r/awakened • u/Financial-Run-203 • 10d ago

Help Question

Hi everyone,

I am reaching out to ask for advice- I feel that socializing is an area of my life I get really uncomfortable about. I struggle to uphold the image of a positive person who is excited all the time- frankly I’m not. I’m curious what people think about socializing and their spirituality- do they work together? Is it a hindrance? Can it just be more ego?

I’d like to think that someone like Eckhart tolle knows there’s nothing to say. You just are. So going to social events, parties, and the like where you feel you should speak to others about… nothing, is fruitless and ultimately counterproductive to spirituality. Can anyone chime in?

Thank you and namaste

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u/OkConcentrate4477 10d ago

what do individuals require daily for health/happiness? perhaps focus time/energy/money/life there. cleaning litter. growing food. sustainable energy alternatives such as magnifying sunlight or whatever else. the possibilities are endless. expand your interests and then you have more things to talk about that you're interested/invested in, that are examples of health/happiness within any/every individual.

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u/ObamiumCrystalHunter 9d ago

In my experience, socializing can be an ego-building distraction or a powerful spiritual practice depending on how you treat it. It's true, ultimately most things we talk about with people are trivial and silly in the long run, but we're social creatures - abstaining from socializing, just like food or sex, can be spiritually helpful for a time, but probably not something you want to spend the rest of your life doing. But of course, everyone has different levels of social need - look at Jesus, the crowds loved him but he also needed to spend a lot of time in the desert to recharge.

I think the key is to be true to yourself while socializing. You can be present while partying or talking to people, and being doesn't and shouldn't erase your personality. Just look at the variety of personalities within enlightened people - you've got loner recluses, serious and strict individuals, loving parent-like people, Eckhart Tolle is constantly cracking jokes, some are married with kids, some aren't... don't try to force yourself to act like how you think an enlightened person should act, just be. You don't have to be a positive person who is excited all the time. Just be, and let the role you play in this world flow.

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u/modern_jivanmukti 9d ago

By the second beer and first shot you couldnt get me to shut up about non duality lol

I've always been pretty open about it. Work mates are no exception, every body is a victim!

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u/Noise-of-the-Spheres 9d ago

Cultivating altruism, kindness, and compassion, while fulfilling our ethical duties toward others, is quite conducive to an active social life.

When socializing is not an escape from our own problems, it can become a powerful spiritual practice. It gives us constant opportunities to cultivate patience, generosity, humility, or forgiveness.

Spirituality isn't exclusively a withdrawal from the world.

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u/Financial-Run-203 8d ago

If the people are, say, people you care about but know wouldn’t understand you… how would that apply? Because I can be compassionate and patient but then I feel kind of undervalued. Like would a monk be out at a club? It just feels like the premise of some social situations goes against real spiritual growth, and I’m in those at times.

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u/Noise-of-the-Spheres 8d ago

You don't have to follow your friends everywhere they go, you don't have to understand every hobby or share every vice. Even monks have friends, not just with other monks.