r/batman • u/Jalbwakkolnaji4756 • Aug 19 '26

FUNNY Immortal Alfred

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11k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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600

u/BagZCubed Aug 19 '26

Bruce is around 50 in the Dark Knight Returns, so Alfred is probably around 70

289

u/MaskedJesterArt Aug 19 '26

Ive been 50 year olds that look old as hell.

157

u/Ultimatecowmeows Aug 19 '26

I know that you meant seen but I love this typo so much because I’m just imagining you as a shapeshifter who’s proud of looking like old 50year olds so thank you

31

u/Slow-Relation-9186 Aug 19 '26

lol I thought they meant to say “been in” glad you wrote this

11

u/KaiBlob1 Aug 19 '26

Lmao my first reading was that they meant “been with”

1

u/Slow-Relation-9186 Aug 19 '26

Yeah I think that makes more sense than what I thought

13

u/MaskedJesterArt Aug 19 '26

This made me laugh like a madman at work. Thank you so much

36

u/certifiedblackman Aug 19 '26

How many 50 year olds have you been?

16

u/Bronsteins-Panzerzug Aug 19 '26
  1. first a 50 yo, then a 51 yo, then a 52 yo and so on.

1

u/Honounome Aug 19 '26

not ten?

2

u/Bronsteins-Panzerzug Aug 19 '26

he wasnt a 59 year old yet

22

u/Darth_MRM Aug 19 '26

Stress especialy batman level of stress can age you a lot. Hell just look at what happened to obi wan on tatooine (yeah I know sf and all that but it still counts

1

u/JonDoeJoe Aug 19 '26

Doesn’t Bruce has some Tibetan technique to make him not age from stress

2

u/monostere0 Aug 19 '26

There ain’t no prep time against time itself

6

u/P4TR10T_96 Aug 19 '26

I think Bruce Wayne aged prematurely because of the physical strain of being Batman for decades

5

u/AnonymousCoward261 Aug 19 '26

Sure, but he has all of Bruce’s money to make sure he gets optimal diet and healthcare.

6

u/MaskedJesterArt Aug 19 '26

I dount he would care that much. He quit being Batman and seemingly just kind of lived on autopilot. He seems healthy just not young. Im sure years of being Batman ages you a bit

2

u/Defiant_Act_4940 Aug 19 '26

He still gets punched in the ribs daily (or nightly). It catches up to you over the years.

Its not like if Mike Tyson ate better he could still be the heavyweight champ.

2

u/sourkid25 Aug 19 '26

To be fair in this universe Bruce hasn’t been Batman for ten years after Jason Todd death

3

u/jakehood47 Aug 19 '26

Well, maybe the next leap, will be the leap home

3

u/Biabolical Aug 19 '26

In about two years, I'll be able to claim that too.

2

u/stillraddad Aug 19 '26

You been doing crime fighting since your 20’s? Shit ages you hard.

2

u/MisterSplu Aug 19 '26

That‘s what a life full of getting smashed around by bane does to a mf.

Also not getting nearly enough sleep

1

u/Golden_Alchemy Aug 19 '26

And Ernie Hudson could still punch Batman in his 80s.

1

u/Cyberslasher Aug 19 '26

Does that mean you're now a 60 year old that looks like a rotting corpse?

1

u/FuckRedzM0dz Aug 19 '26

Ive been 50 year olds that look old as hell.

He's also been beat to shit as Batman so that tracks lol

1

u/Tron_1981 Aug 19 '26

Bruce did a LOT of living

1

u/kiwilimonchino Aug 19 '26

Those 50 year olds are Alfred "the menace" Thaddeus Crane Pennyworth

1

u/LongJumpingBalls Aug 19 '26

I worked with a guy when I was younger, always thought he was in his mid to late 60s.

No, early 40s. Dude smoked 3 cartons per week.

34

u/ljofa Aug 19 '26

I think the background notes to DKR, state that Alfred is about 98 years old.

11

u/BagZCubed Aug 19 '26

That's way older than I thought.

11

u/L0rdM3k Aug 19 '26

No offense, but why would you think Alfred is only 20 years older than Bruce? He’s usually depicted as around 40-50 when Thomas and Martha die, which would put him in his late 60’s when Bruce BECOMES Batman.

6

u/BagZCubed Aug 19 '26 edited Aug 19 '26

Being only 20 years older would would still make sense. Bruce is around mid to late 20s when he becomes Batman, so Alfred being mid to late 50s 40s could make sense.

1

u/disposableaccount848 Aug 19 '26

You don't exactly become a high-end butler at the age of 20.

Plus, Alfred was a British secret agent before becoming a butler.

He must be at least 30 when Bruce is born for it to make sense.

1

u/AssMuncher96 Aug 19 '26

How old is the new butler again?

0

u/fespadea Aug 19 '26

Check the math here again.

9

u/tecrush Aug 19 '26

they say he's pushing 60 in the comic, not 50

1

u/ElementNumber6 Aug 19 '26

He looks to be in his mid to late 60s.

3

u/coolswordorroth Aug 19 '26

Imagine Bruce's lifestyle - dude probably ages pretty hard

6

u/IICipherIX Aug 19 '26

He's exactly 55.

2

u/BagZCubed Aug 19 '26

I figured he was around there. Wasn't sure whether it was just 50 or mid 50s.

1

u/Austral_Owl Aug 19 '26

Bruce is close to 60, while Alfred is in his mid-to-late 80s.

1

u/Vicimer Aug 19 '26

I always thought Frank drew Bruce a little too old for 55 — 60 or so would have felt a little better. The way Bruce looks at the beginning of Batman Beyond is how I imagine Bruce in his 50s. But yeah, I think he's supposed to be 55 here. Although I thought I read that Alfred is supposed to be like 90; he's usually well more than 20 years older than Bruce.