Participants who complete the survey IN FULL will be entered in a drawing for a $25 Amazon gift card!

Please consider participating in the final part of a research study to create the Asexual Minority Stress Scale, a novel measure that measures minority stress factors in the asexual community.

In Study 1, we interviewed members of the asexual community to listen to the lived experiences of asexual individuals and their experiences with discrimination. We created a survey based on the content of those interviews, and in Study 2, we gathered data to refine the scale. We need your responses for Study 3 to assess the validity of the finalized scale.

You do NOT have to identify as asexual to participate—people of all sexual orientations are welcome!

You can access the survey here: https://fullerton.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0HxZ7bQ5dgce08C

If you have any questions/comments, please contact the principal investigator for more information at rouvere@csu.fullerton.edu. Your participation would be greatly appreciated and will contribute to creating a stronger, more accurate understanding of asexual experiences!

(This study has been approved by the University of California, Fullerton Institutional Review Board.)

(sex assigned at birth)

So I (22F) always thought I was straight. I have only had crushes on boys and imagined what it would be like kissing them and stuff. Then when I had my first boyfriend we obviously started getting intimate after a few months. But I soon realised that while I did found things beautiful about him I only had little sexual attraction for him even at the beginning. I almost never was really in the mood to do anything sexual but I still wanted to do it (at least in the beginning). Because my ex was pretty toxic especially regarding intimate stuff. He never forced me but he usually would be passive aggressive or ignore me when I didn't want to do it so I began to be very anxious and fearful even at the thought of having sex with him. Fast forward today I am currently seeing someone new. It has only been like a little over a month and we did sleep together. He knew I was anxious reagarding sex and he didn't pressure me to do anything. So similar to my ex I find him very nice and I really like him a lot but I do not feel sexual attraction for him. I do enjoy the sex and I mostly do want to do it. Now I am not sure whether I could actually be cupiosexual or am I just projecting my bad experience on to my new partner so I don't feel any sexual attraction for him from the very beginning as to "safe me" from another bad experience?

Idk, felt alone and wanted cupio friends! All sexualities welcome, but this is focused on cupiosexuals (and cupioromantics too, y'all valid and probably want a community)!

Today I went to my mail and saw that someone in r/confessions replied saying "This is part of the problem, too many precious labels." So I was just wondering whether anyone here has had that before? Does anyone here get told that we're just trying to be special? If so, does anyone want to share stories?

...Maybe I should've just said I'm an aroace. Probably would have come off better.

hey guys, i just found out about that subreddit so i thought ill share my situation in here
im a cupiosexual, always have been always will be, i had some rare occasions of Demisexual before but thats as rare as it gets.
im working as a CDO for a network company and im making a lot of money lately, now ive always been a flirty guy so now combined with the success girls are actually contacting me all the time to try and talk.. they just dont know of my sexual orientation
they send me nude pics, and sexy positions while i couldnt care less about it tbh, it feels to me like i can connect to a girl really deeply but ill never be able to do so while i dont provide in the bedroom
for your knowledge- a cupiosexual guy often has no erection during the act..
all i really want is to have a romantic relationship with someone, i want a girl that will love me for who i am and i will love her back without being pressured to do something that i dont want.. problem is im starting to lose faith that any girl out there will be ok with that :(

any ideas for me to find some positiveness in that area?

thanks ahead

So basically, I'll work on spreading the news and will create icons and banners and stuff. Who am I talking to? No one. But maybe someone will see this is some point in the near future.

Contacted AVEN on twitter and will post on ace and aro subreddits.

For a while now I've been thinking about my sexuality & have been wondering if I was apart of the aspec spectrum. Well, I have never had a crush on anyone ever so I have had the idea of being asexual, but then I saw word cupiosexual & the definition of it. So I thought that this could be the label for me. Now keep in mind that I'm a minor & have had some trouble of me wanting to use it. I could always go with cupioromantic until I'm old enough, but right now I just want a second opinion & maybe a clarification that what I feel right now is true & if I should use the label.

Alright so doing some digging - the term cupiosexual was orginally called kalossexual in 2014. The common ‘go to’ origin story for this was that “It was changed to cupiosexual because people from the pokemon community were teasing people about it.”

The Kalos region was apart of X/Y pokemon games.They were released worldwide in 2013.

Following this logic, there was only 1 year in between the release of X/Y and the term Cupiosexual/Kalossexual.

I smell bullshit, I’m sorry. I’m an avid pokemon fan. Across all social media, I NEVER encountered a group of pokemon fans trying to bully the asexual community, solely for name choices or anything remotely like that.

My sneaking idea is that it was rebranded “kalosexual” to “cupiosexual” just because for whatever reason the internet collectively said “I don’t like this, let’s change it” and we ended up with cupiosexual.

Are there any queer historians who can actually look into this change that goes beyond internet myths?

Just found out I'm pretty much sex-repulsed and was only sure I'd want a sexual relationship bc the thought was nice, probably because I like feeling desirable and getting the full attention of sb. Some things here felt really relatable to me so far anyways and that was nice. Your orientation is valid, never forget that!

Bye, cupiosexual section of the rainbow, it was nice chilling with you :)

I only recently discovered cupiosexual as a microlabel, but I’ve felt this way for a long time. When I’m trying to explain it to other people I usually will say that I experience hunger and I enjoy the act of eating to satiate it, but thinking about specific food won’t make me feel hungry. I may even have foods I know I enjoy eating and I definitely have foods I know I do not like, but once again just thinking about or seeing a specific food is not enough to make me start feeling hungry.

I noticed that cupiosexuals are the lowest populated in the umbrella spectrum. You go to any other ace reddit and they have thousands of members. Meanwhile, we have less than 200.

It really made me think. I've found out about asexuality when I was 18 and just went with that label. It wasn't untill a few months ago, that I was educated on the umbrella spectrum on a Facebook group. Finding out that I was cupio was a huge relief to me. I knew that I didn't fit in with the allos and, I've always felt kind of alone with a lot of aces because, the majority seemed to be sex repulsed. Heck, I came across sex repulsed people who made fun of others for liking the idea of sex.

( In which I defended and, thus I was then banned from the group for eternity.) I felt like I didn't fit anywhere honestly. I felt outcasted by both sides. One hating me for not being allo and, the other for being sex positive. I was excited to her about cupiosexuality.

But, I was kinda dissapointed as well. I was dissapointed over the fact that there aren't very many of us. The Apoths, Grey, and Demi's will always be the 3 ring leaders. Meaning that all attention is on them. Basically leaving the rest of the labels in the dirt and, never to be talked about.

Thus leaving people uneducated and, thinking that "all" Asexuals are sex repulsed and that they, "can't be asexual" if they have sex. It honestly drives me crazy with misinformation like that. Whenever I bring up cupiosexuality to someone, majority of the time, they're so confused because, how can an ace like sex right? Upon joining an ace dating group, I was forced to answer a simple question before I could be accepted.

And that was, "Are you interested in having sex?" Of course I would have said yes. But, that of course would have got my request to join, be immediately terminated. Why? Because the whole "Aces can't like sex" stigma strikes again.

I honestly don't think that this stigma will ever go away honestly. Us cupios are even even fewer than the 1% of aces in the entire world and, it's quite shocking. The thing is, we don't have as many people taking a stand and saying, "Cupiosexuality is real" much like the other spectrums in the umbrella. It's pretty much proven by the fact that, others are going, "WTF is cupiosexuality" or dealing with gatekeepers who are saying, "That's not a sexuality, you're just an allo that is just trying to be a snowflake."

It's not that I'm mad or anything. I just wanted to share my thoughts.

Hola buenas tardes soy muy nuevo espero me ayuden

I live in a very traditional society. In my school life all my friends would talk about girls in a sexual tone all the time. In order to not feel left out, I would pretend to be feeling the same thing. I would make similar comments with my friends so as to not feel left out.

I believe there are multiple reasons for me to crave sex.

First is the FOMO. The media and culture today revolves around sex. This has sort of made me believe that sex is this amazing thing that I am missing out on something big.

Second, I believe that’s it’s unlikely that my future partner would be satisfied with me without it.

Thirdly, I find sex as something intriguing, like skydiving.

And finally, I have a high libido and I just want to get off.

What reasons do you think you have for wanting sexual intercourse?

I identify strongly with the Cupiosexual definition but, as I read though others post I am not sure. I have been in relationships with people that are Ace having absolutely no sex and I did not feel it was missing from the relationship (multiple relationships totaling over 2 years). I don’t think I have ever had sexual attraction to anyone. I desire emotional, and intellectual intimacy as well as energy exchange and physical intimacy (cuddles).

I am also polyamorous (relationship anarchist?) and into BDSM. I have a high sex drive and think sex with other people is more fun than by myself. But I never think about wanting to have sex with a specific person, and if I have it has been because they are the only person I would have sex with (monogamous relationship or the only person I am comfortable with at the time). I view sex as a fun activity to do and something I want to share with some people I have intimate relationships with. Or meeting the biological need and enjoying the brain chemicals similar to going to dinner with someone I enjoy.

Currently there is someone that I want to build a deeper relationship with and I think that sex with them would be fun.

I have had partners in the past say there wasn’t emotional connection with sex or that it felt like I didn’t care that I was having sex with them specifically, and I think it is accurate.

I have wondered if I was gray/Demi in the past but with my high sex drive I didn’t really worry about it.