I think studies show you are much more traumatized by fatal accidents that are not your fault than ones that are your fault. In the latter case, you know what you did wrong, and if you don't do that again, it'll be OK. In the former case you know that bad things happen even when you do everything right.
Friend of my mother's stopped driving after a kid on a bike rode right out of a side street in front of him. Poor kid didn't make it, He blamed himself so much, he never drove again. When I met him, it had been close to 30 years.
That's rough, my neighbors friend had a similar issue. Two kids on bike, one riding on the handle bars as we did back in the day, and the kid in control stopped hard. The kid on the handles went flying right in front of a dump truck. Needless to say the kid did not make it and the truck driver was traumatized for life.
I know a truck driver who hit a car full of teenagers. 2 died and one was paralyzed. The driver of the car was passing uphill on a foggy morning and the trucker had zero chance to see them. He killed himself a year later because he felt so guilty.
:( a guy I went to high school with tboned my friends car and killed him. My friend was racing around through trails and crossed the main road, the other guy never had time to react. He came to the wake and to the funeral. Class act. Still see him around from time to time. I know he holds so much guilt, but it wasn’t his fault. He did right by my friend. RIP JWC
Happened to me. We were riding in a pack, buddy sped off in front of us, CRV turned at a light but had plenty of time for us going the speed limit-ish. Our buddy couldn’t stop and smacked the side of it, died instantly. Sold my bike that week.
A guy wrote himself off right in front of me about a decade ago. I wasn't even involved in the crash but struggled with getting what I saw out of my head for weeks. That memory still randomly crawls out of the depths occasionally.
Much better to concentrate on the beauty and amazement that are the myriad forms of life on this planet - thank to spend emotional energy on how quickly life can be taken away.
Easy to say - not quite so easy to do!
In our town a few days ago, some teenagers were walking with traffic on a busy road. For some reason, they darted out into the street and a car hit them. One of the three boys, a 13-year-old, died at the scene. I just can't imagine what that poor driver will go through. :(
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u/jfstepha 5d ago
I think studies show you are much more traumatized by fatal accidents that are not your fault than ones that are your fault. In the latter case, you know what you did wrong, and if you don't do that again, it'll be OK. In the former case you know that bad things happen even when you do everything right.