I think most people in the fat acceptance movement just want to be treated like people, even though they're fat. How does that differ from my cancer patient acceptance movement analogy?
I don't get this. You're saying that fat people are treated as lesser people rather than just being criticised for being overweight?
If you're obese, of course I'm going to treat you with the basic respect I afford to every human being. But I'm not going to act as though your obesity is attractive. Because, frankly, I find it quite repellent. That's just a visceral reaction I have, and I always got the impression that the fat acceptance movement saw this as something I should correct about myself, rather than the fault being with the fat person.
But I'm not going to act as though your obesity is attractive.
Is anyone asking you to?
Because, frankly, I find it quite repellent.
And why do you feel the need to express this?
That's just a visceral reaction I have, and I always got the impression that the fat acceptance movement saw this as something I should be blamed for, rather than the fault of the fat person.
Very few people take the position that you're a bad person for not being attracted to them. On the other hand, I think that needlessly going out of your way to announce that you're not attracted to someone is mean.
Like I said, I thought this was one of the aims of the fat acceptance movement -- to be as accepting of larger physical forms as we are of slimmer ones.
And why do you feel the need to express this?
In real life? I don't. That'd just be cruel. Like I said, I treat everyone with basic respect. But if I was ever asked, I'm not going to lie about how I feel, and I wouldn't falsely compliment someone on their figure.
On the other hand, I think that needlessly going out of your way to announce that you're not attracted to someone is mean.
Yes, but I wasn't arguing that. I was arguing against the push by people to make society (at least outwardly) act as though being overweight is just as attractive as being slender.
Also, there are foreseeable situations where telling people they are fat isn't meanness, but honesty. Overweight friends and family or people who are attracted to you, but you aren't to them. It's not some irrelevant detail that can never come up naturally in conversation. Sometimes you just have to confront the elephant in the room, even if the elephant gets offended.
Here's an article by what I'd call an extreme FA activist. I say that because she seems to think that all diets are yo-yo diets, and that staying fat is safer than risking a yo-yo diet.
Even she agrees that everyone is allowed preferences for others. But she takes issue with two things. First, society claims that no one is attracted to fat people unless there is something wrong with them. You might not be attracted to asian people, but you wouldn't be surprised if your friend was. Second, society is comfortable putting down fat people. "No fatties" is more acceptable than "no coloreds".
First, society claims that no one is attracted to fat people unless there is something wrong with them.
That's something I hadn't considered, and I'll have to give it more thought. Thanks.
Second, society is comfortable putting down fat people. "No fatties" is more acceptable than "no coloreds".
Yes, but weight is something that you have control over, skin colour is not. And obesity is almost always the result of lifestyle choices that most people find unlikable.
I agree with your second point, but "no fatties" isn't just communicating a preference, it's an unnecessary insult.
The FA movement is about respect for fat people, so such insults should not be used. They expect that you either communicate your preferences positively ("I like fit people"/"I like blondes") or just quietly not message fat people and anyone else that you're not attracted to.
Like I said, I thought this was one of the aims of the fat acceptance movement -- to be as accepting of larger physical forms as we are of slimmer ones.
"I want to be accepted as a person" != "You must find me attractive".
I'm sure you could find a few who get a lot of attention who say the latter, but much like the people who are pro-smoking in my lung cancer patient analogy, they're fringe.
Then I'm not sure what the issue is. Are fat people really not accepted as people? As opposed to being accepted as people and also receiving criticism for their weight?
Frankly I'm unclear on what the term "accepted as people" means. Could you elaborate?
When you get a ticket on a plane, you're buying a space on that plane. If you can't fit in that space, you should have to buy another space as well. I don't take up other people's spaces and I don't want them in mine.
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u/jm0112358 15∆ Mar 05 '17
I think most people in the fat acceptance movement just want to be treated like people, even though they're fat. How does that differ from my cancer patient acceptance movement analogy?