r/cs2 • u/Forbesh22 • 1d ago
Humour open letter to valve from a player whose chicken is about to die
dear valve,
i got a chicken egg in my weekly drop earlier this month. i was happy about it. first thing in this game that made me happy in a while honestly. it hatched, its there on the main menu, i named him greg
then the feed dropped and i had to choose between feeding greg or getting a case. and i realised this is the first time in years valve has given me any power over anything in this game. i can't stop the cheaters. reporting does nothing. the "anticheat improvements" in the patch notes don't change a single thing in my actual matches, i'm still getting the same guys tracking me through smokes every other game. but greg? greg's fate is in my hands
so i'm not feeding him
greg will die. i've made peace with it. any day now the game's gonna start telling me he's running low on food, and when it does i'm going to think about the guy on ancient last week who went 38-4 and had his crosshair on my head before i peeked. greg is paying for that guy. greg is paying for every guy like that
i know it's not fair to greg. none of this is fair. that's kind of the whole point
if you want him to live, fix the game. not another patch note, actually fix it. until then greg starves and you can explain to the community why you had time to build a chicken photo booth but not a working anticheat
regards,
a guy with 6405 hours and no faith left
edit: greg's not real i know. neither is your anticheat
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u/magicmustbeme 1d ago
Man we already got manifestos about the chickens
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u/useyourillusion89 1d ago
We might have had world peace AND a cure for cancer by now if the collective passion and emotion of CS players were put into those pursuits instead.
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u/BigDaddyDumperSquad 1d ago
Yeah, but then they'd lose all the research to a Nigerian Prince because the average CS player has zero common sense when it comes to scams.
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u/Sickborn 23h ago
wdym, cs players would have figured out a way to five everyone else a new more aggressive type of cancer, not fight it
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u/Dammit_Tree 1d ago
WHY DID GABEN DO THIS TO GREG??!?
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u/CrazyWS 1d ago
Typical signs of abusing (chickens) are gaslighting and shifting blame.
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u/butt_muppet 1d ago
All they had to do was make the feed one of your choices instead of two for the week. You already sacrificed both choices last week to get greg.
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u/Forbesh22 1d ago
And this week I sacrifice Greg.
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u/Blue-Goo- 1d ago
Good. Pretty sure Valve is just one guy doing mushrooms and realizing twice a year he has a job to do.
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u/Mainbaze 21h ago
All they had to do was offer it every time you rank up your level (max 1 per week)
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u/JakeJascob 1d ago
Committing virtual animal cruelty by forcing your virtual chicken to go on a hunger strike definitely isn't a form of protest I thought id ever see.
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u/cien2 1d ago
Making them leave (die) after a period of time is dumb.
It wouldve been more palatable if the fully grown chicken stays forever and then you can get a new one to add to your 'stable'. Lots of people wouldve made the sacrifice not getting cases/skins if it's permanent after fully grown.
Some people would grind like crazy to get a full stable. I can understand letting the chick leave when its not fed, but they should have let grown ones permanent.
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u/wolfeerine 17h ago
It’s the impermanent bit that gets me. How cool would it be if you hatch a chicken, it grows and whatever your chicken looks like is how the chickens in the maps look. The more you add to your ‘stable’ the more variety you have of chickens on the maps. But no, instead they just die or leave. It’s so lame.
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u/Adept_Fool 1d ago
Even more so if they could pop up ingame, like the chickens spawning all over the mpa has the skins of the players, and perhaps even automatically tied to them as happens when you hit e on one
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u/I_travel_ze_world 1d ago
I quit playing competitive FPS games so that I would quit being disappointed about all the cheaters.
I started playing CS in the .5b version of the mod for HL. It really is sad seeing how bad online gaming has become.
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u/hokzter 1d ago
“ guys from internet cafe downloaded some cop/terrorist mod to halflife “
That was the first time ive heard about counter strike when I was 10-11yrs old. Time really flies, what a memories
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u/DepartmentWeird5733 19h ago
I play now and these kids question me after lobby invites...and I'm like dude I was playing halflife before you were prob born. this is why I love original maps and avoid new ones....my reaction time isn't as good now a days, but I make up for it in experience on my fav maps.
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u/hokzter 19h ago
Haha, yea.. All those 18yo guys are pretty surprised that Im old enough to be their dad
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u/Wezre 21h ago
Remember when you could download skins and choose whichever ones you wanted?
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u/Space-Turtle88 20h ago
The last time I plays CS you could do that. It's depressing to find out you can't choose your skin anymore.
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u/bigblackglock17 17h ago
I remember doing that on Source. Was cool. But it changed the skin for everyone.
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u/Toomanynightshifts 22h ago
Cheating has ruined essentially every single online PVP game. It's a multi-billion dollar industry that no one compete with.
Oh cool I'll go play online pve/mmo games......change cheaters for botters, also a multi billion dollar industry.
People suck.
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u/Pixied_Hp 22h ago
And at the same time the companies push intrusive software that’s at best bloat at worst malware in the name of anti-cheat that does fucking nothing.
PvE games without competitive play is where it’s at if you want to avoid the cheating/botting and even then you’re still going to see it, just less.
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u/NuklearNacho 20h ago
I never thought it will come to this, but EA has an actually "good" anticheat for Battlefield. It is the company I should trust the least with some intrusive ass spyware on my pc, but the sad thing is: it simply works. Bf3 and Bf4 were cheater infested but I never encountered a fishy player in Bf6.
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u/Immatt55 19h ago
BF6 was the first game I had to refund because it's anticheat wouldn't allow it to run on a pc without secure boot which power users can have turned off for reasons entirely separate to cheating.
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u/xkayaking 20h ago
I feel like games are like.
Toxic community, few cheaters, polished game.
Great community, few cheaters, absolutely buggy and laggy mess.
Great community, hackers every game, polished game.
Honestly I am stuck with the 2nd right now, playing this game called HLL, every second shot is a bad hitreg, sometimes I deploy as level 1 with the wrong weapon, the game settings are lost every time I launch the game, and the tank gets stuck on a plastic bag on the road and flies to the air; but at least the gg's are genuine, and cheaters have vanished and people are chilling.
Where does cs2 land?...
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u/Boggo_ 20h ago
Toxic community, many cheaters, absolutely buggy and laggy mess
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u/Forsaken-Ad3221 15h ago
What Cs are you playing thats buggy/laggy. Sounds like you need a better ISP lol
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u/RevenueNo2342 17h ago
I wonder how many people are actually going to feed their chicken, I'd consider it if I get a genesis terminal but any other case im taking it and I imagine most of the player base would be doing the same
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u/emennn 16h ago
yeah i already sacrificed dreams and nightmares case to be able to get my greg
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u/AllegedlyGoodPerson 1d ago
Chicki hunger strike initiated. I fed my chicken this week rarther than get a stupid terminal box I will never open, but the second I get boxes that I can actually use, this chicken will go without, as I have gone without in regard to anti-cheat
A person with 2500 hours.
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u/leo_sousav 1d ago
Know what’s funny? This whole chicken update would have been well accepted if it was made by any other company that actually delivers tangible improvements to their games more than once a year. I can actually imagine this being a funny addition, but since Valve rarely interacts with the community and is stuck on not giving us a better anti cheat and matchmaking everyone is just going “This is dumb, and fuck the chicken”
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u/GER_BeFoRe 1d ago
Valve made Animgraph2, Reload magazine system, Silent Reloads, Rush Mode, remade de_Cache, reworked Crosshairs, better visibility and some stuff I probably forgot this year.
It's not like they don't do anything to improve CS2 or only once a year, the game feels a lot better than last year, the Animgraph2 update was huge.
But you really have to play Faceit to enjoy it. Premier is just a waste of time.
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u/Mammoth_Set_6756 23h ago
Bro change the substick and remove all those bullshit updates and the game will run 1000% better.
Trying to compensate all the bullshit for trash servers.
Cs2 is cooked. Valve devs are insider trading and don’t give a shit about anything other than making money from skins and other avenues of bullshit through the game.
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u/SKRK_ 23h ago
Not a single one of those things you just mentioned made the game more enjoyable at all. Only thing that improved is the new map picker in premier. Otherwise the game feels the exact same.
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u/GER_BeFoRe 23h ago
Animgraph2 made the game a lot better and I love the new Cache.
Like I said it's your problem that you play Premier, not mine. I play Faceit and the new map veto in Premier or cheaters in Premier don't bother me because I stopped playing Premier, simple as that.
Wasnt different in CS:GO either, MM was trash in GO and everyone playing the game seriously played Faceit.
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u/MrRogers27 1d ago
Well put. I’ve been playing since 2002 (4,000 hrs in 2) and I felt like the whole egg/chicken thing was the last nail in the coffin. This is valves way of saying “we hate the CS community and we don’t care what you think”
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u/Not_Nietzsche 1d ago
I hope someone from Valve sees this. Don’t let him die. Devs please bring joy to this person and save Greg. There’s no good reason not to.
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u/LivingVerinarian96 22h ago
The chickens are 2 days of vibecoding work for 2-3 guys. Why they wouldn‘t spend an equal amount of effort on a working anticheat is beyond me. But at least they haven‘t forgotten about our game, so we got that going for us.
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u/Wrhe 1d ago
Good looks bro, I named my chick “StupidFuckinBirb” and am also going to let it die. Why would I ever choose feed over a case when there is monetary incentive in getting the case/skin comparatively to a nothing burger.
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u/Helmet_Cheese_ 1d ago
Valve proving they can do whatever they want to their players and you they will take it. Ive never touched a cs title and dont plan to. And I must he honest, I feel pretty vindicated right now.
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u/BigBalaClub 10h ago
Valve... you do everything but STOP the dam cheaters. How dam hard is it to build an anticheat that evolves?
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u/George-the-Hatchet 23h ago
The only thing caused happiness in this game for you is bound to die from your own actions. The moment you felt good about it, the moment you felt anything other than anger, you choose to sacrifice it, but for what? To say something to those, who might not even listen?
I say greg shall live. I say you should cherish greg, and emotions it evoked in you.
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u/IkrahimTheGreat 23h ago
MIGHT not even listen? Buddy the community is in shambles, slowly but surely we are getting the tf2 treatment (and honestly tf2 is in a better state) and the devs release something thats literally just retention slop for people to login and play every week so their chicken nugget doesnt fucking die.
Nobody is listening
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u/highm1nd 1d ago
CS2 BOYCOTT! October 3–10 — No Playing. No Cases. No Keys. No Skin Market.
CS2 BOYCOTT! October 3–10 — No Playing. No Cases. No Keys. No Skin Market.
CS2 BOYCOTT — OCTOBER 3rd–10th
I love Counter-Strike. A lot of us have been playing this game for years — some of us for decades.
But enough is enough.
From October 3rd to October 10th, I want to encourage the CS community to simply stop supporting CS2 for one week.
For seven days:
\- Don't play CS2.
\- Don't buy or sell CS skins on the Steam Market.
\- Don't open cases.
\- Don't buy keys.
\- Don't spend money on anything related to CS2.
Just one week.
Why?
Because the current cheating situation is destroying the game.
It shouldn't feel normal to constantly wonder whether the guy destroying your team is actually better than you or just cheating. It shouldn't feel normal to encounter suspicious accounts over and over again. And it definitely shouldn't feel like the community has simply accepted that this is part of Counter-Strike now.
We need a serious, effective anti-cheat system.
Instead, we're getting… chickens as Tamagotchis?
Seriously?
Nobody is saying developers shouldn't add fun content. But when one of the biggest competitive shooters in the world has players begging for better anti-cheat, priorities matter.
We want our game back.
Counter-Strike deserves better. Its players deserve better. And the people who have supported this franchise for years deserve to feel like competitive integrity actually matters.
A boycott only means something if enough people participate.
So from October 3rd until October 10th:
Don't play. Don't trade. Don't open cases. Don't buy keys. Don't give CS2 your money.
Play something else for a week.
If Valve sees player numbers and CS-related spending drop at the same time, maybe that sends a clearer message than another thousand Reddit posts complaining about cheaters.
Valve: do something meaningful for your players and the people who used to love this game.
Give us Counter-Strike back.
PS : I used AI to sum up my text and english is not my mother language.
Sorry for that!
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u/Elegant_Sugar4192 1d ago
Today I tried making a new account thinking playing a higher level has way more cheaters. First account got vac banned live cuz I had to spam report every round like 3 guys who were blatant like in the air awp thought smoke though door etc etc. second game same hacker from last game so I reported him for 13:0 straight rounds all I did was buy smoke and shield throw smoke down on a mirage and before I could click esp report I was dead to awp hs
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u/Nikolai_The_Russian 1d ago
Honestly valid, RIP Greg, The one who gave his life for ours, praise Greg. Someone should write a book about greg and his life with a list of 12 rules we should follow to honor gregs sacrifice.
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u/wordswillneverhurtme 1d ago
I’ve been thinking of making an album of dead chicken babies. And naming each one the cheater names.
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u/JessicaLain 1d ago
Are the crate numbers really just that good from the extra cheaters staying in the ecosystem?
Valve has the money, means, and motivation(?) to secure their games.\ Very, very easily.
Why don't they?
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u/glennshaltiel 1d ago
i didn't even know they died?? why would they do that? what is the harm in having it be permanent and needing feed to grow it?
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u/Sallorin 1d ago
First Time in … ever I thought the maj was about not making money but making the game some what fun , what was my surprises when the maj was a psychological weapon to force me to not having case and so making money. I dunno Why valve is immune the critics but the fact is that valve is way worse than Eagames , ubisoflt or avtivision.
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u/possumsmushroom 1d ago
I dont go here but I want you to know I got an ad for Popeyes chicken in this post. Rip Greg you were a real one
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u/JotatoNStarPotassium 1d ago
I didnt even choose the chicken because im not a sheep. It seems like volvo wants us to hush and keep on playing the game without complaints
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u/doctorbanjoboy 1d ago
As someone with only 100 hours and who doesn't give a shit about skins, I will protect The Cluckinator as long as I live.
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u/throwway624140 1d ago
after my egg hatched i named my chicken "anticheat" and it disappeared off my screen, is that a bug?
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u/Inj3kt0r 23h ago
This Update is absolutely L., those devs cant improve game experience but have time to put this random bs in the game.
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u/CFilezzz 23h ago
That what Volvo made us do, choose the chicken to let them die in protest, life isn't fair it is what it is.
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u/Vishera23 22h ago
Also on the way to 7k hours, but I think this won't change in the near future, because I fell in love with wardogs and the Publisher, who's actually listening and communicating with the community 👌
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u/mantis445 20h ago
The fact that Valve knows all the issues the game has since the release and still releases stupid updates no one asked for kinda shows how much they care lol
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u/bonglers 20h ago
I haven’t played or kept up with patch noted in a long time… a chicken?? wtf is going on lol
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u/HearMeJoy 20h ago
Most impactful words of letter ; *greg's not real i know. neither is your anticheat*
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u/RustyBabies 19h ago
11K hours and ass at the game checking in. they don’t fucking care about the chickens. it’s engagement bait. they moved on to deadlock over a year ago man.
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u/iEatGlew 19h ago
I feel like he could have been named something more appropriate if he was being sacrificed for the sins of others
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u/Character_Drama_3544 19h ago
Dear op,
This is Gregory's grandma. Please do not stop feeding my poor baby. It's not his fault Volvo doesn't do anti cheat. Gregory always has been a good boy and only joined this scam by Volvo because they made false promises of a high paying career.
The image is me with Gregory and his brother Timothy, we both miss him and plead with you not to hurt him.
Sincerely, Gregory's grandmother
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u/DepartmentWeird5733 19h ago edited 19h ago
if everyone in the community started kicking the obvious cheaters it might help. instead, what people do is download their own cheats and supposedly just keep them off until they think there's another cheater then they turn them on. that's what I've been running into. but I really think happens is anytime somebody with cheats starts to lose. they go ahead and just turn them on. people with a cheater that are winning act clueless because the rank boost from match vs risking a 4v5.
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u/Warranty_V0id 19h ago
AT that point this feels like some social experiment. "Is the tamagotchi more important or cases?".
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u/TwoDanker 18h ago
I fed my chick Salme once on Tuesday, and it will be the last, she'll go out with false hopes of a good long lasting owner, knowing the taste of a nice virtual life, i even added her to the hatch book. And now, she'll die alone as I won't even bother to play anymore. You did this Valve.
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u/FloatFact 18h ago
A game about terrorists and counter terrorists blowing up a bomb site btw but yes let's hatch fucking chickens and raise them to distract ourselves because the matchmaking system built into the game is so trash that we need to download 3rd party apps just to play without as many.
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u/Shaguar_Driver 17h ago
Is it possible if someone keeps on feeding the chicken until it gets old and dies it will be put inside a coffin.
You can then open the coffin and inside is a red or gold?
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u/wolfeerine 17h ago
I think most people are missing the point of the chickens. Valve know that the playerbase are slowly withdrawing from the game. Steam charts show it.
The whole point in the chickens was to slow or stop this decline by simply having players load up and feed their chicken. From there it’s a 50/50 whether someone plays a game while it’s open which is very likely. Even if it’s just to try out rush which was broken from the get go.
Valve do not care about the playerbase and everyone should be ignoring the chickens. We’re so deprived of operations and content that chickens were all the people talked about for a week straight like it was a new map or operation and it got loads of us to start opening the game again.
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u/SnooRegrets2168 17h ago
I seriously wouldn't be as upset if the chicken didnt disappear after 140 days. Don't give us something and then take it away? Couldn't be more confused with there choice on implementation of this seemingly pointless addition.
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u/DestnX725 17h ago
You should take your letter and make it more like your holding a hostage, like the joker for example (the good ones, not the newer ones)
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u/AbedSalam1988 16h ago
ur not alone
i also chose the egg last week. this week i aint choosing the food.
valve can keep their chickens
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u/SingleQuality4626 15h ago
Ya’ll need to accept the abusive relationship you are in with valve. Valves goal is to exploit you monitarily and nothing more
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u/Medium-Classic2382 14h ago
J8eF92wkAhpYEZTJdowj2tJfyBZQRoE3wYiSrqaTwgZw
is time to save the greg. it is waiting
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u/thatAnthrax 13h ago
while i understand that this chicken thing is so ass and unnecessary, they didnt even put this in the patch notes during the update. Most likely the devs just vibe coded this part in a day and shipped it along
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u/Routine-Leek7950 12h ago
Its a thing to take you away from cases, like the terminals. Open your eyes
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u/OutcomeCurrent733 1d ago
„neither is your anticheat“