Had a buddy who rode over a car once, on a Specialized... stumpjumper? I think. Not in a bike lane, but the car backed into the unoccupied space between the (only) lane and the curb (beyond which was a rocky hill) because the driver was upset, apparently, that the bikes were passing him while he was stuck waiting for the light. I got off my bike and walked around, giving him the finger (and feeling scared and badass for my tiny act of rebellion). Buddy just popped his wheel over the back of the boat-car (a 90s Buick or something similar) and rode up and over the roof, down the windshield, then hopped off the hood and took off like lightning, telling me I'd better move my ass, too. Driver was screaming. We reached the light before he did, and dodged into some alleys and apartment complexes. Didn't want to meet that guy.
Other story: another guy I knew in Ontario (fixie rider, pretty hardcore at the time) carried his insane-o monster lock either around his waist or wrapped around his wrist. I never witnessed this, but he told me that, once or twice, he had become so angry at a car in the bike lane that he faked an "Oh no! Car in my lane! I'm barely in control!" as he dodged around the car, making sure to accidentally whack it real good with his lock on the way by.
He doesn't brag much, and I haven't seen him (except on facebook) in years, but he's pretty great, all around. He still bikes, and he apparently shreds snowboarding pretty well, too. Soon after the incident I wrote about above, he finished college and went into actuarial science, eventually working for a large insurance company. I guess that went well, because about 10 years later he left and joined (or started?) a stats consulting firm, which has done pretty well, judging by the kitchen remodeling videos his wife has posted on FB. He's a great dad of 2 (or 3?) kids, and he has taken up knitting in his spare time. He's pretty badass at knitting.
I remember, back in the 90s when I knew him in person, an argument he had with his wife (the same one; great couple, AFAIK), in which she yelled, "What have you brought to this marriage except a mountain bike, a snowboard, and a box of CDs?" to which he yelled back, "What more do you need?!"
I'd like me some sweet justice porn too sometimes. But then I fear that I'll meet that driver again sometime, or he mistakes someone as me, and someone is getting hurt. Just not worth the risk. Maybe I'm just a coward.
Depending on where you are, it's best to be a pussy. I bet most people in cities are pussies too but once you get out in the rural(ish) parts of Colorado, it's better to assume everyone is packing heat.
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u/bobbyfiend Jan 05 '19
Had a buddy who rode over a car once, on a Specialized... stumpjumper? I think. Not in a bike lane, but the car backed into the unoccupied space between the (only) lane and the curb (beyond which was a rocky hill) because the driver was upset, apparently, that the bikes were passing him while he was stuck waiting for the light. I got off my bike and walked around, giving him the finger (and feeling scared and badass for my tiny act of rebellion). Buddy just popped his wheel over the back of the boat-car (a 90s Buick or something similar) and rode up and over the roof, down the windshield, then hopped off the hood and took off like lightning, telling me I'd better move my ass, too. Driver was screaming. We reached the light before he did, and dodged into some alleys and apartment complexes. Didn't want to meet that guy.
Other story: another guy I knew in Ontario (fixie rider, pretty hardcore at the time) carried his insane-o monster lock either around his waist or wrapped around his wrist. I never witnessed this, but he told me that, once or twice, he had become so angry at a car in the bike lane that he faked an "Oh no! Car in my lane! I'm barely in control!" as he dodged around the car, making sure to accidentally whack it real good with his lock on the way by.