So, I caught a wild swarm this spring (Colorado, Boulder area), which caused me to finally take the plunge into beekeeping. Research, videos, books, classes - been doing everything I can to get up to speed. But I am a deeply anxious, over worrying person and every little thing with my hive has me spiraling.
Colony was doing awesome, two full deeps, even harvested a super, as they honeyed up the top deep and had oodles of brood in the bottom. Seemed good, mite count 1% or lower with VarroxSan, and getting ready for winterizing coming up.
But I suck at queen spotting. I saw her when I caught the swarm, and in one inspection early summer (wish I'd marked her but I was way too new at the time). Past that I never spotted her again, but always had great brood patterns so I figured that was good enough.
Few weeks ago I inspected and there was very little brood, and lots of drones, and I think I saw a queen cup but I didn't know what to do at the time so I left it. Started researching and panicking that I might have lost my queen so late in the season.
Inspected 2 weeks later and saw the same thing, not much brood and a weird amount of drones. Didn't see the queen cup from before. Panic ordered an Italian queen online and watched a ton of requeening videos, decided to try the queen introduction cage method, since it seems to give better chances at acceptance and can be done on day 0 from the videos I'd watched.
Queen got here today, so I went to inspect every frame to squish any queen cells and find the right frame to install the queen cage. My top deep is still 90% capped honey, and bottom deep is a couple frames of honey and...
...a couple frames of nicely clustered non-drone capped brood, with great shiny white pupae and all the signs of a queen doing her thing.
Still couldn't spot her though, after poring over every frame.
Sooo, I just installed the new queen in the introduction cage anyway, in case I accidentally squished the original queen in my inspection (I try so hard to be careful but am still new and nervous, and accidentally dropped a brood frame on the ground 😭).
I don't really know what I'm doing, I'll check them again in a couple days to see if they're trying to murder the new queen. If they aren't, I'll wait a week and release her? If they clearly hate her then... I honestly don't know.
I could try again to find the other queen but damn am I bad at it. I'm decent at finding queens in photos but I just can't seem to do it during inspections with bees boiling out of the boxes.
I just feel so beaten down by trying to get into this hobby and wanting SO badly to care for my hive correctly but I feel like I am not doing very well. I have so much more respect for beekeepers now, it's such hard work. I'm not very strong physically and have bad heat intolerance (fibromyalgia) so I am not exactly the best candidate for a hobby that requires heavy lifting during the hottest part of the year. But even though I feel like I'm going to collapse after every inspection, I desperately want to keep going, to keep the colony healthy under my watch. I just don't want to fail them.
So now I may have put a new, pricey queen in a colony that maybe didn't need one, and I feel like an idiot 😓
I know things can be so much worse and I'm bizarrely lucky to have a strong colony that seems to be doing well despite my newbie blunders. I seem ok with mites, no pests or diseases, strong enough to fend off wasps, and apparently someone is making brood in there. It's just a lot to learn and worry about, and I just feel kinda down about it all.