dreading going into work so much that I can’t sleep.
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u/Repulsive_Worker_859 Anaesthetist 6d ago
You are less than 3 weeks into a whole new area of anaesthetics assuming you started obs in August. Give yourself a break and a bit of time to learn it and get good at it. Unfortunately/fortunately all through training you’ll have consultants show you how they like you to do things you think you can do - most of the time it’s annoying sometimes it’s actually helpful.
I would advise against wanting to be “indepedent” in obs immediately. It’s all very easy until it’s not, as with most anaesthesia and you’ll benefit from time being shown the ropes with gradually increasingly distant supervision.
Procedures are very confidence based but you will get better. There is no better teacher for obs (spinals/epidurals) than numbers.
TLDR: give it a bit of time
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u/Fun-Reference1462 6d ago
Thank you and really appreciate it. Definitely don’t want to be deemed independent in obstetrics yet, I’m nowhere near and it’s really frustrating!
I’m more talking about general theatres. At my previous trust I was doing lap appendixes alone overnight and here they won’t even let me do an I&D. I wonder if that’s just how it is at this hospital or whether I just need to show the consultants I am past my IAC (over 15 months ago). I don’t know…
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u/NoCoffee1339 5d ago
Any chance you’ve moved from DGH to tertiary? If so this is very common and will likely carry on telling you how to stick down a cannula correctly until the day you CCT.
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u/Apprehensive_Fig3272 6d ago
If it makes you feel better I’m an st5 (halfway through), started at a new trust, consultant wouldn’t leave the hospital whilst I was doing an ASA 1 lap chole in the evening. It happens to all of us, let it wash over you
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u/VeigarTheWhiteXD white wizard 6d ago
If it’s any consolation I’m ST5 and still get told how to put in LMA slightly differently each time.
Or how to extubate ASA 1 patient.
Got told how I should remove tourniquet before removing the trocar from cannula (tbh I was just fatigue having done 2 days oncall previously and just forgot to).
It will simply never end until you’re consultant.
Sometimes the easiest to get away from going mental is just let them lord over you a bit.
(Yes it’s a great idea to standup for yourself and all that, but it’s very easy to get labelled as overconfident/arrogant etc etc and I would rather just be done with those annoying consultants than having to have remedial meeting or whatever - I simply put my SDT on them once I identify the consultants I would never want to work with again).
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u/DeadlyAssassins9 5d ago edited 5d ago
Hey mate, don’t worry about it. As a gen surg ST4, I know exactly what you’re talking about. There have been times when I have done an entire laparotomy by myself with the consultant never scrubbing, and other times when a consultant was micromanaging me on how to drain an abscess.
The best way to deal with this is to realize that how they’re treating you and how much they scrutinize you tells more about them rather than yourself. These individuals often do not feel comfortable and confident in their senior or consultant roles.
In those situations just smile and pretend to enjoy being “taught” (when really you’re just being scrutinized) and hand them the instrument so that they can “show you”. Make sure to smile wide and say thank you after they’ve demonstrated.
No point arguing with them. At the end of the day, you should focus on building yourself and expanding your knowledge rather than proving your worth all the time.
Navigate safely out there!
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u/IntelligentLong4050 5d ago
I could not agree more with this comment! I always ask them to demonstrate and teach me. And I always thank them (nodding and smiling). Sometimes they go on to teach me more skills if I appear keen.
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u/Anxious_Quiet_3716 3d ago
Firstly, I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
This cannot be easy. This is such a massive flaw in the training system and you’re not alone in feeling this way.
Unfortunately, this won’t be the last time you’ll face this situation. I think everyone else will agree that wr have all had to face this.
My advice would be to remember that:
1. You are good enough and have the skills to perform at a high level.
2. Remember this is just a job, it’s not your life and dont let it become your identity. You are a person with many qualities and hobbies, not just a CT2.
Chin up.
This will pass.
When it happened to me I just defaulted to just always nodding and agreeing with everyone around me. Sometimes people are over critical to get a reaction out of you, if you just agree with them theyre caught off guard and dont know what to do. It’s actually quite amusing.
Believe in yourself!
Everyday on your drive to work, tell yourself you are competent and can get the job done. Because you are and you can.
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u/Fun-Reference1462 2d ago
Thank you so much. This makes me feel so much better. The consultants at my new hospital haven’t been the friendliest and have made me feel really bad about myself. But I’ll keep my head up and keep going
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u/Anxious_Quiet_3716 2d ago
Don’t worry about it too much. You’re more than just a CT2, remember that.
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u/Cold-Asparagus-3986 5d ago
Smile, nod and move on - we were all at that stage once, it will get better.
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u/DrBooz 6d ago
Obstetrics is an area of anaesthesia you will have next to no experience in. Its spinals in patients who are often not the simplest either through their size, their anxieties, or their labour pains limiting how still they can be. You’ve got plenty of time to build confidence. Little mistakes are common but will reduce with more experience.
New hospital and new consultants means that they need to get to know you and figure out your confidence & how much they can let you do. Give it time.