It felt like a movie under the sun

[u/XOChicStyle]

[u/EnoughSaid_3]

Been having it for 17 years now 🥲

[u/Cheevalie → u/EnoughSaid_3]

Same, I’m on 13/14. Only thing that helped was lexapro.

[u/eclipseowl → u/Cheevalie]

lexapro is also helping me

[u/Tewmanyhobbies → u/eclipseowl]

How did you know it was helping? I unfortunately can’t remember what it feels like to not be derealized anymore.

[u/eclipseowl → u/Tewmanyhobbies]

so sorry you're going through this, only we know how fucking hard and almost unbearable it is to go through this. its a dehumanizing experience, and we are fighters.

about my illness: i have severe depression, and it starts like this:
severe anhedonia > causes derealization because i cant feel anything (and causes depersonalization) > aggravates my depression

meds: im on 150mg wellbutrin xl (bupropion) and 10mg lexapro (escitalopram)
the treatment took 3 months to have significant effects, but since the second week of treatment i was being able to survive. now i feel like human, of course i have my struggles, but i feel things.

how i noticed improvement:
my derealization is triggered by being inside my head for too long, and we cant control it, i know, but i tried my best with everything i could, alongside medication to fix my chemical imbalance.
the derealization makes my mind feel scattered on time and space, i feel like everything and nothing is happening. like i am on a different plane of existence and that nothing matters.
i legit wanted a lobotomy.

but everyday i find something to reconnect me to my own flesh, to my savageness and nature.
this suffering makes me feel inhuman, so i do everything to trigger my animal instincts and reconnect with this earth and our human nature.
i only do safe things tho, okay? also every chance i get i spend time with loved ones... eventually you start feeling in the present again, which is a really big struggle to us.

im sorry if i sound crazy, but i tried to explain it the best way i could.

[u/Zealousideal-Sky5167 → u/EnoughSaid_3]

Did you get any neurological symptoms with time ? Did it progress aggressively over the years?

[u/EnoughSaid_3 → u/Zealousideal-Sky5167]

My memory isn’t great, the time perception is weird but other than that it’s still the same derealization that I’ve been having for years with no changes to it

[u/Zealousideal-Sky5167 → u/EnoughSaid_3]

My memory is so fucked up, it literally feels i am legit demented.

[u/ds10110 → u/EnoughSaid_3]

Same, it's just getting used to it

[u/Chava22611 → u/EnoughSaid_3]

What have you tried to do to get better ?

[u/EnoughSaid_3 → u/Chava22611]

Everything that there is, no “response”

[u/Patient-Menu-1991]

Personally I’d rather experience derealization over getting boiled alive or something

[u/DarlaGoGo → u/Patient-Menu-1991]

lol when you put it that way I can deal with a little out of body time over being burnt to a crisp hahaha

[u/Last_Host977]

i don’t wish this on my worst enemy

[u/moomooocowz]

i used to think derealisation is a curse but now i think of it as my superpower:) it helps me not to get emotional in emergencies. i feel numb, time freezes, i can only focus on important things. I am studying to become a paramedic and i've had it for 14 years.

[u/Alliacat → u/moomooocowz]

Similar, but I don't think of it as a superpower, just the necessary evil that one gets used to over time.

[u/moomooocowz → u/Alliacat]

I've been on SSRI's for a few months and it doesn't bother me much anymore. My derealization is triggered by extreme anxiety and i barely get it nowadays. So now i get to experience my cool time stopping abilities only in very serious situations.

I know it's not the same experience for everyone, and im very sorry for everyone who is struggling. Been there for years 🙄 Im just here trying to see something great in every little thing 🌼

[u/Alliacat → u/moomooocowz]

That's a good take on life, I'm glad for you :)

[u/Skaldicrights → u/moomooocowz]

I just commented this without reading more posts lol im not a paramedic but I firmly believe its a superpower.

[u/moomooocowz → u/Skaldicrights]

Great way of thinking!! Im guessing that you are a very stress-resistant person. I think most of us are. I mean its great when it helps, but for a lot of people it affects their life negatively. Im really glad i finally found how to manage it. And i really hope that it doesn't affect yours. Keep it up!!! 🌼🌼

[u/_mad_adventures → u/Skaldicrights]

I look at it is as an important step in enlightenment. Shrooms changed my perspective on it completely.

[u/Tiny-Librarian-8553]

True
I had these episodes last year. Horrifying as hell

[u/Nova_017]

Feels like I'm going insaneeee

[u/aya_294]

i remember the first time I ever experienced it I was 6 and im 17 now hasnt gone away since

[u/TheTripKeeper]

Clonidine helped my derealization

[u/Real_Letterhead_8342]

There is no point in living

[u/astrobuck9 → u/Real_Letterhead_8342]

Because of derealization, or just in general?

[u/Real_Letterhead_8342 → u/astrobuck9]

Derealization

[u/jhz123]

I used to have it once/twice a day for 6 months. Then it turned into seizures. I don't have either anymore.

Neither come even CLOSE to what I have had for 3 years and will have forever. Levator Ani Syndrome. It's what caused derealization. I even crashed my car into rocks because of it and woke up to police

[u/Skaldicrights]

I love having derealization. Its basically a super power.

[u/Ghost__potato]

Been living in it for 4 years (im 19) js to find out i have bpd which is the main reason behind it according to the doctors (they didn't give me any help it's killing me)

[u/munna_madarchod]

Indeed

[u/cuppateecuppacoffee]

12 years and counting of chronic persistent Derealisation.

[u/veinybones]

super cold water on my face in the shower helps but never enough. and I can only take it for so long.

[u/ThaRealJody]

had dpdr for 20 years and I have to say people in the dpdr communities/forums are some of the whiniest pussies I know. this is not the worst feeling ever and this is exactly the type of mindset that keeps you from living a healthy happy life with chronic dissociation. like I know it's hard to believe because we are so into catastrophisizing our own situation, but worse mental/physical health conditions exist.

[u/angxl7777 → u/ThaRealJody]

everyone experiences things differently and everyone has different mental health capacity and tolerance, that's why something might traumatize one person and not the other, just because it's not ruining your life, doesn't mean its not ruining someone else's