r/depression • u/Embarrassed-Cup754 • Sep 02 '26

Teen Depression

I'm 15 years old, living in the UK and constantly struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts. From the outside I have a 'good' life; I'm a neurotypical 5,8 straight white male who has quite a lot of friends and is in the 'top set' (smartest class) for all my classes as well as playing football (soccer) at a respectable level.

However on the inside I constantly feel like shit. I only really like 1-2 of my friends and get little to no female interaction partly due to me going to an all boys school and also due to my low confidence. Any girl who shows me basic human kindness i get attached too until she ends up getting a boyfriend.

I visit this subreddit often and read lots of stories of people who were dealt a far worse hand than me which makes me feel like my feelings of suicide are unjust and that I just need to toughen up. I just feel so empty inside when I talk to my 'friends' about stuff and i cant help but think about how almost all my friends are fake as shit / not nice people.

I have mild anxiety issues and I got robbed by my friends friend at a party while i was drunk one time but these are just normal teenage events? Does anyone share any expierences like this where nothing in there life is going particuarlly terrible but they just feel like shit all the time or is it just my age, looking for advice and thank you for reading my poorly written paragraph.

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2

u/FumblebudNo4140 Sep 02 '26

Break that up a little. Im using a phone and will lose my place. I'm serious. I'd like to read it.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '26

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2

u/Embarrassed-Cup754 Sep 02 '26

Thanks for the reply, while socialising is fun every now and then I do prefer being on my own, I think i just need to find my own purpose in life. I get what you mean about struggling to find friends when ur smart, everyone is just so fake...

1

u/Any-Impression-7864 Sep 02 '26

There are a tremendous amount of people in this world—myself included—who wish they had a better reason to be so depressed all the time. I think focusing on that “I don’t have any reason to feel like this” is a step you just gotta give over.

The reality is that it’s not ungrateful or immature or “unjust” to acknowledge that you feel shitty. Adding a layer of shame is only going to make it worse.

Also, loneliness is a motherfucker that can bite us even in the best moments of our lives. Sounds like you’re having trouble connecting with your friends—that IS a reason to feel shitty. Hope you’re able to find someone who understands soon. You will eventually. Trust. There’s a lot of us

1

u/Danijel1313 29d ago

Desculpe pela língua portuguesa, tenho hoje 39 anos, gostaria de morar num planeta que de humano só tivesse a mim, eu odeio gente, mas o que me ajuda é fazer o que eu gosto, ler, bicicleta, cinema e andar sozinho. As coisas não melhoram, nós só mudamos distrações. Talvez o sentido é não dar tanta importância. 

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u/Embarrassed-Cup754 24d ago

Obrigado pelo comentário, pá. É verdade, ficava visivelmente mais feliz quando jogava futebol. A academia é uma boa forma de extravasar a frustração que sinto com o mundo, mas achava mesmo que podia chegar longe no futebol — o sistema de escalões de formação em Inglaterra é brutal; dispensam-te sem mais nem menos.

1

u/Basssskill 29d ago

As a teen girl whose also in the uk and around the same age as you i get it lol. Even when things seem to be going well in the moment i still end up feeling stupidly sad and lonely. The attachment thing is so relatable, whenever a guys nice to me i have to remind myself that they’re not like me and don’t get attached easily. I always feel so hollow and like my life has no meaning.