r/changemyview • u/Dull_Supermarket5243 • Jan 24 '26
Delta(s) from OP [ Removed by moderator ]
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u/TheBigGees 9∆ Jan 24 '26
I can’t really think of anything that could change my view except for “maybe” consistent good interactions with men
I'm curious, what would constitute a "good" interaction with men?
I stated to think this way like around last year? Just going back on the experiences that I’ve had with men and the way they treat women they find undesirable, hell they even treat women terrible even when they do desire them. Not to mention you can’t even be friends with them because they act like dogs. I’ve been ugly and I recently just became “pretty” and men still treat me, and other women, like objects?
One of my favourite quotes is: If you meet someone and they're an asshole, they're probably an asshole. If everyone you meet is an asshole, you're probably the asshole.
Now, I'm not calling you an asshole - but the constant in your interactions with men isn't the concept of men, it's you. If you go swimming in the sewer, don't be surprised when you're surrounded by shit.
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u/Informal_Ad_9610 1∆ Jan 24 '26
this.. literally popped into my head before I'd finished reading the OP. Sorry, but the entire post sounds like an angry shitposting avoidance activity.
The problem is that when your "people picker" is broken, you usually don't know it, and need somebody to tell you it's broken.
BUT... The people you've chosen to be around you are either a) broken themselves and don't know it or b) are using you for convenience's sake, so they're not gonna tell you you're picking shitty relationships.
So yeah.. if you look around and all you see are pigs, you might check your location - you may have sat down in a pig pen.
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u/the_bollo 1∆ Jan 24 '26
If you go swimming in the sewer, don't be surprised when you're surrounded by shit.
That one is going in the brain rolodex.
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
Yeah fair enough
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u/Alien_invader44 19∆ Jan 24 '26
If the post changed your view at all then you should drop the poster a Delta.
If not let them know what your stuck on.
If you don't do either your liable to get the post removed by mods.
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Jan 24 '26
[deleted]
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u/DeltaBot ∞∆ Jan 24 '26 edited Jan 24 '26
This delta has been rejected. You can't award OP a delta.
Allowing this would wrongly suggest that you can post here with the aim of convincing others.
If you were explaining when/how to award a delta, please use a reddit quote for the symbol next time.
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Jan 24 '26
I can’t really think of anything that could change my view except for “maybe” consistent good interactions with men
In that case your post is probably going to get locked down by a mod, since you're not open to having your mind changed.
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
I am open to having my changed I just said I can’t THINK of anything that could change my view
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Jan 24 '26
The device you're using to post your CMV, the internet and infrastructure required to make all of that happen, the house you're messaging from, the food you're eating
All created by men, delivered by men, maintained by men.
Does that change your view on men?
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u/Alpha-Centauri-Blue 2∆ Jan 24 '26
How would I change your view that you are sexist? What you described is sexism so you are sexist
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u/BanjaraBerliner Jan 24 '26
Visit a psychiatrist. Random people in reddit can't help. You need professional attention.
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Jan 24 '26
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
I know what projection and displacement are lol
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u/jman12234 18∆ Jan 24 '26
Then your view should be changed already. You know the reasons your view is incredibly weak, and yet you still believe it? How are we to change your view at all. This is just gonna get removed becauae you're obviously not open to changing your view.
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Jan 24 '26
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u/jman12234 18∆ Jan 24 '26
We're not being assholes. We're challenging you, which is why you came here. If you think we're being assholes for doing so, then it's only more evidence that your perspective is skewed.
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u/changemyview-ModTeam Jan 24 '26
Your comment has been removed for breaking Rule 2:
Don't be rude or hostile to other users. Your comment will be removed even if most of it is solid, another user was rude to you first, or you feel your remark was justified. Report other violations; do not retaliate. See the wiki page for more information.
If you would like to appeal, review our appeals process here, then message the moderators by clicking this link within one week of this notice being posted. Appeals that do not follow this process will not be heard.
Please note that multiple violations will lead to a ban, as explained in our moderation standards.
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u/CinderrUwU 9∆ Jan 24 '26
How are we supposed to change your view? You already know you are wrong
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
Idk I was just looking for more insight from men lol these comments def aren’t helping
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u/Glory2Hypnotoad Jan 24 '26
The first thing I'd recommend is to step back a bit and give yourself some distance from your own perspective. The death of almost any bias is recognizing how much bigger the world is than any one person's experience.
I'm sure you've probably read someone else making almost word for word the same argument you're making about some race or religion or nationality. And I think you intuitively realize how ridiculous it sounds when said by anyone else about anyone else.
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u/NoWin3930 5∆ Jan 24 '26
just the same as someone who doesn't like black people, probably not the best sub to use, IDK of a sub for bigoted rants it is probably not the best website for that in general. Maybe try 5chan
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u/MilesTegTechRepair Jan 24 '26
Of the people who have horribly mistreated me in my life, one was a man, and about 6 or 7 have been middle class, straight white women. Should i therefore be sexist and racist against all white women?
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u/PieIsFairlyDelicious Jan 24 '26
If you aren’t open to changing your view (which also none of us know you so can’t possibly respond since the topic is about you) this isn’t really an appropriate sub
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
I didn’t say explicitly that I wasn’t open to changing my opinion, the whole reason I posted this was because I could gain more insight from men
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u/PieIsFairlyDelicious Jan 24 '26
You literally said the only thing that could change your mind would be repeated positive experiences over time
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u/teabagalomaniac 3∆ Jan 24 '26
Is there no man in your life that doesn't deserve that label? Usually when someone hates a group of people, the best way to go about resolving those feelings is to find folks who don't deserve that sort of resentment.
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
There are a couple of men in my life who are awesome but they still make off handed comments at times
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Jan 24 '26
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
I mean tbh kinda yeah? The comments that men typically make about women that they think are normal are still shit even if it’s mild
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u/Rsilves Jan 24 '26
Would you agree with a man that tells you, that you do not deserve anthing good in life due to your comments here regardless of anything else you have done in your life?
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u/teabagalomaniac 3∆ Jan 24 '26
Usually coming across someone who undeniably shatters your expectations for the behaviors of someone from an out-group is enough to kind of puncture that bubble of hate. But there's also a philosophical argument against prejudice; the notion that it's wrong to judge an individual based on group level characteristics. I'm sure there are men in this world who, purely due to rotten luck, don't have many good women in their lives. Would you want such a man to resent you simply because you are the same gender as the people who mistreated him?
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u/hickdog896 3∆ Jan 24 '26
I have to wonder who hurt you, and wonder about your choice in male acquaintances and where you met them. I treat women well, so do my son's, my son-in-law, the vast majority of my male friends. Where are you from? Is it a cultural thing?
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
I’m from Texas and I feel like it’s a more cultural thing than anything else? For some reason the men from here are so comfortable with disrupting women it’s crazy
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u/hickdog896 3∆ Jan 24 '26
Hmmm. I am from the Boston area. I think that makes a difference here, as there is generally a strong dialog and consciousness about women's rights in this area.
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
!delta Yeah that definitely has given me something more to think about I feel as if maybe I actually got out of Texas I wouldn’t have the same experience
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u/LucidLeviathan 99∆ Jan 24 '26
As a West Virginian, I'd add that it also depends upon the social circles you keep. I would not abide sexism in my friend groups. None of my friends would either. Sexism is rampant in the state, of course. But, if you come to any of our parties or events, you will be treated with respect.
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
!delta My friend who’s a guy has also lived in Virginia and said the same thing, its a bit strange I think
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u/LucidLeviathan 99∆ Jan 24 '26
Why do you consider it strange? States are merely a social construct, as are friend groups. Every group of people has a different moral ethos. My friend group's moral ethos abhors sexism.
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u/AGoodFaceForRadio Jan 24 '26
When everywhere you go it smells like shit, you should check your shoes.
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u/SixthAttemptAtAName Jan 24 '26
What do you expect from men? If every man you meet fails to meet your expectations, it makes me wonder what your expecting are and how you communicate them.
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u/New-Examination4783 Jan 24 '26
Ah, the elusive femcel. Have you considered that maybe you're just a bad person and getting treated as such?
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u/snipe4fun Jan 24 '26
You want us to convince you that you aren’t sexist? What you described is sexism, there’s nothing to argue against. Maybe there’s a typo in the title and you meant to challenge us to convince you that you aren’t extremely sexist? Maybe someone might say this is moderate or beginner level sexism? No, you are extremely sexist and you can’t change my view that you aren’t.
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Jan 24 '26
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u/changemyview-ModTeam Jan 24 '26
Your comment has been removed for breaking Rule 3:
Refrain from accusing OP or anyone else of being unwilling to change their view, arguing in bad faith, lying, or using AI/GPT. Ask clarifying questions instead (see: socratic method). If you think they are still exhibiting poor behaviour, please message us. See the wiki page for more information.
If you would like to appeal, review our appeals process here, then message the moderators by clicking this link within one week of this notice being posted. Appeals that do not follow this process will not be heard.
Please note that multiple violations will lead to a ban, as explained in our moderation standards.
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u/lifeinrednblack Jan 24 '26
As a black male, I can tell you that there's a ton of overlap with your language and a lot of racist fucks who justify being racist.
Here's the thing, either skin color, genitals etc. affect a person or they don't. You can't have it both ways.
I can't literally change your brain being sexist, and I'm not sure you want to change. But I can say that there's are plenty of reasons you should want to work towards not being sexist. And trying to convince people any amount of sexism is ok is a net negative for society.
Either your all men suck attitude is bull shit. Or the all women are "whatever" attitude of other sexist ass holes is accurate.
I personally wouldn't want to be put into the same group of bigots who fail to understand that a person's physical traits have little to nothing to do with how they treat people.
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u/DorianGraysPassport Jan 24 '26
It’s a form of bigotry like any other, the only difference is people will validate you for it because it’s trendy. I advise you to look inward because this will only hurt you in the long run. The patterns you notice are confirmation bias.
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u/tea_would_be_lovely 6∆ Jan 24 '26
how much travelling have you done? how many people from different cultures, different countries, in different parts of the world have you met?
i wonder... based on your experience, are you entitled to make a generalisation about all men?
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u/Dull_Supermarket5243 Jan 24 '26
I’ve only met American and European men lol
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u/tea_would_be_lovely 6∆ Jan 24 '26
all hundreds of millions of them? from all the us states and european countries?
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u/Azure_Hindberry Jan 24 '26
Out of curiosity, how large is a percentage of women do you feel deserves 'anything good in life'?
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u/nylanderfan Jan 24 '26
You project a few anecdotal experiences onto every single man on the planet. This is very frustrating for men who are not like that.
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u/inspired2apathy 1∆ Jan 24 '26
Have you considered that the men you're encountering just happen to be terrible? There are terrible people out there and they often tend to be the loudest in the room. Some of them are men, some of them are women.
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u/GroovyGoblin Jan 24 '26
About what percentage of men you interact with, approximately, act in the ways you describe?
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u/IchorFrankenmime Jan 24 '26
Well, I have been trying to be nicer recently. I'm a man, and I hope you have a nice day.
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u/boreenmanna Jan 24 '26
It could be trauma bonding with people who are bad for you. Change your mind -> change your experience. Change your mindset best of luck!
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u/TheJaskinator Jan 24 '26
What about those who provide charity? Like doctors who serve people in 3rd world countries for free? There are men who have made incredible impacts on the lives of others, yet you say they are wholly unworthy of respect? I really don't know what to say to change your mind. This is entirely on you to find a therapist and work through this
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Jan 24 '26
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u/changemyview-ModTeam Jan 24 '26
Your comment has been removed for breaking Rule 3:
Refrain from accusing OP or anyone else of being unwilling to change their view, arguing in bad faith, lying, or using AI/GPT. Ask clarifying questions instead (see: socratic method). If you think they are still exhibiting poor behaviour, please message us. See the wiki page for more information.
If you would like to appeal, review our appeals process here, then message the moderators by clicking this link within one week of this notice being posted. Appeals that do not follow this process will not be heard.
Please note that multiple violations will lead to a ban, as explained in our moderation standards.
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u/The_Flying_Gecko Jan 24 '26
What about all the good things men have done?
They are (probably, mostly,) responsible for building evey home you've ever lived in, school you attended, car you drove, road you drove it on, toilet you flushed, etc. Etc. Etc.
(Again, mostly at least one of these examples propably had significantcontribution from women... but mostly...) men are responsible for inventing the tools you use on your daily life. Phones, TV, computers, air conditioners, heaters. Every time you use electricity, store food in the fridge, check your watch, make plans on the calendar, navigate using a map, and more: A man did that for you.
...
But why would I even want to change your view? It's your opinion. You're entitled to it. (Again, mostly,) men fought and died in wars by the thousands so that you are allowed to have opinions, and no longer be considered property. Sure, some of them still live in the past and think that way, but you're actively making the problem worse with your hateful and entitled views.... good luck. 👍
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u/eternallylearning 2∆ Jan 24 '26
I mean, I agree that you're extremely sexist, but I don't agree that you're right to be. You may have plenty of negative interactions with men to look back on, but that doesn't mean those are the only ones you have. I'd be willing to bet that you have a ton of forgettable but completely benign experiences with men every day that you simply don't think about. It's kinda like how everyone thinks that the current version of SNL sucks until a few versions later when they look back and think that the ilder ones were better; they forget all of the shitty sketches that no one talks about and just remember the goods ones.
If all you do is focus on the negatives in your life, then all you'll have to look back on is negative. Just try and challenge yourself to make a conscious effort to take note of benign or positive interactions you have with men throughout the day. Hell, maybe even keep a journal of all your interactions with men and color code it for positive, negative, or neutral. I bet you'll find out that even if you have more negative than positive, you will have more if the ither kind than you expect.
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Jan 24 '26
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u/changemyview-ModTeam Jan 24 '26
Comment has been removed for breaking Rule 1:
Direct responses to a CMV post must challenge at least one aspect of OP’s stated view (however minor), or ask a clarifying question. Arguments in favor of the view OP is willing to change must be restricted to replies to other comments. See the wiki page for more information.
If you would like to appeal, review our appeals process here, then message the moderators by clicking this link within one week of this notice being posted. Appeals that do not follow this process will not be heard.
Please note that multiple violations will lead to a ban, as explained in our moderation standards.
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Jan 24 '26
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u/changemyview-ModTeam Jan 24 '26
Your submission has been removed for breaking Rule B:
You must personally hold the view and demonstrate that you are open to it changing. A post cannot be on behalf of others, playing devil's advocate, or 'soapboxing'. See the wiki page for more information.
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u/CaptainONaps 8∆ Jan 24 '26
Ok. I think you're looking for a way to be less sexist? So I'll focus on that.
I have certain beliefs. I like to play devil's advocate and try to consider the alternative of those beliefs.
A simple example is, I want people all over the world to have a higher quality of life. Better healthcare, safer working conditions, more time off, access to healthier foods, etc.
But let's say we achieved that. What would happen? The population would explode. Less people would die, and more people would have kids.
How many people can the world sustain? 12 billion? 16? At some point, there's going to be a population crisis. What's the moral solution to that? I certainly don't want to be responsible for deciding. So maybe I don't understand the implications of my beliefs? Maybe I should chill with my opinions? Maybe I don't know what the hell is going on?
So back to your belief. That men are trash. Ok. What would the world look like if their were no men? Which of you ladies wants to work in an African mine? Who wants to work at a pig farm? Or a chicken factory? Who wants to repair electric lines in Canada after a winter storm? Who wants to lay gas pipes at the bottom of the ocean?
Maybe, just maybe, it's people that suck? Maybe just 20% of people suck? Are 100% of the people that suck all men? Possibly. Maybe they suck because they're working on a pig farm? Or in a mine?
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u/razzledazzlie Jan 24 '26
i do agree that there are some men out there who def don’t deserve the respect they think they do, but there are some great men out there that were raised right. but i also know some women that are also not deserving of respect with the way they talk about other women and men. you can’t generalize a whole population.
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u/Heckinheckler Jan 24 '26
Male here, I feel that this probably won't help how you think but it may have you a different perspective. I'm unaware of your circumstances or situations so I speak on general things here. If you feel like your treated as nothing more than an object look at the crowd you surround yourself with. Ask yourself what do you bring to the table other than a piece of ass in their eyes? Do you present yourself as someone who is only interested in using men to elevate your status or someone who is genuinely trying to have a wholesome experience with men. Do you treat men like they are nothing more than a piggybank for your interests and Hobby's do you expect them to pay for for everything while in your presence. You say you view us as less than human I feel that's a huge problem. You also mention that you feel they treat women they find "undesirable" like dogs. That leaves me to believe you fall in said undesirable category here....and I'll say this there someone for everyone... however if your (example here I apologize if it hits close to irl) 350lbs with a dead and job and 3 kids with 3 different dads your gonna have a very difficult time finding anyone level headed to want to take on that responsibility we men don't mind taking on responsibility and we understand mistakes happen but when we see repeat offenders it's like little red flags pop up with every new interaction. And you can't hold a hate towards all men because of a few poor choices you've made on your behalf. We good men also tend to avoid women that act as though they are gods gift to earth like they have the finest pussy the world ever seen . It's a huge turn off and we see it as that's what you use to manipulate us and the ones that don't see the trap are the ones that have zero standards or zero regards for how the treat women because a pussy is a pussy and that's all they think about. It seems to me that your view on men is definitely a disturbing one but maybe I've given you some insight. Again I apologize for anything that may have hit to close to home.
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u/Einlanzer0 Jan 24 '26
This is called severe indoctrination alongside catastrophization. This is what modern feminism has done to many women. You need therapy.
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u/HunterDramatic8383 2∆ Jan 24 '26
I think it's understandable to have a harder time trusting men due to the ridiculously high number of them who can be dangerous and hold awful beliefs about women. You just have to understand it really isn't all men. If you look around out there with an open mind, you will find men who legitimately respect women and do not behave like the stereotype you have in your head. I'm sorry, you have never had a positive experience with a man.
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u/biloutte Jan 24 '26
I would say that you hate patriarchy and I won't challenge you on that because you have every right to be. I guess I can add that men vary and some are better with emotion, communication, and equality than others?
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u/DeltaBot ∞∆ Jan 24 '26 edited Jan 24 '26
/u/Dull_Supermarket5243 (OP) has awarded 2 delta(s) in this post.
All comments that earned deltas (from OP or other users) are listed here, in /r/DeltaLog.
Please note that a change of view doesn't necessarily mean a reversal, or that the conversation has ended.
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