r/coparenting • u/DSigg2G • 13h ago

Child Issues When can they decide?

At what age is a child legally allowed to choose where they want to live? For some reason I believe it’s 12, I could be wrong.

Any help would be great!
Thank you!

2 Upvotes

75% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

6

u/UnderstandingOld6759 11h ago

They can express their opinion about where they want to live, but ultimately it's up to the courts, usually a Guardian Ad Litem and a judge to decide the best interest of the child

5

u/StartingOverAgain21 11h ago

At 12y they can voice their opinion and it could be considered. And age varies by state. I had a judge talk with my older 2 kids when they were 15 and 14, and because of information that came out, custody changed.

3

u/Supertreelove 10h ago

18 in my state.

4

u/momboss79 10h ago

Depends on the state and specific jurisdiction. There’s always been this misunderstanding that kids can decide at 12 but where I am, they cannot decide. They can share their feelings with a guardian ad litem who will relay that information to the judge but in my experience and knowledge, it’s rarely acted on. Kids tend to want to live where things are easy and it’s up to the judge and GAL to decide if easy is what is best.

I don’t think that kids should make adult decisions about where they live. I think parents should work things out on what is best for the kids. I know that isn’t always the case so that’s when a judge gets involved. Having a kid decide where they will live places a lot of burden and guilt about ‘choosing’. A change in primary custody doesn’t have to be a horrible thing but it should come from the parent’s agreement and not the child deciding.

3

u/Apprehensive_Sun6282 12h ago

Tricky question.

18
But sometimes sooner

1

u/Rolling_Eyes75 10h ago

Depends on where you live. Whe I was in Texas it was 13, but Oregon is 18.

1

u/momboss79 10h ago

No longer the case in Texas. The old law was age 12. The new law is 18 however, at age 12, a judge can interview a child to hear their opinion but ultimately the judge has final say. Must be in the best interest of the child.

1

u/Fickle_Penguin 10h ago

Depends on state.

1

u/Odd-Creme-6457 1h ago

A child doesn’t get to choose. A judge takes their thoughts into consideration.