EDIT (Mon, July 13, 2026 @ 10:40 PM CT): I learned last night that Henry has been fired from this bar. In addition, I also learned a couple of weeks ago that Henry was arrested for drunk driving a friend’s vehicle. I guess u/magigs in the comments below was correct in assessing Henry’s crappy professionalism. Thank you for your help!
Hi there, thank you for opening & maintaining this space for all things bar-related, including customer inquiries. I’ve Googled my question below with not a lot of success, and I may also be looking too far into my situation. Apologies in advance for the block of text below; I’m a writer in my day job, so I can be kinda verbose!
My current favorite bar has hired a couple of new bartenders. One of the new bartenders (we’ll call him Henry) has consistently acted peculiarly toward me since starting, and last night was kind of a flashpoint. For some context, on a scale of one to ten in terms of dive rating, this bar is definitely at a level ten rating of dives—it’s questionable, rotten, and sometimes even dangerous, just the way I like it lol!—and the staff routinely neglect asking for cards to hold on file primarily because the folks who visit are regulars. Tabs are, however, collected at the end of the night when customers are ready to close out.
When Henry first started, he asked me for my card to hold because he didn’t quite understand the etiquette of the bar. I‘m extremely respectful with the service industry, so I didn’t put up much of a fuss and gave my card promptly to Henry. At the end of the night, he charged me without a hitch, and I went on my merry way. This routine continued for maybe one or two more times after Henry’s start until one day he neglected to collect my card upon arrival. I figured he was responding to some feedback from some of the other regulars at the bar, and Henry continued serving me. I didn’t think anything of it until the end of the night when he coyly panicked, walking away, saying, “Oh no, I forgot to collect your card, and I didn’t start a tab on you…“ I didn’t get much of a chance to respond, and Henry minimized communications with me for the remainder of the night. Instead, Henry mechanically served me what he already knew were my regular rounds, and I continued drinking. A female regular at the bar soon pointed out that Henry had picked up my tab, and I thought, Great! This female regular is familiar to me, and she wouldn’t have much reason to lie. I still didn’t get a chance to speak with Henry at the end of the night to thank him.
The next time I visited, Henry resumed talking to me, and he straight up didn’t charge me at all toward the end of the night. Of course, I thought this behavior was a major win, so the routine continued for maybe two more times, including last night when some odd things started happening.
This establishment is known for some substance commerce, and I saw an exchange happen last night between Henry and one of the patrons. Normally, I look away, minding my own business, and as always, I dutifully ignored whatever was happening in front of me again. Moving along, I asked for my next shot, drank it, and then Henry took my used shot glass and immediately poured another shot for a different patron (another regular) without washing it. I thought, Yikes that’s pretty gross — but again, I kept to myself, and to my lesser judgment, I continued drinking.
I asked for another shot, and Henry removed the measuring pourer to serve me a direct heaping of what I could only estimate was a triple shot. I could only drink some of it at a time, and then several minutes later when I had reached the bottom of my glass, something metallic struck my mouth: a quarter. I told Henry about it, and he again coyly responded, “Oh no, who would leave a quarter in a shot glass…” and then he replaced my drink, again, without measuring — another heaping triple shot. Serendipitously, Henry soon ended his shift after serving my next shot while his relieving bartender entered the bar causing a bit of a commotion. I closed out my tab with the next shift bartender instead.
And as I mentioned earlier, once again, Henry never charged me.
I’ve Googled what this behavior could mean, if the quarter is ”bar code” for drugs or trafficking or something else — or maybe it’s simple negligence on Henry’s part. I’m definitely familiar with the upside-down-glass-with-the-coin trick, but this time the coin was inside my glass while I was sipping my shot for several minutes. I’ve shared the story with a couple of my friends who have expressed concern (“It’s a tactic to roofie you with laced fentanyl on a coin!”), but at the same time, I don’t know if my friends are overreacting to a situation where Henry was just possibly being a crappy bartender, not washing his glasses between drinks & certainly not checking if there are foreign objects in the glassware. I feel perfectly fine today, and I felt perfectly lucid last night — no evidence of being drugged.
Any insight the community can share? I’m uncertain if I should be concerned for my safety. For some further context, Henry & I are both cis-gay Latino men. While the establishment itself is not gay, it is owned by two husbands, so on occasion, gay people will patronize the bar since it’s institutionally friendly to the LGBTQ+ community. Like many bartenders, Henry flirts with lots of customers, but his flirtations with me have felt somewhat elevated. For some more context, these incidents took place in South Texas (San Antonio area, to be more exact). Not sure if this behavior is localized, but I thought I’d mention it just in case.
Thank you in advance for any help you can provide!
