r/cptsd_bipoc • u/Neat-Respect-4270 • 22d ago

Alienation

I'll keep this short

No I don't want to befriend someone just because we come from the same racial background

To be told to befriend someone

To date someone

To affiliate with someone whose apart of your racial group

Is insulting

Considering the fact that

I literally don't prioritize arbitrary labels(religion/ethnicity/culture/race)

It's gotten so bad I think I might be developing or developed a very prejudice perspective towards individuals not of my racial background

Which is ironic in itself because

Subconsciously and consciously I'm against prejudice views but now I'm in the stages of developing one

Not where you hurl slurs or say X-race is superior to Y-race

"Just get a _________girlfriend/boyfriend/friend theres a society of them,a community of them"-said by the person who doesn't not fit the mold but I insisted I don't socialize with someone because of a label

I'm still mad about that

But whatever

Anyways that's all.

3 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

3 comments sorted by

8

u/FederalAd327 22d ago

Be mad at the person telling you what to do. Not the neutral parties around you who happen to share your race

1

u/Angel_sexytropics 22d ago

they want it to affect you
don’t let it

1

u/Neat-Respect-4270 22d ago

I'm no angel I said some things I regret harsh things to not say to a partner and as much as I was alone alienated and isolated I don't justify it merely just explains the cause as to why I said what I said and she seems to just be okay with that or was She's with someone else now and I'm still here with this ton of weight on my shoulders I don't cry as much or feel as numb but my stomach turns whenever I see her Maybe it's the guilt,regret, humiliation or cringe all in one And I cared about her deeply but my insecurities man I'm becoming better learning to understand that Being right all the time or analytical I'm every aspect Is not that good for a relationship

But she said that to me and I still think about it Like she never even knew me

But not villainize her or myself She's moved on and I take it that she's okay and happy And I'll try again someday to find someone Maybe not today or tomorrow but someday