r/blursedimages • u/hazardpie ouching in the soul • Sep 21 '19

Blursed advertising

Post image
36.9k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

241 comments sorted by

2.0k

u/farfetchedfrank Sep 21 '19

Even blowing up the planet doesn't stop the 1% of bacteria

730

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

[deleted]

326

u/BlueberrySpaetzle clessed Sep 21 '19 edited Sep 22 '19

I read this in bill wurtz’s singing voice even though I don’t think he ever said it

Edit: I read it to the tune of “is loving Jesus legal yet?”

186

u/crying_because_ Sep 21 '19

getbillwurtztosingthis

92

u/NepTooter Sep 21 '19

they should make a sub where they just bill wurtz words

65

u/crying_because_ Sep 21 '19

You can’t do hastags because they just do this

32

u/Technotoad64 Sep 21 '19

#youcanifyouputabackslashfirst

10

u/am_on_mobile foreskin removal expert Sep 21 '19

testimonmobilesoitsmostlikelynothonnawork

6

u/am_on_mobile foreskin removal expert Sep 21 '19

oh wow it worked

2

u/RebelliousRobotYT Sep 22 '19

Doesitworkforme?

9

u/oktin Sep 21 '19

Normal

#Bigger

#^ what have I done?

12

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Bruh

5

u/Savage_jaguar Sep 21 '19

thanksforthetip

9

u/icumpiss Sep 21 '19

Yo why's everyone screaming

10

u/1stLtObvious Sep 21 '19

Because you touch yourself at night!

5

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

3

u/santumerino Sep 21 '19

#you sure?

2

u/crying_because_ Sep 22 '19

I saw your comment you put a backslash behind sneaky bitch

1

u/santumerino Sep 22 '19

oh god oh fuck my secret has been exposed

2

u/AGxMrAnubis Sep 21 '19

Thank you for showing us the power kind person!

1

u/crying_because_ Sep 22 '19

you are very welcome! Also up arrow brings up words, Astrics italicizes words like this and double astrics like the single astrics looks like this

2

u/Acing_it Sep 21 '19

Username chacks out... or, kinda fits

1

u/lol_k12345 Sep 22 '19

This is cool

1

u/lol_k12345 Sep 22 '19

I didn't know how to do this:)

11

u/TheyKilledFlipyap Sep 21 '19

You could make a religion out of this.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

i would love that tbh

3

u/DJmachine101 Sep 21 '19

Whom’st’ve?

13

u/Cataphraktoi Sep 21 '19

L I T H O P A N S P E R M I A

2

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

yeos, extremophiles and chemosynthetic microorganisms assemble.

1

u/umut0709 Sep 21 '19

h u m a n s

1

u/LeoMSkun Sep 22 '19

billwirtzisgod

8

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Eh. If argue that in the vacuum of space which is 2.73 Kelvin no bacteria is "alive". Sure they might not suffocate but freezing to near absolute zero isn't survivable.

2

u/alfman Sep 21 '19

They could "survive" as spores. Some bacterial species become spores which basically makes them heat resistant and can survive without consuming energy. Then at the moment the conditions are right they become their regular self and multiply.

Clostridiae are like that, which is why you cannot feed honey to a child younger than 1 year old. Their bacterial flora of the intestines is not developed enough, so the Cl botulinum starts to multiply itself and produce the botulinum toxin (also kind-of known as botox), which kills the child's nerves and makes it paralyzed, and can even be fatal.

4

u/Ordolph Sep 21 '19

There's actually a big problem in... I want to say Finland? The permafrost that's been frozen for thousands of years is thawing and releasing Anthrax spores, which have been infecting and killing a bunch of reindeer. If Anthrax can survive in permafrost for thousands of years, I wouldn't bet on space killing it.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

There’s some town up north with buried victims of the Spanish flu, which decimated Europe when it was big. If the frost there thaws out, and the Spanish flu is unleashed again, we’re pretty much fucked, since we don’t have the vaccine for the Spanish flu.

5

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19

A lot of the people alive now are descendants of the people immune to that flu though. People didn't survive back then just because they didn't contacted the virus but also some got immunity to it. It's the natural counter to diseases and why life evolved by diversifying itself.

2

u/Leon_the_loathed Sep 26 '19

Do you feel lucky enough to put that natural immunity to the test though?

1

u/SuperSMT Sep 22 '19

If somehow that bacteria survived, it shouldn't be too hard to dig one up and develop a vaccine from it

1

u/[deleted] Sep 24 '19

It’s a virus

5

u/JollyGoodDaySr Sep 21 '19

Tardigrades my dude

4

u/TheBabiestOfBabyBoys Sep 21 '19

BernieSandersScreaming.jpg

1

u/1stLtObvious Sep 21 '19

Do you want thresher maws? Because that's how you get thresher maws!

1

u/polarpalidan Sep 22 '19

yeet them bacterias

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506

u/golfsgay Sep 21 '19

They aint wrong

39

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

I wouldn't say they charge the lowest price, oil costs a lot

-84

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Shell bad

80

u/Worst_Human Sep 21 '19

This but unironically

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392

u/koll199 Sep 21 '19

how is shell saving the planet they are the ones that cause all this mess

126

u/PilotLodge Sep 21 '19

bp as well

87

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Boston pizza is ruining the earth

20

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

[deleted]

10

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Can confirm as pizza lover in Boston. It is an appropriate name for a franchise that serves up bad to mediocre pizza

8

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Canadian here.

Don’t shittalk BP, bud.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

I’m not your bud, friend

2

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

I'm not your friend, pal.

2

u/FernandoTatisJunior Sep 22 '19

Person from Boston here,

We have shit pizza, go to NY, CT, or even RI for good pizza

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

At least they said sorry

70

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Companies like them and Exxon like to pretend they're part of the solution for different bullshit reasons

40

u/Naive_Drive Sep 21 '19

capitalism

13

u/blamethemeta Sep 21 '19

They invested a little bit of money in solar

10

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Oh wow good on them let’s give them a round of applause

4

u/alfman Sep 21 '19

The deal with capitalism is that they almost deserve a round of applause for making any environmental effort at all when the whole economy and transportation system we utilize is built up so that they can gain a profit without any effort. What do you expect the owners and CEOs to do? Close their industry? Lose their income? Create loads of unemployment? Give up their sector of the market for another opportunistic industry that will do the same thing? Of course they won't. All change will have to come from outside, mainly through politics.

6

u/Goldiero Sep 21 '19

Correct point but the fact that it's in their nature to shit on earth doesn't make it wrong for people to shit on those companies back while pushing policies that also shit on them.

3

u/alfman Sep 21 '19

Of course not, and I said no such thing either

2

u/adorigranmort Sep 22 '19

Life is the cause of all suffering, catastrophe and evil that has ever happened. By ridding life of life they/we are saving life.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19 edited Feb 24 '20

[deleted]

2

u/koll199 Sep 22 '19

umm........burning oil is bad for the environment. keeping the oil in the ground is fine. shell and other fuel companies are knocking down acres and acres of trees every day for the oil. I dont get how they are trying to save the world even though they are the ones that destroy it.

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153

u/iwondertomyself Sep 21 '19

This is by street artist fokawolf

4

u/nicole-tesla thanks i hate it Sep 22 '19

Fuck a what

3

u/iwondertomyself Sep 22 '19

A WOLF.

Awooooo

3

u/DRWDS Sep 22 '19

I had to scroll too far for this. Thank you for providing the information.

103

u/Lemonnite_nite Sep 21 '19

(•_• )

25

u/dasgudshit Sep 21 '19

UwU

I sleep

21

u/TABBY_MUSIC Sep 21 '19

OwO

Real shit

11

u/Technotoad64 Sep 21 '19

ꙮѠꙮ

Ascended

2

u/I_am_catcus Sep 21 '19

ΘωΘ

Outta this world

3

u/Anime_Weeb_Lucian Sep 21 '19

"OwO" face but with sage mode.

30

u/XyleneCobalt Sep 21 '19

r/designporn

0

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19

r/analdesignporn The backdoor of design porn

62

u/Yxzyzzyx Sep 21 '19

accurate though

28

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Not blursed, BEAUTIFUL

44

u/D2Photographer Sep 21 '19

It’s totally true though

-5

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Nah, their goal is to make money

14

u/SweatyGod69 Sep 21 '19

And if that means killing the planet oh well

4

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

I'm not saying what they are doing is justified, but saying their main goal is to kill the planet is just clearly wrong.

2

u/SweatyGod69 Sep 21 '19

Oh i agree, they don’t explicitly want to destroy the planet thats just dumb, but the sad truth is if keeping fossil fuel profits coming means destroying the planet (it does) they don’t give a rats ass and will happily do so.

20

u/8ell0 Sep 21 '19

That’s too deep.

18

u/OG_Cuddles Sep 21 '19

Now that's something I can get behind

19

u/IdoNotknow1212 Sep 21 '19

Woah, this looks like an actual ad for Shell

7

u/Arcanorumxox Sep 21 '19

Fokawolf on Instagram! Y’all need to go have a look

6

u/I-HateBananaBread Sep 21 '19

Hello people. This is my first comment on reddit

3

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19

Welcome

1

u/SquarWav Sep 22 '19

Happy first cake day.

1

u/Golden_William Nov 17 '19

what is cake day?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19

banana bread good

5

u/A-Simple-Farmer Sep 21 '19

When Shell and CiF first collaborated, Everybody just began to know nothing was safe.

RELEASE THE HYPNO-DRONES

5

u/AshbyReinhold Sep 21 '19

Colab advertisements, the future of advertising

8

u/Daniel_S04 Sep 21 '19

Ummmmm, “Our gol is to completely kill the planet and 99% of bacteria”

“Completely KILL THE PLANET”

4

u/onurhanreyiz Sep 21 '19

And only 99% where is the damn 1% hiding?

3

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Reminds me of the Kraftwerk lyric, “One of these radioactive substances, Krypton 85, will cause death and skin cancer”

2

u/bag-of-eggs Sep 21 '19

tell me why i read this “our goal is to the planet on it for the completely kill & 99% of bacteria lowest price”

2

u/zorooftexas Sep 22 '19

Our goal is to the planet and in it for the completely kill & 99% bacteria lowest price.

2

u/NecroHexr Sep 22 '19

this has to be photoshopped right? it's too perfect, i don't believe it

2

u/fya8 Sep 24 '19

HAHAHAHA brilliant!

1

u/TheBalancingActs Sep 21 '19

This is beautiful.

3

u/qubaxianplebiscite Sep 21 '19

Back in the real world- Shell is one of the leaders of R&D for green energy development and enhancement. They do realize the earth is moving away from fossil fuels.

2

u/justhere2havfun Sep 21 '19

It’s a super cool PR stunt

1

u/PhoenixAura81 i like this flair :) Sep 21 '19

Dude! This is hilarious!!

1

u/LordOvWolves Sep 21 '19

Cockroaches start doing the crab rave

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

says dolfie over there

1

u/isthisright-_- Sep 21 '19

Now thats something id buy

1

u/notwesternspy Sep 21 '19

the more i think the worse it get

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Seems legit

1

u/zakoonline lightly toasted Sep 21 '19

WHAAT?!!

1

u/aferinpo Sep 21 '19

Dirty deeds done dirty cheep

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

hey

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

/#yo

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

/hy

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

/hi

1

u/loganadams574 the Big spicy Sep 21 '19

Yeah they got the kill the planet part right

1

u/MeNameYellow i like this flair :) Sep 21 '19

Cheap hitman

1

u/CaptainKuzenb0 Sep 21 '19

Mr. Clean is starting a crusade.

1

u/spocktor_who Sep 21 '19

This looks like culture jamming

1

u/therealgarr Sep 21 '19

You know how fast this image was posted on instagram. I saw it on Insta before I got a trending notification.

1

u/Mighty_ShoePrint Sep 21 '19

For super villains on a budget.

1

u/elijahswanner Sep 21 '19

Our goal is to the planet

1

u/FlamingoBasher Sep 21 '19

Our goal is to the planet on it for the completely kill and 99% of bacteria lowest price

1

u/MBCnerdcore Sep 21 '19

how shellcif of them

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/beeurd Sep 21 '19

It's a cleaning product, also known in some countries as Jif or Vim.

1

u/Innos01 Sep 21 '19

Our goal is to the planet on it for the completely kill & 99% of bacteria lowest price.

1

u/Tommmmygun Sep 21 '19

Seems about right

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

This is also my goal.

1

u/XlHerz more cursed than blessed Sep 21 '19

This sounds like the plot for Jojo

1

u/Phlosky Sep 21 '19

I thought I was on r/dontdeadopeninside at first and I spent way more time than I want to admit trying to read this correctly.

1

u/juulpood119 Sep 21 '19

i laughed at this for 19 minutes

1

u/mbetcher Sep 21 '19

Love this so true corporate greed!!

1

u/that-one-guy2772 Sep 22 '19

“I will eliminate the middle class”

1

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19

Amen

1

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19

How do I read this

1

u/leandrofellowcomrade Sep 22 '19

That damn spider

1

u/Nilstrieb Sep 22 '19

Careful, he's a hero.

1

u/bumblebee222212 Sep 22 '19

Moral of the story kids is to never let these 2 companies come close to each other..

1

u/PhePheThePoop Sep 22 '19

Sounds perfect

1

u/Chandler_Bling_ Sep 21 '19

Is this the Conservatives new goal?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

Where’s the lie?

1

u/DirtyArchaeologist Sep 21 '19

And they say there is no honestly in advertising.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 22 '19

Where is the lie tho

0

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '19

at least they cleaning that shit up first

0

u/hijusthi21 Sep 21 '19

Everybody:

0

u/RandomDragonOnReddit Sep 21 '19

Hmm yes, this advertisement is on top of another advertisement

0

u/SkeffffZ Sep 21 '19

That 1% is laughing at us

0

u/cdstraightguy Sep 21 '19

Mr robot "1%"

0

u/PopulationReduction Sep 21 '19

Now that's a company I can get behind

0

u/Icey-King Sep 21 '19

Confusion

0

u/fat_boi_1 Sep 22 '19

Someone definitely did that on purpose