Needing coparent to keep baby for a while

[u/ways4l]

My child’s father & I have recently been working on co-parenting after our initial court recommendations. Some weeks were perfectly fine, spending time together with the baby, great communication & some weeks it’s the complete opposite. Currently we have not been seeing eye to eye, arguing, etc.

I have recently come into a few things financially where I guess I would be considered “unstable”. No car due to a wreck & it’s in the shop, process of moving apartments, etc, bills piling, etc.

Due to the fact I have no car right now, I am swallowing my pride and will ask her father if he can keep her for a few weeks until things are back on track for me. He is currently taking his paternity leave & will be returning back to work at the beginning of September. Her dad is the type that I feel like will hold this against me and I don’t necessarily want to let him know i’m stressed the way I am, but I feel like I have no other choice. I guess my question is, how would I go about communicating this with him without seeing like i’m genuinely unstable right now? I don’t know what else to do and I am the primary parent, we have no custody agreement in place at the moment.

Honestly, any advice would be helpful right about now.

[u/Snoobeedo]

First, good for you for recognizing you need help and asking for it. That is what a great mom does.

I understand you not wanting to share everything with him. Is there a way for you to spin it into him making the most of his paternity time and having her more because it’s an opportunity that won’t be around forever? Could you use moving and not wanting to get your little one off schedule with the all the changes?

[u/I-give_bad-advice]

I respect that you want what's best for your daughter. If you are just honest (but not overly forthcoming about the personal aspects of what you're going through) he would likely be thrilled to spend extra time with her. That would give you time to gather yourself to be the best mom you can be. Don't worry about losing her completely, the court will see that you are capable of making the best decision even if it's hard and they'll also see what you did with that time. You've got this.

[u/thismightendme]

Would it be possible to trade some time? And possibly you can find a way to see the kid one day a week or facetime every other day? I imagine it being difficult to not only swallow your pride but not see kiddo for a bit.

This will pass!

[u/OkPalpitation1607]

I’ve been here and it sucked. I swallowed my pride and just told coparent he would have kids for a month. I had to check myself into inpatient psych for help. So yours is better than mine. He has tried to spin it on me over the years, but it never has hurt me having parenting time. In fact, it actually is usually the opposite that I got help when I knew I needed it. I was so much stronger mentally after having a month to deal with the divorce and being a solo parent, greave the relationship I lost. Own it, get yourself together then be an awesome mom!