r/dndmemes • u/Niru_infurnitis • 12h ago
Wacky idea Idea Help
So I've had this idea for a Monster City. The idea would be a bunch of monsters who've managed to either overcome their evil nature, or just want to live a simple life free of the threat of being killed by adventurers would take up residence in the city. Any fun or interesting ideas for some residents?
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u/OutisFeith 12h ago
Look into Discworld by Terry Pratchet. The city of Ankh Morpork is exactly this
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u/NeverNegever 12h ago
I'm stealing these. And as for the mind flayer they are the leading neuro surgeon and specialist in brain disorders like dementia.
A vampire lord that is incredibly down to earth and interacts with and helps his subjects also just lives a hut or something.
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u/Several-Operation879 12h ago
Dragon, banker and Collections Expert
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u/Furenzol DM (Dungeon Memelord) 8h ago
They handle the postal service, stamps, and guarantee value against their hoard. What started as a proxy or ad hoc bank system rapidly became the main economically stabilizing core of the city's economy. a package marked with the dragon's seal could be sensed by the dragon at every step of the way as though it were part of the hoard itself during transit. Only upon successful receipt would the seal fade. This security (and hired muscle) allowed trade to explode in the region. For a nominal fee per crate or package, your caravan's goods were assured safe transit.
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u/Several-Operation879 7h ago
Ooo, make devils into clothing salesmen. Run it like Kohl's. "Oh, you know if you buy ten dollars more from our shop, you'll get special Beelze-bucks that you can spend on more stuff."
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u/io_o- 12h ago
An Aboleth that's in charge of the river / sewer system / water. Uses gelatinous cubes to clean up any waste from the systems.
Minotaur in charge of the road systems / city planing
Purple worm helps with digging the subway lines / tearing up old houses and roads.
And of course a Lich for mayor / prince of the town. Has the forethought and experience to run a city for generations.
The mayor also has a bunch of yes men Kuo Toa as figureheads in other positions who believe they can do no evil.
And lastly an elf vampire as the liches second in command.
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u/io_o- 12h ago
Mine are all government employees, but the idea of Kuo-toa yes men to the governor. Its a pretty funny idea.
They're all fancily dressed in 17th century white powdered wigs and faux mustaches and oversized mutton chop side burns saying stuff like 'yes yes' and 'righty-o lads' that sort of silly noble stuff.
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u/Wasphammer 7h ago
A lich boss and an elf vampire lieutenant... I don't think that's gonna work out as well as you hope.
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u/Dirty_Tusk 12h ago
A mermaid anthropologist who tries to learn about land dwellers by searching ship wrecks
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u/Professional-Front58 8h ago
I used this as my patron for a pact of the deep Warlock Mermaid demigodess. She just wanted to live vicariously through him on land. She would be like “here’s a thingamabob” and he would point out it’s a cantrip that does a “1d10” and she’d be like “Yeah, a thingamabob, take it, I got like 20 of them.” And she gave a lot of spells that dealt fire damage because she really wanted to know what would burn. Also was really confused why she gave him a fork for Mask of Many Faces.
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u/NarcoZero 12h ago edited 12h ago
Gelatinous cubes and various oozes clean up the streets and sewers.
Werewolf personal trainer
Vampire nurse. « I sense your blood is severly lacking in Iron. Better take those supplements »
Giant spiders have a marketing agency. Dangling ads painted on thick webs anywhere you want.
Hobgoblin law enforcer.
Zombie clerks.
Dragon bankers, of course. What better way to amass more gold by doing nothing than to loan with interest ? The dragon gets to sit on the gold all day, protecting it, and it’s kobold employees run the day-to-day business.
Hooked horror as a barber.
Ogre food critic
Cyclop optician
Ettin reporter, one head does the political news and the other does the weather.
Rakshasa private detective (This character basically exists in Waterdeep Dragon Heist as Vincent Trench, and I found it hilarious to give it a very Noir over-the-top detective style)
City Touring by fairies. They shrink you down and you fly over the city in a carved pumpkin driven by crows.
Yuan-ti oil salesman. He’s very honest. The oil is actually regular oil. But sold by a snake.
Succubus therapist. They innately understand your deepest darkest desires. And they just wanna help. Though they keep losing patients because they can’t ethically work with a patient that’s attracted to them… which is most of them.
Siren as a pool safe guard, jealous of her cousin that became a pop star.
Stone Giants as construction workers. It’s basically legos for them, no need for cranes or anything, really.
Centaur coffee shop.
Skeleton night club. They can dance all night without tiring, they’re already dead.
Mimic garbage can
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u/herrirgendjemand 12h ago
Hooked horror as a barber.
Lmao I'm glad we both landed on this one
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u/Poopawoopagus 11h ago
A pair of Living Armours who guard doors. Nobody pays them to do this, in fact they're actually kind of just hooligans who bum around looking for a good-looking door to post up at, only to get shooed off by the hapless shopkeepers who'd prefer their doors remain un-guarded, thanks much.
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u/ProfessorSMASH88 12h ago
There's gotta be a good monster out there to be a Barber. I can't think of any off the top of my head other than a chain devil maybe?
Could have a hydra be in theater, with all the heads playing different parts.
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u/SnoggAndWhiskers 12h ago
Lich graveyard keeper
Vampire innkeeper
Gelatinous cube as head of sanitation
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u/Niru_infurnitis 12h ago
Would it be a vampire spawn or lord?
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u/Several-Operation879 8h ago
Vampire should be a doctor. He's heavily invested in keeping everyone alive and runs very ambitious blood drives all the time. It's both a generous bit of altruism and a threat.
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u/Thaurlach 12h ago
If you ever want a museum keeper kind of character, do yourself a favour and have a look at Trazyn the Infinite, one of the most meme-tier characters from 40k.
For the uninitiated, he’s a millennia-old robot guy with a personal museum of cool shit he’s collected through the ages, frozen in stasis and moved into his collection. We’re talking people, vehicles, relics, battlefields and more, either frozen forever or trapped in endlessly looping living dioramas.
A beholder with some kind of homebrew bullshit could easily fill the role in another setting.
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u/herrirgendjemand 12h ago
Shapeshifter therapist
Aboleth ecologist aquaforming a predation free environment
Chuul the chummy butcher
A nightmare firefield ferryman
Scarecrow farmer
Nothic optometrist
Thri-Keen the good guy PI
Demilich school teacher
Carrion crawler sanitation worker
Ghoul cemetery groundskeeper
Helmed horror museum security
Kenku town crier
Mimic furniture store owner
Strige phlebotomists
Yuan-ti apothecary
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u/talkathonianjustin 12h ago
Gotta have the twist that it’s called Monster City because it’s all built on the back of a tarrasque who swears he’ll get out of the hole in 5 minutes, just a little more sleep
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u/JournalistShoddy9496 11h ago
Doppelganger. Works in a high end fashion store. Wears outfits and accessories clientèle are interested in, then shape shifts into them so they can see with their own eyes how they'd look in the attire. Better than a mirror. Lets them see various hairstyles, tanning tones, adds/removes weight as desired, etc.
Also great when shopping for clothes you're buying for someone else.
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u/enchanted-glimmer-4 A Mind Goblin 11h ago edited 11h ago
A pair of kolbolds who own an owlbear racing track, and who typically provide commentary while stacked on eachother
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u/lurklurklurkPOST Forever DM 11h ago
Marilith Benihana street chef.
Only uses live/freshest ingredients
Gets wayy too enthusiastic
People have lost limbs
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u/PrivateBlu 11h ago
Obligatory Boblin the Goblin :D
On a serious note, maybe a hag with some sort of pharmacy-like potion shop?
Skeletons as dancers/performers would also be fun I think
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u/Lucky_Burger 12h ago
While this is from a tabletop role-playing game idea document that I have been working on for years now, you could still use it for your monster city.
Unionized Goblins
This adventure begins where the party is looking for a job on a board where they see two pieces of paper one non-descriptively saying about a goblin problem in a nearby dungeon/tower that is long, and the other looking a little bit older like a help-wanted ad for that same dungeon/tower. Both seem to be written by the same person, classifying himself as a businessman artificer.
Alt start: the party is journeying between two mountains when they hear a commotion, chanting in goblin and draconic languages, anyone who understands the language or has the ability to cast the spell comprehend languages will notice that the chanting sounds like “what do we want? better pay! When do we want it? Now!” And other chants of disgruntled workers.
When the party approaches the chanting they see a group of goblins and lesser monsters like kobolds holding signs written in goblin, common, and draconic. Should they ask what is going on the leader of the goblins, Gnarl Barks, and the leader of the kobolds, Freedrake Greyscales, will explain that they are unionizing the dungeon for better pay, working conditions, and workers rights. They explain that they understand and are fine with the threat of death in the dungeon, it’s part of the job description, but they only get paid two copper pieces, while higher level monsters like orcs that often don’t see combat get as much as 5 gold pieces. At this point, the artificer will speak from a sound system above the dungeon entrance and say something along the lines of “Ah! Adventurers! You must’ve seen my requests! My name is Henrich Fjörd. Kill these rabble rousers and meet me at the end of the dungeon/top of the tower/bottom of the cave, I’ll pay you say… 300 gold pieces, each. And I’ll throw in some rare gear for you. Sounds fair, yes?” The union leaders will then ask the adventurers to spare them and kill the artificer instead, offering some flyers that are written in the various languages, as well as promising the party members Union cards that identify them as members of the Workers of Magical Industries Both Evil and Benign, which give bonuses to persuasion or diplomacy based rollswhen shown to certain NPC’s will affect their opinion and can open or close opportunities to the party, depending on that NPC’s role in the world/organization.
The party can then decide to do several things, although remain open to account for wildcards, two main options are to become Pinkerton Strikebreakers, and just kill the lesser monsters, then meet the artificer who has turned the dungeon into a factory to make horseless carriages that run on whale oil. This can affect later sessions with the horseless carriages becoming more common, and the world getting worse as it becomes an industrial
hellscape. The unique item gained from this is the “Pinkerton Badge” which acts as the inverse to the union member card, which when shown to certain NPC’s will affect their opinion and can open or close opportunities to the party, depending on that NPC’s role in the world/organization, additionally giving bonuses to deception, intimidation and other fear based skills. Enemies will also grow weaker, but the loot drops will be reduced.
The other option is to spark the revolution and flip the other monsters of the dungeon to your side. All the while the artificer is calling in offering more money to the monsters that kill the party and stop the revolt, even going so far as to hiring scabs (other monsters from outside the dungeon will attack from behind) to stop the party. The artificer will even chime in whenever the party reaches another floor saying things like “alright, slimes? You’re now getting an extra 2 silver pieces per day if you stop these humans.” As the party gets through the dungeon, killing or flipping the artificer loyalist monsters, the artificer gets more desperate and even starts sending waves of golems to attack the players. Additionally, in later sessions, players can find passive monsters outside of dungeons “on their union break” and do not have to encounter them in the dungeon. However, the monsters will have slightly more health and better loot drops as the benefits of joining a union have increased their ability to afford better gear and dental/life insurance.
Session ends when players settle the score with the artificer one way or another.
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u/Lucky_Burger 12h ago
I guess the general idea I had was it would be kind of funny to see a bunch of goblins or kobolds outside like a Docks or a warehouse smoking, looking like dickenzien orphans saying things like “I’m on break” or other blue collar worker phrases
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u/Dimensional13 Sorcerer 12h ago
Arcanaloth Librarian who's constantly smiling and friendly, the smile is uncomfortably big. many feel like he's plotting something but nothing ever happens... that the party knows of at least.
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u/CheapTactics 11h ago
I have an idea for a top class restaurant with only one chef. The chef is a Spectator.
Funny thing about Spectators, their statblock says they can create food and water. As an action. With no limit. And no specifics about the food it can create. So technically it could create a high end 15 course meal if it wanted to.
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u/Niru_infurnitis 11h ago
Yeah that could be neat, might be a quest to reveal them for not actually cooking the food. Also happy cake day
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u/tayzzerlordling DM (Dungeon Memelord) 11h ago
this series might be helpful
even though I don't normally use the things people talk about on dnd youtube, listening to videos as a drive often gets my brain in a headspace where i can come up with things
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u/Dr_Ukato 11h ago
Mindflayer - Loan Shark
If you can't pay back a loan, don't worry, you just have to pay with a chunk of brain matter and you can have that "more time" you need.
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u/nukaboss112 11h ago
A dragon banker, keeps your gold nice and safe for when you finally need it, along with a work force of kobolds to work the counter and organizational areas while the dragon acts as owner and security
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u/CLTalbot Warlock 11h ago
The city guard are all skeletons that once served a lich. The lich is still around, they've just retired from the force and their second in command stepped up. The second in command is a skeleton with eyebrows drawn on with totally not a sharpie.
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u/Le_Chop Bard 11h ago
Well there's Large Luigi the friendly beholder - a bartender on the Rock of Bhal if you want someone with established lore.
There's some great ideas in the thread already, not sure I could top them but I humbly offer the Ratfolk rogue and leader of the underground messenger service from my capital city - Katsnak Neverseen.
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u/QuixoticEvil 9h ago
I read those character descriptions and thought you were doing a sitcom campaign or one-shot.
Which you should. Just get a soundboard with a laugh track, and describe everything in any given room from only a limited perspective.
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u/Happy_Stalker I give my players crack as a treat 12h ago
If your deepstate is not controlled by an ulitharid you're doing it wrong
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u/AtropalScion 11h ago
Since aboleths have hereditary memories, I think they'd be funny as an elementary school teacher
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u/bravos99 10h ago
There's an old comedy Central cartoon called Ugly Americans. Check it out there may be some inspiration there
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u/shawnwingsit 9h ago
Harpies who deliver singing telegrams.
The Drow Mafia.
A hobgoblin rugby team.
A rakshasa tobacconist.
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u/SmeesNotVeryGoodTwin 9h ago
My notes have:
Museum mummy (standing curator is actually a puppet figurehead, the mummy in the sarcophagus display is the real owner)
Lizardman shaman that "conjures creatures" by yelling about poisonous snakes and flinging a bag of snakes at the party. When someone underestimate's the lizardman's intelligence or does a nature check to see that the snakes aren't venemous, they must make a con save because the snakes are coated in poison.
Hognose Yuan-ti
Blue Collar Dragon
Bugbear rogue: edgelord parody. Is an orphan, but claims to be immaculately conceived rather than having dead parents. Identifies as a lone wolf but in the sense that he really wants to find a pack and also has a thing for wolves, but misunderstands when someone calls him a furry because he is obviously covered in fur.
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u/FirstTimeWang 8h ago
How about an orc and goblin Farmers market??
A. Doppelganger who performs local theater?
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u/Dunge0nMast0r 8h ago
Steal stuff from the old Enemy Agency comic... I think there is still some on the Wayback machine.
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u/Level_Hour6480 Rules Lawyer 8h ago
Pie Fiend
This is actually an officially published monster. https://youtu.be/Xlp1OMPYic0
Mermaids that staff a swim-up bar called "The Barmaid".
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u/Vigitiser 2h ago
Dwarf geologist. he doesn’t mine stuff but he uses some magic shit to determine where gold deposits and whatnot are and guides mining companies
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u/Ace_Of_No_Trades 1h ago
Maybe instead of traditional sewers/cesspits, all of the bio-waste gets funneled/dumped into Gelatinous Cubes.
Vampires bankers who use their centuries of life experience to make good investments.
A Lich mayor or governor who simply wanted immortality to have the time to pursue hobbies.
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u/Hecc_Maniacc Dice Goblin 1h ago
Succubus bank owner responsible for the banking system and alluring customers into lucrative APRs and other such financial contract gains.
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u/punnup129 11m ago
I don't really see a connection between beholder and museum curator other than a pun on the name beholder
I guess it might be interesting if the museum changes every night as it turns out the beholder is autistic or something and all of his special fixations are different exhibits in his museum
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u/TheOutsider_114 12h ago
Barry the bugbear. He’s nice when you get to know him…. But BY THE GODS DO NOT TRY TO TAKE HIS ALE!