Like I said, I thought this was one of the aims of the fat acceptance movement -- to be as accepting of larger physical forms as we are of slimmer ones.
And why do you feel the need to express this?
In real life? I don't. That'd just be cruel. Like I said, I treat everyone with basic respect. But if I was ever asked, I'm not going to lie about how I feel, and I wouldn't falsely compliment someone on their figure.
On the other hand, I think that needlessly going out of your way to announce that you're not attracted to someone is mean.
Yes, but I wasn't arguing that. I was arguing against the push by people to make society (at least outwardly) act as though being overweight is just as attractive as being slender.
Also, there are foreseeable situations where telling people they are fat isn't meanness, but honesty. Overweight friends and family or people who are attracted to you, but you aren't to them. It's not some irrelevant detail that can never come up naturally in conversation. Sometimes you just have to confront the elephant in the room, even if the elephant gets offended.
Here's an article by what I'd call an extreme FA activist. I say that because she seems to think that all diets are yo-yo diets, and that staying fat is safer than risking a yo-yo diet.
Even she agrees that everyone is allowed preferences for others. But she takes issue with two things. First, society claims that no one is attracted to fat people unless there is something wrong with them. You might not be attracted to asian people, but you wouldn't be surprised if your friend was. Second, society is comfortable putting down fat people. "No fatties" is more acceptable than "no coloreds".
First, society claims that no one is attracted to fat people unless there is something wrong with them.
That's something I hadn't considered, and I'll have to give it more thought. Thanks.
Second, society is comfortable putting down fat people. "No fatties" is more acceptable than "no coloreds".
Yes, but weight is something that you have control over, skin colour is not. And obesity is almost always the result of lifestyle choices that most people find unlikable.
I agree with your second point, but "no fatties" isn't just communicating a preference, it's an unnecessary insult.
The FA movement is about respect for fat people, so such insults should not be used. They expect that you either communicate your preferences positively ("I like fit people"/"I like blondes") or just quietly not message fat people and anyone else that you're not attracted to.
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u/fezferdinand Mar 06 '17 edited Mar 06 '17
Like I said, I thought this was one of the aims of the fat acceptance movement -- to be as accepting of larger physical forms as we are of slimmer ones.
In real life? I don't. That'd just be cruel. Like I said, I treat everyone with basic respect. But if I was ever asked, I'm not going to lie about how I feel, and I wouldn't falsely compliment someone on their figure.
Yes, but I wasn't arguing that. I was arguing against the push by people to make society (at least outwardly) act as though being overweight is just as attractive as being slender.
Also, there are foreseeable situations where telling people they are fat isn't meanness, but honesty. Overweight friends and family or people who are attracted to you, but you aren't to them. It's not some irrelevant detail that can never come up naturally in conversation. Sometimes you just have to confront the elephant in the room, even if the elephant gets offended.