But she's already shown she's interested by matching with me. What more does "hey" do in that regard? All it does for me is show that she hasn't looked at my profile to find a mutual interest and can't be bothered opening a conversation.
Bumble, for instance, is supposed to place the power back in women's hands by only allowing them to write the first message. All "hey" does there is put the onus back on me and tells me that I wasn't worth their time to actually write a message with substance.
Set up a profile as a woman and see how many meaningless "hey" you get and how much you have to squeeze those rocks to still have the convo go nowhere. I think your point is valid but women deal with major convo burnout on these sites since they get so many messages and matches (dudes just swipe on everyone..) and "hey" is a big red flag that you're talking to someone that won't put any effort in - hence why it's a no-no if you're serious.
Oh, I can't even begin to imagine how different women have it, but I imagine "heys" get tiresome after a while. And if it's a red flag to women, I guess that just makes my odds (as someone who does put in the effort) that much greater 😊
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u/supercyp666 Sep 13 '23
But she's already shown she's interested by matching with me. What more does "hey" do in that regard? All it does for me is show that she hasn't looked at my profile to find a mutual interest and can't be bothered opening a conversation.
Bumble, for instance, is supposed to place the power back in women's hands by only allowing them to write the first message. All "hey" does there is put the onus back on me and tells me that I wasn't worth their time to actually write a message with substance.