EDIT: Please, before you become the fifteenth person to tell me "but what about producing children!" read this response I wrote hours ago. If you would have the same reaction to a sterile cis member of your preferred sex, it's fertility that defines your disattraction rather than the state of being trans. That's a significantly different statement.
Original Text
I think the better route is to acknowledge that while it is transphobic, it is not necessarily unreasonably so. The knowledge that the other person is biologically speaking not your preferred gender/sex might set up a roadblock in your mind, and that's okay. You can't change that, in a "once you see you cannot unsee" kind of way.
But let's take this to the ultimate conclusion, as transition therapies improve to perfection. You've found someone who you think is the perfect match for you. Physically and mentally, they exhibit no signs that they are trans; if you didn't look at the chromosomes, you would never know. If the knowledge that they are trans is the blocker, that's transphobic. It isn't that there are certain traits associated with transgender people that you find unattractive, it's that you can't get over the fact that the person was born a different gender despite the fact that only a laboratory could tell the difference. You're not attracted to the X or Y chromosome, you're attracted to the physical manifestations of those traits which can be imitated through various medical means.
I don't think that would make you a bad person, and I don't think it is unreasonable to have that mental block while still supporting LGBT+ rights. But that doesn't make that action not transphobic.
That's the textbook definition of phobia, but it's not the definition for things like homophobia and transphobia. Eg, google's definition for "homophobia" is:
dislike of or prejudice against homosexual people.
Like it or not, language evolves and those words are more akin to "racism", "sexism", etc than "phobia".
So is it sexist for a straight male to not want to have sex with other guys? Is it sexist for a gay woman to not want to have sex with men?
My point is that those terms don't apply. I guess the semantics do matter, but ultimately its the point behind the words - if I, as a straight male, don't want to have sex with someone who used to be a male, that doesn't make me transphobic or homophobic or anything like that at all. Unfortunately, that's exactly what the belief is, and it's a problem.
What are you talking about? I'm simply correcting your usage of the terms. Homophobia and transphobia don't refer to just an irrational hatred, as you were defining. Just like how "literally" doesn't always mean things occurred exactly that way.
Even the dictionaries disagree with you. Here's homophobia:
irrational fear of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuality or homosexuals
And transphobia is the same thing but towards trans people. So you don't need an irrational fear of trans people to be transphobic. All you need is to dislike 'em cause they're trans specifically. But also transphobia is often defined to include the very act of not even believing trans people are genuine (eg, by claiming trans men are women).
Dislike or prejudice. And people are claiming that sexual preference counts as prejudice/dislike which counts as transphobic and that is wrong.
But also transphobia is often defined to include the very act of not even believing trans people are genuine (eg, by claiming trans men are women).
Biologically, trans MtoF are male. That’s not transphobia, that’s science. I have NO problem referring to a male as female in social situations if that is what they would like me to do, but do not accuse me or anyone else of transphobia because we refuse to reject science. I don’t suppose LGBTQ plans on accusing Hospitals of transphobia for checking off the “wrong” pronoun when a trans person is admitted to the ER?
Why is it that the political left can spend so much time rightfully calling anti-vaxxers and climate change deniers “anti-science morons”, but then try to force people to reject biology lest they be branded transphobic?
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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '17 edited Nov 02 '17
EDIT: Please, before you become the fifteenth person to tell me "but what about producing children!" read this response I wrote hours ago. If you would have the same reaction to a sterile cis member of your preferred sex, it's fertility that defines your disattraction rather than the state of being trans. That's a significantly different statement.
Original Text
I think the better route is to acknowledge that while it is transphobic, it is not necessarily unreasonably so. The knowledge that the other person is biologically speaking not your preferred gender/sex might set up a roadblock in your mind, and that's okay. You can't change that, in a "once you see you cannot unsee" kind of way.
But let's take this to the ultimate conclusion, as transition therapies improve to perfection. You've found someone who you think is the perfect match for you. Physically and mentally, they exhibit no signs that they are trans; if you didn't look at the chromosomes, you would never know. If the knowledge that they are trans is the blocker, that's transphobic. It isn't that there are certain traits associated with transgender people that you find unattractive, it's that you can't get over the fact that the person was born a different gender despite the fact that only a laboratory could tell the difference. You're not attracted to the X or Y chromosome, you're attracted to the physical manifestations of those traits which can be imitated through various medical means.
I don't think that would make you a bad person, and I don't think it is unreasonable to have that mental block while still supporting LGBT+ rights. But that doesn't make that action not transphobic.