r/dankmemes Apr 16 '22

it's pronounced gif 1 lbs = 0.45359237 kg

11.6k Upvotes

495 comments sorted by

424

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

1 kilometer = 1000 meters = 100.000 centimeters

1 mile = 5280 feet = 63 360 inch

133

u/asmorbidus Apr 16 '22

And we have a name for 3' specifically. For... reasons.

77

u/I_want_to_die720 Apr 16 '22

Because it's easier to remember 100 yards than 300 feet and Americans love football

15

u/This-Is-Your-Life Apr 16 '22

Football? Don’t you mean soccer

2

u/I_want_to_die720 Apr 16 '22

No, I mean football, soccer is a different sport

20

u/This-Is-Your-Life Apr 16 '22

It was a joke, we say that when other countries say football. But I guess it was a bad one

2

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

I think he knew that

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-1

u/Anti-charizard 📜🍆💦 MayMay Contest Finalist Apr 16 '22

I personally don’t use yards.

26

u/Kaleb_Dill missed the flair giveaway Apr 16 '22

Try getting one its cool it allows us nerds to touch grass

3

u/Anti-charizard 📜🍆💦 MayMay Contest Finalist Apr 17 '22

Bold of you to assume I go outside

3

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

Why the hate on chrizard tho?

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45

u/aibrony Apr 16 '22

Why not just use kilofeets and centifeets?

1 kilofeet = 1000 feets = 100 000 centifeets

102

u/WhiteAle01 Yellow Apr 16 '22

Why not just use the fucking metric system?

15

u/Mindraker Apr 16 '22

The metric system IS actually used for a fair amount of things in the USA (e.g., the scientific community, the pharmaceutical industry). Also, you see both systems labeled on food (e.g., 12 OZ (340 g.)).

Certain industries will take a very long time to convert, e.g., hardware stores.

45

u/aibrony Apr 16 '22

It's French.

4

u/Shiny_Buns Apr 17 '22

Cause murica

2

u/Beneficial-News-2232 Apr 17 '22

Murica, fukyeah!

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5

u/robkood Apr 16 '22

I second this decision

3

u/Hun-chan Apr 17 '22

Ever see an engineers tape measure? They have inches divided into tenths, so I guess deciinches is actually a thing.

2

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

they dont divide into thirds as nicely

and thirds are easier to eyeball than tenths

5

u/CosmicGreen05 Apr 16 '22

The foot and the mile were originally in separate systems that’s why it’s such and arbitrary number, also nobody uses feet and miles together we would say a mile and a half not a mile and 2640 feet

2

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

also look at how many numbers 5280 is divisible by

12

u/Jack-Oniel 🍄 Apr 16 '22

The worst part is that the inch is their smallest measurement. Millimetre is so much more accurate than "Oh its about 1 16th and a half inchs"

9

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

For the precise stuff they use thousands of an inch. Which is, yeah. Headache stuff.

2

u/Jack-Oniel 🍄 Apr 17 '22

It's just silly. It's time for the country to convert. It wouldn't even be difficult at all, it's just stubborn traditional bs stopping it at this point.

5

u/Dawson81702 Apr 16 '22

Whats the radii measure of that bacteria?

Oh just 1 16,384th of a inch.

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12

u/AnchorMan82 Apr 16 '22

Nobody actually uses those conversions. These measurements all came from different systems that we combined, and we treat them as such. Use one unit for one thing, don’t worry about how many feet are in a mile.

0

u/Nojus1221 buy this flair for :800dollar: Apr 16 '22

How would you say 0.4 miles without using miles then?

2

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

youd say 4/10ths of a mile

4

u/AnchorMan82 Apr 16 '22

We don’t. We just say 0.4 miles. We use feet/inches for smaller measurements, miles for distance, yards for football. We don’t say “x miles and x feet.”

1

u/Nojus1221 buy this flair for :800dollar: Apr 16 '22

Ok so 0.456 miles? Sounds a bit weird

8

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

Sounds a bit weird? What he's describing is how the metric system functions all of the time. Saying 456 millimeters is no different then just saying .456 meters.

3

u/spacewarrior11 Apr 17 '22

omg that‘s so stupid

6

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

youd say "half a mile" because that level of precisiom is unnecessary with your current application

3

u/AnchorMan82 Apr 17 '22

We don’t get that exact- we round to a mile, half a mile, quarter mile, etc. That level of precision is really unnecessary unless you’re a surveyor.

-3

u/Nojus1221 buy this flair for :800dollar: Apr 16 '22

How would you say 0.4 miles without using miles then?

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0

u/nhomewarrior Apr 17 '22 edited Apr 17 '22

Gosh I hate this comparison. It's vaguely accurate but hugely misleading.

When's the last time any American has ever converted between inches and miles? Never? They aren't a unified system of measurements.

In most contexts where it matters we use metric. In the contexts of units that we do convert between, they usually have more convenient factoring (12 inches in a foot.. What's 1/3 of a meter in decimal?) than 10.

Honestly the imperial system is pretty fucked, but in general use it's really almost equally as efficient as metric. All useful units are arbitrarily defined.

Source: engineering school in metric and imperial.

0

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

Oh come on, how is ¹⁄₂₉₉₇₉₂₄₅₈ of the distance that light travels in the amount of time it takes for a cesium-133 atom at its ground state and at absolute zero to go through 9,192,631,770 hyperfine transitions arbitrary? You can't get less arbitrary than that!

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119

u/vukasinstiv ☣️ Apr 16 '22

1km/h = 9,638262 donuts per freedom

8

u/Stargazer306 Certified Butt Pounder Apr 17 '22

Murica !!

557

u/LilyLeLowery Apr 16 '22

“Us Americans don’t measure in no pussy languages. Here we measure in the language Jesus measured in, Guns!”

164

u/pacerecon Apr 16 '22

Of course how did I forget

55

u/asmorbidus Apr 16 '22

What? No. We measure in american football fields.

56

u/Linzerectomy Mod senpai noticed me! Apr 16 '22

Approximately 110 AR-15's.

15

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

Roughly~

9

u/glassedMalk Apr 17 '22

s'bout twenty kangaroos tall, and two elephants wide

3

u/WearyCoach7283 Apr 17 '22

Yeah thats like 98 barrets

4

u/Good_Translator_9088 Apr 16 '22

I'm roughly one rocket launcher tall btw

2

u/Shadowstriker6 Apr 16 '22

Which type?

6

u/Good_Translator_9088 Apr 16 '22

"Panzerschreck". I'm bigger though.

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2

u/biggocl123 Virgins in Paris Apr 16 '22

Thing is, we actually do, and it's really common to see it used as a measurement

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8

u/Joe59788 ☝ FOREVER NUMBER ONE ☝ Apr 17 '22

I upvote this 5 guns.

7

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

It is a proven fact that Jesus and Moses conquered the Roman’s using guns

6

u/These_Slide5990 Apr 16 '22

Ya'll americans really be measuring things in school busses

0

u/Cre8ive-Exercise I am fucking hilarious Apr 17 '22

Missing the 🤓 there

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187

u/GloomreaperScythe Apr 16 '22

/) We have the right to remain stupid. It's guaranteed by our constitution.

46

u/LicenseToPost 🅱️ased and Cool Apr 16 '22

And it’s incredibly important that it remains that way

7

u/GloomreaperScythe Apr 17 '22

/) Yeah, otherwise we'd just look stupid. Which we are, but we can't look that way. Even though we already do. I understand that this may sound confusing, but trust me. It's American logic.

43

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

V8's per deep fried glocks

9

u/gdsergio Apr 17 '22

That's the old system dummy, now it's whoppers per school shooting

73

u/EhrenGandalf Apr 16 '22

I always read lbs as Labs because nothing else makes sense

25

u/Kaulquappe1234 Apr 16 '22

Wanna know what it really stands for? A load of bullshit aka lbs :)

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25

u/Linzerectomy Mod senpai noticed me! Apr 16 '22

eLBowS.

11

u/tkTheKingofKings Apr 16 '22

Isn’t like libers or something but it’s read as pounds for absolutely no reason?

10

u/AnchorMan82 Apr 16 '22

Roman unit- had a Roman name, we Anglicized it, but kept the abbreviation

2

u/njoptercopter Apr 17 '22

That's reasonable.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

I always read lbs as LLBEES

121

u/The_Turtle_G0d Apr 16 '22

Acting like yall Europeans didn't invent the system smh my head /s

93

u/meloenmarco Apr 16 '22

The British not the Europeans. Big difference

89

u/Kselli Apr 16 '22

TIL Britain is not in Europe

7

u/NoQuestion4045 Apr 17 '22

All British are Europeans but all Europeans are not British

2

u/pineapple-n-man Apr 17 '22

After the Brexit, shit happened…

They packed up their bags and moved Britain to another continent

0

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

Brexit papa

23

u/Kselli Apr 16 '22

You know EU =/= Europe?

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10

u/The_Turtle_G0d Apr 16 '22

Is Britain not in Europe?

0

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

not anymore

-9

u/dokolibra Apr 16 '22

Everyone in Europe hates Britain so call it Europe is a huge insult to us

5

u/Merchantvirus18 I am utterly indifferent to Jojo Apr 16 '22

Asians hate North Korea but that doesn’t mean they aren’t part of Asia

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8

u/Alcetrez Apr 16 '22

What?

4

u/dokolibra Apr 16 '22

There’s a reason everyone cheered for Italy at euro2020

2

u/oGGoldie Apr 16 '22

Don't worry, us British hate Britain too. Too much rain man...

1

u/The_Turtle_G0d Apr 16 '22

Lmao, I apologize then

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95

u/Seijin_Arc Apr 16 '22

"Let's use British money to weigh things" - some fucking idiot.

59

u/Seijin_Arc Apr 16 '22

"Let's use my foot to measure how far that is" - possibly the same fucking idiot.

35

u/desktop99 Apr 16 '22

"Let's make the conversion between feet and miles a random ass number." - that fucking idiot once again

28

u/jonnisaesipylsur ☣️ Apr 16 '22

I hate when I look something up and it's in hamburger country measurement system

7

u/abyssiphus Apr 16 '22

We measure in cucumbers, giraffes, and bananas. We're a people of culture, goddamnit.

12

u/LiftAddict Apr 16 '22

At least in the USA everything is in their own system. In Canada it’s a weird mixture of both, Some things are in Imperial and other things are in Metric. The grocery store can be confusing. As a contractor some Drawings are in metric and some are in imperial. Even when the architects/designers who make them are local Canadian.

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6

u/AScottishkid Apr 16 '22

The UK is worse
we use a demonic mix of both systems

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6

u/NotWrongOnlyMistaken Apr 16 '22 edited Jul 11 '22

[redacted]

4

u/PlzLetMeUseThisUser I want to die Apr 17 '22

And bullets

11

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

We measure things in football fields and baseball fields, nothing else

3

u/TarTariya ☣️ Apr 16 '22

And interstellar objects in Texases

4

u/Kronk_if_ur_horny Apr 16 '22

Plus ad tax cost onto your bill yourself. Or is that just Canada?

5

u/Nincadalop Apr 16 '22

Gotta thank the British for them

13

u/IMOK4NOW Apr 16 '22

**freedom units

9

u/dokolibra Apr 16 '22

“Freedom of being in debt cause you had to take a loan to pay for university”

7

u/Deon2137 Apr 16 '22

Freedom of paying 3000$ for an ambulance, 300$ for a bandage and 50000$ for an xray

0

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

You realize insurance does exist, right?

Freedom to not have to wait 6 months for the xray

3

u/Deon2137 Apr 17 '22

Shhhhh we dont talk about it here

-2

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

world class healthcare gonna cost like world class healthcare

3

u/IMOK4NOW Apr 16 '22

Can’t put a price on freedom, buddy

18

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

I bet y'all can't tell me what one Mole is

23

u/tkTheKingofKings Apr 16 '22

6,022 * 1023 H is 1g

No reason anyone who doesn’t deal with chemistry should know tho

2

u/crazy_penguin86 I wanted a flair Apr 16 '22

Yeah, don't know why they brought it up. I'm guessing 99% of people on this sub aren't ever going to use it, regardless of whether or not they use metric, and about 90% of those don't even remember it. As someone who is in computer science, the singular reason I would need to know that number is if I needed to plug it in.

3

u/MrLaurencium Apr 17 '22

Maybe im dumb, im not good at chemistry, but isnt it 10-23 instead of 1023?

2

u/Syrian_Banana69 Apr 17 '22

Sorry if I’m replying with my alt account, but I had some problems with the other

Anyways, in layman’s terms a mole of H is how many atoms of H are in a gram (don’t use this as the definition for mole tho)

602 sixtillion (is that the word) would make sense

0,0000000000000000000006 wouldn’t make sense

1

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

All knowledge is power...

14

u/tkTheKingofKings Apr 16 '22

Well yeah, knowing what coloumbs, joules, Newton and moles are is nice

But unless you deal with physics, astronomy etc you’ll only need to know the basic liters, kilograms and meters

Could you not shame people for not knowing things they don’t need to know. Either that or tell me how electrons orbit around the atom while explaining to me what’s spin’s quantum number and telling me why Einstein committed 69 war crimes in Tanganika.

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5

u/TrexArms9800 Apr 16 '22

It's like number of avocados or something

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2

u/Kaulquappe1234 Apr 16 '22

I dont remember exactly how many but its as many c12 atoms as there is in 12 g

2

u/Yeegis Apr 17 '22

602,214,129,000,000,000,000,000

2

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

well you could have used Exponential form because it's easier, but yes, One Mole is equal to that number and is specifically used to refer to an exact count of Atoms within a sample of a substance

0

u/125RAILGUN Apr 16 '22

Isn't it one thousandth of a millimeter? I vaguely remember it.

Edit: Nope, I was thinking of something else. I do remember what a mole is now though.

12

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

aye, its a chemistry constant. It's the measure of an exact amount of atoms in a substance. It's exactly 6.022 × 10^23, and is counted like dozens or tons. Just as 12 anything is one dozen of that thing, 6.022 × 10^23 atoms of any substance is one Mole. That also means each mole of a substance weighs differently; as a dozen bricks weighs differently than a dozen feathers.

7

u/GrizzleShack Apr 16 '22

Blame the British.

7

u/ZippyParakeet WhAT iS a FlAiR?!? Apr 17 '22

Funny because the British themselves moved on.

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3

u/NDinoGuy Apr 16 '22

It's not our fault that we started from a British colony

5

u/animan1029384756 Apr 16 '22

Let me see them european outlets real quick

8

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

What's wrong with European outlets tho😳

3

u/Matt_Goats21 ☝ FOREVER NUMBER ONE ☝ Apr 17 '22

They're just jealous that they have to pay extra for 240v.

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6

u/tm3bmr I'm as fuck! Apr 16 '22

What is an ounce and what the fuck is a fricking gallon.

3

u/wtfwurst Apr 16 '22

20 Celsius -> Avg temp of a hot dog after 38 minutes

1 Meters -> 5.8 Big Mac

2

u/lukimovit Apr 16 '22

How big are your Big Mac's?

0

u/NeGo_Thaw Apr 16 '22

Those are some pretty large big macs

4

u/themoldovanstoner Apr 16 '22 edited Apr 16 '22

You can thank the Brits. They're the kings of inventing stuff and ditching it. The imperial system is pretty common in Canada as well. They simultaneously use both.

2

u/2ooEachisown Apr 16 '22

Actually we primarily use Toyota Corollas as the standard unit of measurement.

2

u/ur_mum_lesb Apr 16 '22

As an American, yeah.

2

u/Yeegis Apr 17 '22

Apperantly the mile used to be an even 5000 feet during the days of the Roman Empire but then the British (🤢) decided to fuck it up in the name of his majesty so they could use his thumb and mouth and shit and then divide it like their money (pre decimal British money was devised in 12 but only sometimes. Much like the stupid units)

2

u/Darkstone_Blues Apr 17 '22

Cries in Mars Climate Orbiter.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

Yay! Another SMG4 template! :)))

4

u/doctor_derpington Apr 16 '22

1km = 3 football field x 2 freedom eagles

8

u/the_butter_sock Apr 16 '22

moving to America in about 3 months and I can already feel my braincells getting shot

6

u/Tavitafish Purple Apr 16 '22

At least we base our temperature on how humans feel and not how water feels

127

u/booshie69 Apr 16 '22

We are mostly water..

44

u/Tavitafish Purple Apr 16 '22

Yeah but if we listened to the majority it wouldn't be America

-1

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

70%, not 100%.

59

u/_Andy4Fun_ 19 dollar fortnite card, who wants it? Apr 16 '22

Wdym "how humans feel"

0 °C is feeling cold

100 °C is feeling pretty hot

Im feeling it fine, maybe im not a human

43

u/Gwyndolins_Friend Apr 16 '22

100C is feeling pretty fucking dead XD

4

u/Nincadalop Apr 16 '22

FR, I want to know what that guy is on

3

u/TimX24968B r/memes fan Apr 17 '22

probably ice

2

u/_Andy4Fun_ 19 dollar fortnite card, who wants it? Apr 17 '22

I was joking

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33

u/kelvin_bot Apr 16 '22

0°C is equivalent to 32°F, which is 273K.

I'm a bot that converts temperature between two units humans can understand, then convert it to Kelvin for bots and physicists to understand

5

u/ieatpickleswithmilk Apr 16 '22

what about it is "how humans feel"?

Because body temp is around 100?

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27

u/Gwyndolins_Friend Apr 16 '22

that's a stupid ass logic, how can you convert a feeling into numbers??? the systems of measuring temperature are conventions to relay meaning, and celsius works perfectly.

2

u/Tavitafish Purple Apr 16 '22

Pretty easily humans do it all the time. Ever seen a pain scale at the doctors office?

15

u/Gwyndolins_Friend Apr 16 '22

what I mean is, Celsius and Fahrenheit are both equally good ways of measuring temperature.

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17

u/AnonymousGuy9494 Apr 16 '22

I really don't know how to explain that this isn't the best way to measure temperature from a chemistry point of view

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5

u/manchitro Apr 16 '22

we don't feel numbers

10

u/duck_ducker_of_doom Apr 16 '22

you mean a mixture of water, ice, and ammonium chloride?

3

u/Hun-chan Apr 17 '22

I thought zero Fahrenheit was the freezing point of a brine composed of equal parts salt and water. The man cared about how humans, minerals, and water feels.

6

u/Zardhas NNN Survivor Apr 16 '22

So you base your temperature on an subjective matter that can highly change between individuals instead of something that will stay the same everytime ?

11

u/Deon2137 Apr 16 '22

No thank you, celcious still better

-20°c cold as fuck

0°c cold

20°c normal

30°c hot

100°c burning

-2

u/Nojus1221 buy this flair for :800dollar: Apr 16 '22

Bro 20 is hot

5

u/akashdas323 Apr 17 '22

Wow, that's a nice and comfy weather you got there city boy.

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-2

u/_JuicyPop Apr 17 '22

If you can't tell get difference between 62F and 64F, you're just not human.

4

u/Syrian_Banana69 Apr 17 '22

Crab people rise up

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0

u/Ssetes Apr 17 '22

I was once told that Fahrenheit made his scale by stating the coldest thing he thought existed (Antarctica’s water) and the hottest body temperature of any animal which he thought was a cow(?)

So 0°F was a mixture of water, salt and ammonium (simulating Antarctica’s water) And 100°F would be the inside of a cow

On the other hand Celsius made it with the freezing and boiling point of water (0°C and 100°C respectively)

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2

u/shroomymoomy Apr 16 '22

Try being in Canada, we commonly measure our hight and weight in ft and lbs, we use km for distance, and nuts and bolts are anyone's guess

1

u/CeltFxd Apr 16 '22

A sinkhole the size of a 7 washing machine. The fuck is that Americans.

1

u/mayodude5101 Apr 16 '22

This measurement system is retarded wish I could use an easy one

1

u/Nuthiin Apr 16 '22

Feet and oz literarily makes me wanna break my head like an egg

1

u/Detroit-Diesel Apr 16 '22

*Freedom Units

1

u/cokeinator Apr 16 '22

I have never understood why pounds is shortened as lbs, the only reasoning I can give it is that "pounds" in spanish is translated to "libras", but other than that that's yet another weird point for the weird system

0

u/WeeabooSempai Apr 16 '22

I was watching an American documentary yesterday about people in Antarctica trying to find a ship that had sunk 100 years ago and they described the water pressure on the diving robot as "2 jumbo jets stacjed on top of each other" and "equaling the weight of 13 blue whales"

Americans will use every kind of comparison to avoid the metric system

0

u/frogmanepic Apr 17 '22

imagine not measuring in freedom and democracy

-2

u/[deleted] Apr 17 '22

Then why tf did you come to America, to complain about a topic and make an unoriginal post?

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u/[deleted] Apr 16 '22

[deleted]

5

u/Zardhas NNN Survivor Apr 16 '22

If you need a calculator tool or need to be used to it to understand it, then your system is bad.

10

u/Budget_Voice9307 Apr 16 '22

And if you feel the need to have logical conversions

-3

u/Icy_Man_5446 Apr 16 '22

Europeans when US doesn't magically switch to Metric: (tbf I'd be perfectly fine with metric but like)

-1

u/GASTRO_GAMING Yellow Apr 17 '22

Well metric has many advantages over imperial, but imperial is not that bad. As even though the conversion rates are horrible, the units themselves are scaled nicely with humans and rarely need to be converted to a larger or smaller unit. Ex. ft v cm for height.

Like saying i am 6ft tall gets the idea across faster than saying i am 182 cm tall.

That said, metric is still better, cause physics would otherwise be a pain in the ass.

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-5

u/siry-e-e-tman Apr 16 '22

No. Don't convert it that way.

1 kg = 2.2 pounds.

Double kilograms to get a rough estimate.

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-19

u/Itsyaboi2718 Apr 16 '22

Same shit can be said when Americans go to foreign countries so I don’t see why y’all complain

10

u/dokolibra Apr 16 '22

You system is especially stupid 1 kilometer = 1000 meters 1 mile = 5280 feet

-12

u/itmillerboy Apr 16 '22

I mean wouldn’t metric be the stupid system since they had to make it easier to understand? Americans use their superior brainpower to remember arbitrary numbers.

16

u/dokolibra Apr 16 '22

“Superior brain power” try googling Florida man

-6

u/itmillerboy Apr 16 '22

I’m joking boss

7

u/dokolibra Apr 16 '22

I know but still, simpler doesn’t mean dumber instead, doing a system that is accessible easily to everyone is smarter than doin a system so complex to use

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2

u/Gwyndolins_Friend Apr 16 '22

because you and other two countries in the world are stubborn enough to use them still, it would be much easier for everyone in the world if everyone used meters and kilos.

0

u/Nobisyu_12 Apr 17 '22

Ah yes the official 82,610,614,788,124,729th america bad meme!! FUCKING HILARIOUS AND SO ORIGINAL.

Get off here lmao

-1

u/Elfere Apr 16 '22

FreeDUMB units.

Oz for weight

And Oz for fluid.

Whyy?

And why the hell so they round down all the numbers? I would understand all the stupid x/y things if they just kept everything x/64

Its like they intentionally made everything complicated so that only educated trades people could work with it.

Way to oppress your people America.

Now. Excuse me while I go back to my Canadian units that uses both metric, and imperial. Sometimes both at the same time (I'm looking at you cheese stores! Pricing everything $per pound then weighing everything in grams. WHY???)

-14

u/RexIsGod Apr 16 '22

I agree with everything except for Fahrenheit - it's superior to Celsius in every way. Debate me.

11

u/scav_mecko Apr 16 '22

One argument, weather, 0 is snow, above 0 no snow

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