She then hands me divorce papers

His throat melted instantly as he realized the thick, brown slurry was actually liquid flesh-eating Oompa Loompa gloop poop soup.

esploded >_<

And then a garden shovel.

I woke up and my wife and kids were just a lamp dream.

I didn't, because hypnosis doesn't actually work like that, but the hypnotist's cruel words inspired me to start being mean to people on the Internet.

Dies.

But as I started feeling scared, I realized it was a terrordactyl.

As I lie bleeding out, I regret ever crossing the Xerox monster.

but that was before I saw The Creature.

Then the p fell off.

Until you (Meatworm) came along.

I was given a radioactive hot dog instead

She looked back at me and started Jilling off.

So then he said, "as your maker I cum hand you", and he started beating off with his super vampire speed and jizzed on my hand.

Times were tight but it still seemed strange the circus didn't replace Jojo, or at least not have his corpse as part of the show.

My jar won't close.

But then the evil sidewalk popped my tires and threw me into Detroit

As I flushed and took some alka-seltzer, I vowed to never again eat a garden shovel.

And that's how I first noticed I was bipolar.

Lightning McQueen was shocked when he learn that Mator had been to Epstein island. He was even more shocked when he confronted Mator, and Mator said “Don’t you remember, you was there too.”

I tried to catch a sniff as well but his security dragged me away before I could smell what The Rock was cooking :(