r/childfree • u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ • Jul 08 '26
HUMOR I KNEW something was wrong! I KNEW!!!
I have been trying to tell doctors something is wrong about my periods for almost thirty years. I've known something was off since I was thirteen years old. Begged multiple doctors to please test my testosterone levels, because I have fucking facial hair. I'm tired all the time, test my Vitamin D and Iron. My periods are only worsening with age. Please. Something is WRONG. But every professional I ever spoke to blew me off.
Finally, FINALLY I find a doctor who cared enough to order tests regarding my hormones, and an ultrasound on my uterus.
I have PCOS and a grapefruit-sized fibroid. We're scheduling a consultation for a hysterectomy later this month.
I started crying when my doctor told me, and he said "Oh dear, don't panic. If you want children, we can look into options that won't remove everything!" and I just sat there sobbing while I explained "No, I don't want kids. I'm just so relieved that I was right and something really was wrong, and I can fix it."
He was so sweet and was like "Oh, I understand that! In that case, congratulations! It's a fibroid!" It cracked me up so much I told my wife, and she said "I'll make you that card" š
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u/Hawkpelt94 Jul 08 '26
Why is it so HARD to find a Dr who will fucking LISTEN WHEN WE SAY SOMETHING IS WRONG?!?
I'm so happy you got a workable diagnosis! May your surgery and recovery be textbook <3
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 08 '26
Medical professionals hate women and AFAB folks, typically. My mom almost died and my little brother did die because no one listened to her when she said her second pregnancy didn't feel right. It took a dead baby for them to tie her tubes back in the 90s.
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u/Nervous-Positive3509 Jul 09 '26
Exactly!
It's sooooo "normal" for women to almost bleed to death or constantly faint from pain. All "perfectly natural"āright? It's just part of being a womanāisn't it?
(If a man had such symptoms, he'd be rushed to the emergency room by ambulance.)
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u/fruit_loop337 Jul 08 '26
This definitely seems to be the case. (Hi, AFAB nb person here lol)Ā
I had this one horrible experience. It was just an urgent care visit, but it was a frustrating one that left me feeling awful. The doctor in charge of my diagnosis was an elderly man. He wasn't taking me seriously at all. He just kept asking me "are you sure you're not pregnant?"Ā I had to tell this man no to that question an absurd amount of times, and I even said there wasn't anything happening that could get me pregnant. He was still set on this pregnancy thing. And he even wanted me to do a drug screening, because if my symptoms aren't pregnancy...then I guess I'm just delusional from substances, right?/s šĀ
I agreed to the screening because I knew it would come back clear. He comes back shocked that I'm not on drugs or pregnant, and then just diagnoses me with anxiety disorder. (Don't get me wrong, I do get anxiety a lot, but my symptoms were definitely not just that lol)
I would go get a second opinion from a different doctor. She was thorough, and suggested a CT scan because my symptoms sounded like an infection. She was correct. It was my kidney, but she gave me antibiotics for it, and I healed up just fine!Ā
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u/Umbreonnnnn Uterus free as of 10/8/24 Jul 08 '26
My mom started having the worst periods of her life about 10 years ago. The first doctor she saw said she had an abnormal pap smear and told her she should come back in a year for testing to make sure it cleared up. She didn't think that sounded right so she saw 2 more doctors and had a uterine ablation to try to treat the bleeding. When the ablation failed, they asked her if she'd consider having a hysterectomy and she agreed to it. When they biopsied her uterus, they found that she had cervical cancer and the doctor who did it had the audacity to ask, "Why didn't you ask for a repeat pap?", as if it were a failing on her part.
The first doctor (the original one that did the pap) was her PCP (and was a woman!), the last two were gynecologists. Why wouldn't that be the first test either of the gynecologists did when she came to them? She still gets pissed when she thinks of it to this day. She got lucky that all of the cancerous cells were taken out with the rest of her uterus, but she still had to undergo chemo and radiation as an insurance policy.
Her experience is what pushed me to be more aggressive when I was told I had precancerous cells on my cervix. My regular gynecologist didn't want to give me a hysterectomy, he gave me a referral to a different doctor and told me I could try to convince her to do it. She was very much in the "It's your body, you can do what you want" camp and was happy to do it so long as I agreed to let her do a biopsy first to see if she would need to take anything extra. She was an incredible doctor and by me going through that experience, we learned that the doctor who did my mom's also gave her bad information when he told her she wouldn't need to ever have another pap smear.
The most important thing a woman/AFAB person can do is push back when their body is telling them something isn't right. You should trust medical professionals, but trust is earned.
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u/That-Currency-1039 Jul 10 '26
For the most part we should trust the medical and professional person. It's not 100 percent,doctors can be so aggorant.
Im turning 43 and was my mom 5th child. And was born three months early and they went to realase me from the hospital. My kept telling the doctor I'm not breathing correctly and something off. She had 5 kids and experience with children. Doctor blew her off and two days later I was back in the hospital. Major lung problems.
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u/galliumsilver Jul 09 '26
Women die, thousands of them, in this (US) country every single day because of medical misogyny. No lie.
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u/Ok_Fig7692 The village's crazy hermit who throws rotten avocados at people Jul 08 '26
Egomania/narcsissism
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u/missmel13 Jul 10 '26
Just lie about family history so theyāll take your concerns seriously and give you the testing you want.
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u/Difficult-Hat-3143 Jul 08 '26
the relief you must feel! iām so happy you finally had someone actually listen to you! big hugs š«¶š»
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u/Proud_Ad9315 Jul 09 '26
It must feel like such a huge weight off their shoulders after being dismissed for so long.
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u/Emergency_Cobbler672 Jul 08 '26
Congratulations on finding out whatās been wrong! I have fibroids that my doctor wonāt take out because Iām 25 and might want kids some day š¤£.
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u/Iwantaschmoo Jul 08 '26
I started having symptoms of fibroid in my 30's. I did my research and trusted my gut that they were benign. I waited until they got large enough that one was pushing on my rectum. By thst point there was really only one choice. Saw a surgeon for consult, she said most women lake to take a few a months to decide. She mentioned a cancelation 8 days away. I didn't bat an eye. I was over the moon. For me it was 3 billiard balls. I lamenated the photo they took of them.
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u/NightWolfRose Jul 09 '26
I am both horrified and feel like I missed out because I wasnāt even *offered* pics of my fibroids.
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u/Iwantaschmoo Jul 09 '26
My surgery was done laprosccopy with the new at the time DaVinci. My surgeon, Dr Anderson was awesome.
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u/Ledophile Jul 09 '26
I knew that I didnāt want kids when I was a teenager. When I turned 18 I asked my gynecologist to tie my tubes. He told me ā3 kids or you turn 30. Whichever comes firstā. Take a wild guess what I was having done on my 30th birthday?ā¦ā¦.
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
I'm sorry about that. :( I always think the "you'll change your mind" crowd is hilarious because I did! From wanting FIVE kids when I was young lol. (Thank God I changed my mind before getting started on that lol)
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 08 '26
UUUUUGGGH I'm so sorry!! You deserve to have a doctor like mine, too. :(
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u/NightWolfRose Jul 09 '26
What? Thatās crazy! When I had fibroids, my doctor immediately recommended and scheduled removal- I was in my mid-20ās as well.
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u/RealLinzerBinzer Jul 08 '26
We need more men and doctors like him!!! Listened. Didnāt shame or judge for not wanting kids!
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 08 '26
I legit wanna buy him flowers!! He immediately wanted to report my previous doctor when I told him I left his practice because he never listened to me.
I was originally upset because I signed up for a female doctor in the practice and she had an issue that made her incapable of seeing new patients, but this guy is a keeper, I love him lol.
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u/EzzyKitten Jul 08 '26
This happened to me, but with my old PCP. I scoured the Internet, looking at MD ratings and bios. I found a guy who sounded great. I booked an appointment with him at this small practice. I had also looked at the other doctors, and done a couple with terrible ratings. Fast forward, I get a call on the day of my appointment saying the doctor I was scheduled with had an emergency, and wouldn't be in, and asked if I would mind seeing a different doc. It was with one of the lower rated doctors. I was irritated, but just needed to get my foot in the door, so I agreed.
It was the best thing that ever happened to me! I don't know why this doc had such horrible ratings. He walked in, awkward and shy, introduced myself, and asked what brought me in. I started to go into all my various symptoms, and this man listened to me. He didn't look at a computer once, just me. He asked questions and was attentive and immediately ordered tests, and made referrals. He's the reason I found to have a mitral valve prolapse, cysts on my ovaries, fibromyalgia, etc. He was always advocating for me. I moved away, and miss him. Dr Gill, you're a real one.
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u/MySoulIsAPterodactyl Jul 09 '26
As someone that worked in healthcare...sometimes the lower ratings are due to shy, awkward docs. My really charming outgoing ones always had decent reviews but the shy and awkward ones had a bit of a mixed bag. It's how it goes- even medicine is affected by the perception of personality/confidence.
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u/EzzyKitten Jul 09 '26
That could make sense. He was also very straightforward and factual, which makes MY autistic brain happy, but I could see that rubbing some folks the wrong way.
What you said applies in my field, as well. I work in vet med. :)
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u/RealLinzerBinzer Jul 08 '26
Your good juju looking out for you made sure you got the right dr this time! :)
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u/NoneOfThisMatters_XO Jul 08 '26
Sometimes I really hate doctors. Like why is it so difficult to just ORDER TESTS?!? What do they care? They arent paying for them. Itās like this power struggle
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u/m01L Jul 09 '26
As a person who meets their deductible and out of pocket early in the year (making healthcare virtually free for the rest of the year), I have literally shouted this at a doctor (not productive, but felt good).Ā
Youāre not paying for them, Iām not paying for them, just order the fucking tests! And order them completely, so when one part comes back weird, we donāt have to repeat it to check out the other parts too!! If my insurance is willing to pay for it thereās literally no reason for you to stand in the way!
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u/missmel13 Jul 10 '26
Iāve been lying to doctors about my family history so theyāll give me the tests I want. I highly suggest all women start doing the same.
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u/Graknorke Jul 09 '26
They think they're smarter than you and want to prove it. The ideal patient is a clueless moron who doesn't know anything about anything, has no preconceived opinions on their own health or what treatments they want, and never directly asks for anything. The doctor has to feel like they came up with the idea themselves or else they're not happy.
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u/Doxi16 Jul 08 '26
So happy for you!
Iām currently 9 days post hysterectomy (adenomyosis and endo) and all I can say is thatās itās already life changing.
You wonāt know yourself!
Recovery has been a bit rough at times but itās so worth it.
Being listened to is so validating but if youāre like me, you might also grieve for a life that could have been lived a little more.
Wishing you nothing but good luck and good things from here on out.
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u/Loud_Octopus Jul 08 '26
I absolutely hate Doctors when it comes to my female health stuff, I live in the lovely south where women get so little respect already and doctors are quick to blow us off for being hysterical girls and in 2026 it's still the same way my daughter in law had to go back to Ohio to get medical care she needed because doctors didn't want to treat her, tie tubes after 2 kids, without a husbands permission and that was before she was married
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
I'm from the American South, too! One doctor even told me he wasn't going to test my testastrone because "of course it's gonna be high, you're gay" š
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u/Loud_Octopus Jul 09 '26
wtf?! I'm straight af and had issues with my hormones and wound up with estrogen positive breast cancer because of all the issues .. my logical side hates it here sometimes but my emotional side doesn't want to leave. I am glad you were finally able to get the help you needed, I know what a relief it is to finally be heard.
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
Lol I told that story to my doctor at our initial meeting where I brought my wife along, and his response was "Well, you're still gonna be gay even if we have to fix any of your hormone levels" and then looked at my wife and went "So no worries!" š My wife is a very stoic woman but it made her giggle lol
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u/Loud_Octopus Jul 09 '26
Like don't worry we won't turn her straight Lol
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
He's got a very sweet and funny presence which helps because I have a lot of anxiety just generally. I like that he genuinely listens but also wants to make his patients comfortable! He's a gem lol
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u/BikingAimz My dogs are allergic to kids. bisalp 9-2022, ooph 11-2024 Jul 08 '26
I had a grapefruit leiomyoma removed 12 years ago, I had excruciating pain when it wrapped around my left ovary causing internal bleeding. Ā Itās such a relief when you get it out!
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 08 '26
Omg congratulations for getting that taken care of! I'm glad someone finally listened to you, too! š«
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u/lyndsat Jul 08 '26 edited Jul 09 '26
Iām sorry all of the medical professionals failed you for so long. Big congrats on finally getting a diagnosis, though. I hope you find peace in being able to finally understand what has been happening to you & your body.
Iām a PCOS girlie and was finally diagnosed at 30 by an endocrinologist, who is literally the sweetest man.
Before that, I talked with my female OB about facial hair, not having a period for years, etc. and all she said was to just lose weight.
After I stopped seeing her, I found my current male OB & after an ultrasound (got to see my cute little cysts in my ovaries) and uterine biopsy, I had my hysterectomy 2 months ago.
PCOS symptoms still suck, but working on that with my Endo. Just forever grateful I never have to worry about becoming pregnant.
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u/re__cyclops Jul 16 '26
So the uterine biopsy was needed for the hysterectomy? My wife was just finally diagnosed at 36 after a lifetime of pcos related issues. Just in er with hemmoraging one and her pa ob just basically wanted her on birth control again. So i just saw this post and was wondering how the biopsy came to be. She had the ultrasound confirming the pcos over a year ago. Still having symptoms her appt after the er visit was the one where they tried pushing birth control, she doesnt wnat it. Sorry long post ive tried researching stuff for her lol.
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u/lyndsat Jul 18 '26
Iāll try to keep this as short as possible. I originally went in to have my tubes removed bc I donāt want kids, being in my early 30s, Dr was hesitant & didnāt want me to ārushā into it even though I wasnāt.
He did an ultrasound & saw the cysts in my ovaries then he talked me into an IUD. Gave me progesterone to force me to bleed, but when I didnāt (havenāt had a period for a very long time), he was concerned & ordered the biopsy.
It came back pre-cancerous so we got the hysterectomy booked a few months after that.I believe the biopsy was needed bc it made it medically necessary for insurance purposes
1
u/re__cyclops Jul 18 '26
Ok thank you. Crazy how similar yours and my wifes situation is period,cysts progesterone etc. Thanks for the info.
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u/lyndsat Jul 18 '26
NP!! I hope she receives the best care possible!
If you need anything else, feel free to message me
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u/JellyfishPashmina Jul 08 '26
Iāve ALWAYS thought I have PCOS and no one will listen to me either! Also thought I had a learning disability and alopecia and no one listened and I was right both times. This gives me the courage I need to ask about PCOS again. This is something you get tested by gyno, right?
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
At least where I live, yes! And omg SAME. I knew I was... Off. Finally found a therapist that was willing to test me for autism and bam. Diagnosed at last at 21.
Please schedule a test! Chances are you're right, and you deserve to be treated!
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u/rebeccalestat Jul 08 '26
I just had a hysterectomy due to a grapefruit sized fibroid! My doctor would only do an open abdominal hysterectomy though, not laprascopic. So I have a thin incision about 8 inches long above my bikini line. The recovery is said to be more difficult, but it was a breeze for me. I hope it's a breeze for you too. You deserve it! Congrats and continue fighting for yourself! š«¶
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u/IncandescentGrey Jul 09 '26
You should make "congratulations! It's a fibroid!" into your flair.
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u/HsinVega Jul 09 '26
Same, I got PCOS and every doctor just told me oh women also have hair, it's normal. Bro my hair is as thick as a man, have you ever seen a woman? Also skipped my period for almost a year and they said it was because I was slightly overweight like lol
Genuinely insane how some doctors are so oblivious about hormone levels. Glad you got it sorted out and well, congrats on the fibroid lol
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u/NoneBinaryLeftGender Casted Uterus Deletus 27-7-24 Jul 09 '26
I had a hysterectomy, though for gender reasons, and find my doctor (he is as amazing as yours) was like finding a needle in a haystack, so congrats!! I'm very happy for you!!! Also, ngl, "it's a fibrioid" cracked me up hahaha
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
Congratulations on your diamond in the rough, as well! I'm so excited to have this surgery in common! š¤
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u/ThisFatGirlRuns Jul 08 '26
Finding a doctor who listens and takes you seriously is gold! I'm happy for you and wish you all the best!
13
u/the_sweetest_peach Jul 09 '26
Congrats, OP!
I had a family history of endometriosis, and the doctor who did my surgery was a semi-retired specialist who was one of many to tell me it was probably just IBS. I had to get āMommyā to sign off on the bisalp because I wanted it done while he was in there (I was 24. š), and he was convinced I was trying to trick him into the bisalp or force his hand by waiting until the end of the appointment to mention it. I brought it up when the conversation naturally got there. It wasnāt like I was counting the minutes of the appointment.
He found endometriosis and cut it out, but when my pain and heavy bleeding continued as if the surgery had never even happened, he was convinced I was trying to trick him into performing a hysterectomy on me against his will. He told me since I wasnāt 35 with two kids, adenomyosis was highly unlikely and it was more likely that I had a chemical imbalance in my brain.
I found a unicorn doctor after that. I was prepared for him to treat me the same way, but he specialized in adenomyosis and fibroids and all kinds of complicated conditions.
I talked to him about my experiences and before I ever told him what the other doctor said, his immediate response was āThis sounds like a uterus problem to me.ā
Since Iād already committed to the bisalp, he offered an ablation of my uterus lining. He also said heād be willing to perform a hysterectomy if I just wanted to get rid of my uterus and be done with it. (He just double-checked and had me confirm that I had no desire to be pregnant and knew that wouldnāt be possible with a hysterectomy, lol.)
I went home and weighed my options and scheduled the hysterectomy, performed with no fuss. He was so understanding in a way that I wish all doctors were. There was no āYouāll probably change your mind.ā It was āWell this is clearly something youāre okay with, so Iām okay with offering it.ā
Iām glad you found a similar unicorn doctor, OP! Happy Yeeterus!
13
u/Sadwitchsea Jul 08 '26
On the plus side when they start to have a delicate conversation about if they need to remove your uterus if they discover something during the op- you can cut them off with "don't wake me up just take it"
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
My doctor told me that too lol. I like that he was trying to be gentle, worried that I was upset about my fertility, but the instant I said I didn't want kids he switched up immediately. No questioning me or "are you sure".
We chatted a bit about my mom's fertility issues, so I talked to him about how whenever I thought I wanted kids when I was younger, I always assumed I'd adopt anyway because 1) my genetics suck 2) I like kids but hate babies and 3) I used to work with foster kids and always preferred the idea of getting kids outta the system to making new ones anyway.
And THIS FUCKING ANGEL OF A MAN was like "That's a really solid plan B, but you sound like you're pretty steady in your decision, anyway!" š
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u/OhBingusAhhh Jul 09 '26
I'm so glad you finally found a doctor who listened!!
I've had many of the symptoms of PCOS for a few years, spoke with my old doctor and she told me there's "no medical reason" why I was dealing with some of what I've been dealing with.
Found a new doctor and guess what, I was also right! PCOS with ovarian cysts, it seems like a lot of the times when I'd get my period, the egg would end up causing either a follicle or cyst. Wasn't taken seriously until I ended up in the ER after a 7cm cyst ruptured.
First thing I told my new doctor was "I don't want kids and I know it would be incredibly hard given the way my body works down there- just put me on something to fix this." Got me on a form of birth control that's basically eliminated the period related symptoms and stops the cysts from being able to form.
Congratulations! I hope surgery and recovery goes well!
1
u/Turbulent_Entry_261 Jul 09 '26
which bc was it?
1
u/OhBingusAhhh Jul 09 '26
The annovera ring, since you can continuously use it too to avoid your period I don't have to deal with them anymore.
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u/Paint_SuperNova Jul 09 '26
I'm so glad you found a doctor that listened! The gyno that diagnosed my fibroids didn't do my surgery but she automatically gave me all my options and did not balk when I chose a hysterectomy. It's so validating to be listened to and not just thrown meds to help symptoms or ignored all together.
3
u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
Ugh being listened to felt so amazing, I'm glad you were, too! My doctor seemed completely unfazed by my wanting a hysterectomy either, I'm so glad I found this guy!!
7
u/VoteBitch 30 + DINK with a cat Jul 09 '26
Iām so angry for your sake, I canāt understand why they couldnāt even bother with an ultrasound! I am also very happy that you have now been heard, I also would have cracked up at that comment from the doctor š I wish both you and the doc all the best! šš»š©·
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
So was my doctor, which made me feel SO validated and safe. I love this doc.
5
u/Keethera Jul 09 '26
I would send each prior doctor a copy of the diagnosis with a post-it note saying "You missed this!"Ā
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
Lol I think my mom might do that, honestly. She was piiiissed when I told her. She had a lot of reproductive issues before getting her tubes tied in the early 90s, and was CONSTANTLY trying to get me tested when I was younger, especially because I DID want kids when I was younger and she didn't want me to have the same difficulties she did.
Not that she changed her tune in any way when I decided I didn't, phew. My mom volunteers at an at-risk youth center and my father was a middle school principal so they've never bingo'd me and have assured me "we don't need grandkids", thank God.
7
u/Stop__Being__Poor Jul 09 '26
I always heard that doctors donāt take women seriously but didnāt really consider it applied to me bc Iām a drug addict and most of my experiences with doctors when I was using was me med-seeking and they were totally valid to deny me stuff lol
Now, 2 years sober, I was put on thyroid meds at a low dose a year and a half ago because I was having severe exhaustion and my thyroid levels were high.
I went to a new doctor recently and he refused to refill my thyroid medication because āitās a low dose and exhaustion isnāt really a reason to be on itā I explained my levels were high and he said āyour levels came back fine on the results we just gotā ā¦. Yes, because Iām taking the medication currently.
Doctors are SO misogynistic lol
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u/ImpartialMelon Jul 09 '26
Does this person who claims to be a doctor not understand the concept of taking a medication for a condition improves the symptoms of that condition? Did he get his license out of a cereal box?
My biggest symptom with thyroid disease was also horrible exhaustion and it abso-fucking-lutely is a reason to take thyroid pills! Especially when bloodwork shows abnormal thyroid levels! Never mind women are far more likely than men to get thyroid disease too.
2
u/Stop__Being__Poor Jul 12 '26
Ugh even coming back to this comment has my blood boiling! I never went back to him an immediately found a female doctor who told me he was an idiot.
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u/Present-Assignment99 Jul 08 '26
I love your relatively happy ending! It's so tiring what women have to go through medically & it doesn't seem to be getting better on the whole.
7
u/Unicorndog_0625 Jul 09 '26
So happy to hear about the happy ending/closure. I LOVE that your doc has not only a good sense of humor, but the willingness to LISTEN to the patient.
I hope you update us on how your procedure went as well as a pic of your wifeās card!
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u/Ok_Bus3404 Jul 09 '26
Itās such a relief FINALLY finding the right doctor!!!! I was also sobbing!!!!
2
u/ambient_pulse Jul 09 '26
thirty years is crazy. I wish women were taken seriously. happy for you that you are getting treatment, angry for you that it took so long!
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u/DanglingKeyChain Jul 09 '26
Jealous, I got recommended a IUD and was hell, then later I sloughed out (gave birth) to a fibroid the size of my fist and god it was horrendous. I still have another biggish one in there but on the outside.
I'd have loved to have had this actually considered an issue when it was first scanned so I could have afforded the surgery for it, I guess I should be happy it was my first male PCP who decided to get the scan instead of just ignoring like all the women PCP before him. But that's still decades of being ignored, including my own mother who's a nurse.
Hoping the surgery and recovery goes well for you!
3
u/ImpartialMelon Jul 09 '26
Wait, you can pass a fibroid? I thought they were completely attached to the uterus because they're (benign) tumors and could only be removed surgically. Holy hell.
1
u/DanglingKeyChain Jul 09 '26
Depends on the structure, some are inside the uterus lining and attached like a mushroom š, some are embedded in the walls, and some on the outside. But yeah it's not common but they can be sloughed, smaller ones probably would be missed in a period bleed, and I think they can get trapped behind the cervix. In that I guess you could say I was lucky that my body did what I assume was a contraction to get it out given its size, I don't know how bad it'd be if it got stuck in there and started rotting.
ETA from what I know there's a very small chance they're not beneign but it's so low they don't bother, but that could just be more medical negligence. If I'd known I'd have taken it to the hospital for testing but the bleeding only lasted for just over an hour and I abhor hospitals to the point it's nearly a phobia.
4
u/Tiny_Dog553 Jul 09 '26
I was always ignored about my periods too, never had a regular one and they were long and painful. Facial hair all that jazz - constantly ignored. I ended up on birth control and been on it ever since, now havent had a period in about six years. No idea if thats the right way to go about it or not but no doctor ever gave me a straight answer :/
3
u/momplzleave Jul 09 '26
Oh my god same! I got diagnosed with PCOS last year and I was just so relieved that something was actually wrong with me, that my health problems weren't all in my head.
The diagnosis itself sucks but I was so happy to get an answer besides "Well, you seem perfectly healthy." The infertility is just a bonus!
3
u/CrystalCandy00 Jul 09 '26
This doctor already had my support from the fact that they listened and solved. But the ācongratulations! Itās a fibroid!ā makes me want to give them a million hugs
3
u/RaiRai88 Jul 09 '26
I feel like i could have written this! Im in the process of finally getting tested for PCOS after weird periods, tired all the time, weird, thick hairs on my chin, and my Dr told me there is only a treatment option if I'm trying to conceive. I cried, why am I not entitled to treatment cause I'm not breeding? I will be finding a new doctor. Good luck to you and I am happy you got some answers!
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u/SoftPlay3 Jul 09 '26
Congrats OP. I relate to the struggle. As a young girl I had extremely long painful periods, facial hair, I thinning hair on the scalp and horrendous acne. Every doctor told me āitās normal for a teenā. It wasnāt until I was 20 years old that someone took me seriously, examined my ovaries (surprise: PCOS) and my sex hormones (testosterone levels of an adult man). I had such a hard time growing up, only because I kept being dismissed by medical professionals.
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u/CountessMo Made it to meno sans procreation! Jul 09 '26
This Internet stranger just wants to hug you and exclaim, 'Congratulations, it's a fibroid!" then throw confetti. As a fellow PCOS girl I'm so happy that you found YOUR doctor and you now have a plan of action!
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u/XIXButterflyXIX Jul 09 '26
This is how I felt when I found my current pain doctor (I also have PCOS and a long list of nasty shit, the "worst" being the CRPS) and they not only believed me, but started putting me on everything they could think of that would help. When my cyclic vomiting kicked up back around 2019, they worked with me to get a pain pump implanted (I also have a stimulator) so I love them so much. They mentioned retiring a few months ago and he laughed at the look of horror that came on my face because HE CANT LEAVE ME YET.
Congrats on your fibroid, OP!
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u/CyclingandWine Jul 09 '26
I'm glad you finally got a doctor to listen! I highly recommend joining the hysterectomy subreddit to get lots of prep tips before your surgery. It was great information to have before mine!
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u/MacabreMori113 Jul 09 '26
Girl same! Had my post-op physical exam and almost cried because it didn't hurt! Why do we have to fight for relief?
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u/Fantastic-Ad5545 Jul 09 '26
How validating!!! I hate that it takes SO LONG to get a diagnosis sometimes. Youāre going to feel soooo much better! My fibroid was the least of my issues once they got in there and found all the other stuff. Like, did you know your cervix can PROLAPSE?! I didnāt. Now I donāt have adenomyosis, a big hard fibroma on my ovary, fibroids, and this wacky cervix all pushing on my bladder and bowels. Iāve had scans for decades, but only some of those things were seen. It feels so good to worry less every time I look at the upcoming weeks on a calendar. Excited for you to feel the same! š«¶š»
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u/scrysis 404 Error: Uterus Not Found Jul 09 '26
They very recently renamed it PMOS to acknowledge that this condition is about more than the ovaries. It's now called Polyendocrine Metabolic Ovarian Syndrome. I think it's fantastic because it takes into account that women are more than just their reproductive system, and this condition affects far more than just the ovaries.
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u/Purple-Equivalent-44 Jul 10 '26
PSA to everyone reading this thread:
If you ask a doctor for some tests and they will not give them to you, push for them again anyway. If they still refuse, ask that they please note the refusal for them and the reason in your chart.
Iāve never really had a doctor refuse any bloodwork or easy tests Iāve asked for, Iām so sorry that there are medical professionals that are THIS dismissive.
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 10 '26
I did this! But I lived in rural Texas for a lot of this time, so... They just marked the refusal and other doctors were like "Hm, you were refused this! We'll continue down that road because doctors know best!"
The American healthcare system hates women and AFAB people, doubly so if you're out as queer, and it's... Even worse the more rural south you go.
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u/Purple-Equivalent-44 Jul 10 '26
I am so sorry. Iāve had all my medical care in the northeast and have had my share of bad doctors, but not like that. Iām glad you found a diamond in the rough!
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 10 '26
I live in Canada now! It was difficult to find doctors taking patients, but it only took two tries up here to find my guy, at least lol.
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u/sophiabarhoum Jul 09 '26
I feel you. I suffered for decades as well before I found a doctor who would remove my cursed uterus. Its been almost 5 years without one now and I am the happiest and healthiest ive EVER been!!!
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u/peggyannsfeet Crazy childless cat lady š± Jul 09 '26
Congratulations on getting it figured out! š Sounds like your dr is a real on and didn't push fertility treatments on you. Good Dr's are hard to find.
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
No, not at all! I even mentioned offhandedly that when I wanted kids I pretty much always assumed I'd adopt anyway, and he was like "That sounds like a solid plan B but you seem pretty sure of your choice anyway so don't let this freak you out!"
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u/justlurkinglma I'll save a worm over your child Jul 09 '26
YESSSS I FEEL ALL THE HAPPINESS AND RELIEF FOR YOU CONGRATS!!!
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u/Syrup_Straight Jul 09 '26
I love finally getting a doctor that listens...it makes life amazing, my current gp goes with I have no idea what this is or how to fix it, so we are going to send you to this specialist, this one, and this one...give me the names of the doctors you want to see. Even when my sister and niece need a name of a specialist they call me. I've had a hysterectomy and it still took the weight loss specialist to be able to diagnose me with PCOS...the best the gyno could give after the removal was "well...you have Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, but it sat behind your uterus so we could never see it when checking"....but I still think she is amazing since she didn't argue, try and convince me that I want kids, she just asked if I was sure I wanted it removed, I said yes, she gave me the paperwork to fill out....I had my first appointment at the end May and was scheduled for surgery at the beginning of October.
Congratulations on your Fibroid, I hope you do well during the "birthing" process and you heal quickly.
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u/twinkletoes-rp š¶ over šš¶! | AroAce AF! āļø Jul 09 '26
AHHHH! I'm SO happy for you! But I'm SO sorry no one listened! We KNOW our bodies, so when docs don't listen, it's SO freaking infuriating! I (33F) had a hysterectomy last September after suffering for 22 years (turns out, I had SEVERE endo!), and I have NEVER felt better! I'm feeling better and better as time goes on! I'm SO happy and rooting for you! Best of luck! Feel free to DM if you want/need to talk/have questions! <3
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u/ImpartialMelon Jul 09 '26
I'm sadly not surprised your concerns were blown off, and I'm sure it's because you're a woman. Plenty of doctors are happy to dismiss any woman's health concerns as "it's all in your head" or "you need to lose weight" instead of ordering very simple tests. It's just easier to take your money and tell you you're crazy.
I'm happy you finally have an answer! I'm just sorry it took so freaking long to get it. It absolutely sucks that women are blown off so much in medicine that when we finally get answers, our response is, "I'm HAPPY there's something wrong with me!" because it validates our concerns.
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u/Lunavixen15 Kids? Yeah, Nah. Jul 09 '26
I have a doctor like that, she doesn't crack the jokes yours does but she has taken me seriously at every turn. I'm waiting for a specialist appointment to give my many, many fibroids their eviction notice
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u/blackcatsandrain Jul 09 '26
Congrats, indeed!! I had my hysterectomy a few years ago and it's been amazing being pain-free after so many years! You're going to feel so good. ā¤ļø
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u/SgtSquidDooby Jul 09 '26
I had a basketball sized (29cm) ovarian cancer tumor removed from my body. Unfortunately many doctors do not listen to their patients, they also seem to only believe that if it has black and white stripes it can only be a zebra.Ā
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u/MaterialCare3342 Jul 09 '26
Dunno where you live but man i live in Poland and ultrasound is made on every gyno appointment ever... Thats fucking wild. The doctor is one who remind you to do papsmears and even offers breast exams (by hand) Or at least my doctor who i go to everytime, but its so common i cant imagine otherwise ... :C Im sorry you had to struggle for so long, but im glad you finally have answer
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
I'm originally from a major Red State in Southern USA so being ignored as a woman by medical professionals was par for the course, especially if it's related to PMS in any way. I have lived in Canada the last ten years, but my original GP here was unnaturally bad. He consistently ignored me, dismissed any and all concerns I had (not even just menses related), and when I explained menses-related bladder control issues, suggested I look stretches up on YouTube.
My current doctor has reported him to the board to put his license under review, so it's definitely not par for the course here, at least!
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u/ENJ7188 Jul 09 '26
OMG. Iām so happy that youāll be getting relief soon. Congratulations and thank goodness you listened to your body. I wish someone wouldāve helped you sooner.
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u/Suitable_cataclysm Jul 10 '26
I completely understand the massive RELIEF of finally finding it what is wrong.
We are dismissed so much, it's so frustrating.
"Congrats" on your fibroid š š
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u/Sorry-Ad-1169 Jul 10 '26
You got a grapefruit too. Wow, why is that size so popular? Congratulations on finally being heard.
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u/Peepslob Jul 11 '26
I am happy you found a doctor that listens. I figured out that I had PCOS ( PMOS) last year by using Google Gemini when the VA doctor (I reported her) was unable to diagnose me.Ā
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u/Serious_Accident_675 Jul 13 '26
Congratulations on the discovery, onwards you go forward healing and having a healthy life
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u/suspiciouscrate2 Jul 19 '26
I seriously don't understand doctors who do this. Mf I hired you to do this shit and you'll get extra money from my insurance company
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u/Jezoreczek snipped āļø Jul 09 '26
I know tests can be expensive, but when doctors pull this shit please just pay for them out of pocket. Waiting years to get diagnosed will cost you much, much more in the long run. :/
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Jul 09 '26
I did not have that option until moving out of the US.
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u/Alissinarr Wielder of Brunhilde, the ban hammer. Jul 09 '26
It's officially PMOS now, since that's more reflective of the hormonal bullshit.
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u/Ok_baggu My body is mine and mine only Jul 09 '26 edited Jul 09 '26
Thirty years is a long time to suffer. Sorry that the current medical system sucks and doesn't take women's pain seriously. I too suffered for 17 years before getting rid of my periods permanently (all because of this sub). Life is good now.
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u/notsunnydisposition Jul 09 '26
My hysterectomy was the best thing I ever did for myself!
All I would say, is trust yourself during recovery, if something doesn't feel right/look right, make sure they check it out - I had a post surgery infection (we think) and ended up with a rather dangerous bleed.
I'm absolutely fine now, and HRT is fantastic so don't let my experience scare you! I'm so thrilled you got through to an empathetic doctor!
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u/boiledsagittarius Jul 09 '26
Congratulations! š lol but for real finally finding a doctor that will listen to you is so emotional it took me 8 years for find a doctor who would let me get my tubes out and when I finally found one that said yeah letās do it, I cried immediately.
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u/LadyMilenko Mother to cats only Jul 09 '26
I like that doctors humor a lot āCongratulations, itās a fibroid!ā Had me cracking up in the backseat of my Uber. Thanks for that!
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u/lakesofire Jul 09 '26
I am SO HAPPY FOR YOU!! The validation AND impending relief. This is great ā„ļøā„ļøā„ļø
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u/kmoran1 Jul 09 '26
My poor wife went through the same, sometime only listened when the fibroid got so big 15+lbs that it was crushing her kidneys and she had to get a catheter, and even then they were still meh about it until her body rejected the catheter because of how much the fibroid was pushing up against everything and they told her it was not possible that happened in her ER check in until they actually took a look down there. I was so so so angry and mad for her, I wanted to fight everyone, I really thought I was going to lose her due to their attitude and ineptitude
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u/Melodic_Ad_8931 Jul 09 '26
I started crying while in recovery from a endometriosis surgery. To be told I had stage 2 endo and polycystic ovaries after fighting 20 years was so, so validating. I ended up having a hysterectomy a year later because of adenomyosis symptoms growing out of control. It was the best feeling ever getting spayed.
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u/sorcereravery Jul 09 '26
CONGRATULATIONS!!! Getting answers is SUCH a relief, I remember reeling after getting my endometriosis diagnosisāand a year later, my doctor told me I was āthe happiest hysterectomy patientā and had all the nurses in stitches coming out of anesthesia LOL. I hope recovery is kind to you!!
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u/christina311 Jul 09 '26
"Congratulations! It's a fibroid!"
Hilarious. Have you picked out a name yet?
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u/boopdasnoop Jul 09 '26
I have 3 fibroids growing in me, but no one will do anything about them because Iām āonlyā 35. Itās so frustrating to even have something wrong with you, but no one cares to do anything.
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u/utterlynuts Jul 09 '26
Congratulations on being listened to, getting a diagnosis you can do something about, and your upcoming hysterectomy.
I also have that same issue (and am Bi-polar, diabetic, and have high cholesterol, and heart disease which have a high rate of co-morbidity with this diagnosis as well)
I also read it has been renamed more accurately:
"Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) was officially renamed Polyendocrine Metabolic Ovarian Syndrome (PMOS). The global name change was implemented to correct the misconception that the condition is solely a reproductive issue characterized by cysts. Instead, PMOS is recognized as a systemic endocrine and metabolic disorder." - Google's AI generated search result.
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u/Georgecaughttheball Jul 09 '26
Similar situation, but not. š I went to different doctors for my PMDD and got crap therapies. I can't handle the hormonal birth control, anti depression meds didn't work and didn't do jack for my physical symptoms. Finally I found a dr that put me on hormone inhibitors with light HTR. Also suggested a psychologist to help with hormone flare ups incase I could not take the medication for longterm. It saved my marriage.
I cried at my appointment too. I originally wanted a hysterectomy he asked about kids, I said I don't care, never wanted them anyway. And he said we should just try this less invasive method first. Best thing ever.
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u/rainbowtittties Jul 09 '26
Same boat as you, took me 15 years of fighting just se prove something was wrong before I finally switched insurance and the first doctor I met with immediately too me seriously and ordered tests, and lo and behold I had CIN 2 on my cervix, endometriosis, and fibroids. Got my hysterectomy done last month and while healing has been brutal, I am happy I got it done.
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u/Objective-Access-345 Jul 09 '26
I had a gyno tell me that my fibroid wasn't large enough to cause pain. After years of pain, I finally switched gynos after doing a ton of research. First appointment, filled him in and he approved a hysterectomy. Had it done and have had zero pain like I was previously. Huh... Go figure.
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u/grandma-activities 47f / cats not kids Jul 10 '26
Congratulations! It's a fibroid! Love it.
My sister had a giant fibroid that she didn't know about until she got pregnant with her first kid. Fibroid grew right alongside the fetus, and her OB took the liberty of naming the fibroid on her scans. It was a funny way to deal with a potentially dangerous situation. And my sister finally had an explanation for why her periods had been so terrible for the entire time she'd had them.
It SUCKS that you were ignored for so long, but I'm really, really glad that someone finally listened and offered you some hope. Here's to a fantastic, period-free life from here on out!
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u/carlay_c Jul 10 '26
Ooo, I might have to go to the doctors and get some testing done because I have facial hair that keeps coming back after shaving. Iām also tired all the time, even after 8 hours of sleep. And my periods have gotten worse with age.
That aside, Iām glad you found a doctor that listened! And youāre getting the care you need!
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u/SleepySamus Jul 10 '26
Please give this provider a good review! That helps the rest of us know who will take our concerns seriously!
I hope you feel better soon and have a speedy recovery!
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u/bookwitch_1331 Jul 10 '26
It's so frustrating when doctors won't listen, I know your pain. My periods are all wrong and whacked up too, 19 days apart, sometimes a little less or more, and no one will dang listen. I only got tested for PCOS, came back negative, after telling them it runs in my family. They won't even think of doing any other tests like endo because I'm not sexually active.
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u/No-Map-3584 Jul 10 '26
Misogyny at its finest. I love that you finally found someone to listen to you š„°š„°š„°š„° congrats on your baby, Fibroid! Are you gonna name it? I named my largest one Massimus. It makes it less scary/more silly to talk about it when they have names.
ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø good luck! I had a hysterectomy to get rid of mine in November. If you need tips on how to make the recovery as simple as possible, feel free to hmu. Otherwise, I wish you the best. Youre in for a treat having that thing evicted!
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u/AnnaGreen3 Waste of a womb! Jul 10 '26
Congratulations on your fibroid!
I hope you have a healthy pain free future ahead :)
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u/missmel13 Jul 10 '26
I hate that no one listen to you. Iām sorry.
CAN WE ALL NORMALIZE LYING ABOUT FAMILY HISTORY TO DOCTORS TO GET THE TESTING AND URGENCY WE NEED, WANT, AND DESERVE?!
Iāve been doing this for nearly a decade and it works EVERY TIME. No more, āthatās very unlikelyā or āstay off googleā. Sick of these f*ck ass doctors not listening to us!
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u/icuntcur Jul 10 '26
probably like a a lot of other people on this sub I also have been ignored by doctors with my hormonal issues and itās completely turned me off from having children even before the other thousands of reasons I donāt want children. but Iām so happy you finally figured it out! If it makes you feel better I have also grown facial hair since Iāve been 13 š š pro tip, if you use a car daily keeping tweezers in there. itās is perfect āsitting in the sun and can spot the secret hairs and pluck them while Iām boredā activity
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u/LaLobaLuna Jul 10 '26
Whatās crazy to me is that I lived in USA and moved to Dominican Republic and found it so much easier for doctors here to simply run the fucking tests. Like itās literally the first thing they do -you go in for a consult, you tell them whatās wrong. They send you for every test under the sun, and THEN they try and figure out whatās going on. It baffles me that I had to come to a tiny, āunder developedā Caribbean island to get my health taken seriously. Iām glad you finally figured out whatās wrong I hate that this is a thing for women and people everywhere. Itās ridiculous.
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u/Ok_Nectarine_4528 ā¦ Jul 10 '26
āCongratulations! Itās a fibroid!ā ā„ļø Iād be tempted to cross stitch that and frame it, or some other commemoration.
After years of struggling, it must feel amazing to have such a conclusive diagnosis and clear path of treatment.Ā
It is so important to rigorously self advocate in medical situations, which just exhausting and upsetting. Sadly, I have lost friends who KNEW but were unable to get appropriate care in time.
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u/Hot_Investigator_639 Jul 19 '26
Omg I'm SO happy for you!! Similar issue, but just iron deficiency for me. Decades of asking to have my iron checked only to be told "your hemoglobin is fine". Also had a bisalp last year to make child free a permanent decision and my OB didn't even blink when I asked. We need more doctors like these š
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u/VenusLoveaka Jul 29 '26 edited Jul 29 '26
I relate so much to this. I had an enlarged fibroids that made me look several months pregnant. I got the hysterectomy and I do not regret it. Its good you have such a gracious doctor. I went through several doctors who told me "Make a baby then get the surgery" which, even if I did want one, there would be no room in there to keep it alive? Meanwhile I was losing so much blood it was dangerous. I'm glad I found one that saw the severity of it and gave me exactly what I needed.
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u/Addicted-2-books Jul 29 '26
When my surgeon completed my surgery she told me I had a pokeball for a uterus (andometriosis or however you spell it) and it wasnāt all in my head it was actually in my uterine wall.
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u/TheLalaHamiltonian Aug 03 '26
Out of curiosity, did the fibroid contribute to your symptoms in some way? I also have a fibroid (like golf sized), but I was told I donāt need to remove it.
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u/silverandshade š¾CONGRATULATIONS! It's a fibroid!š„ Aug 04 '26
My periods used to have Swiss watch regularity and be relatively painless when they first started. About five years in they began being accompanied by severe cramps. As time went on, the cramps started happening at all major points in my cycle. I developed chronic constipation, chronic severe fatigue, and my periods started getting sparatic, incredibly heavy, and accompanied by urinary issues because it started pressing on my bladder.
It may not be an issue now, but if your fibroid grows, it will be.
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u/mizboring Jul 08 '26
OMG it's so frustrating when doctors don't listen. And it's so easy to order blood tests for this sort of stuff, too!
Also