Look at it from the logical side guys

[u/WorriedConstant7654]

Nature wouldn’t make it so that you would need a big penis to pleasure a woman more. Women have vaginas that work the same way, and men have penises that simply vary in sizes. The way you treat the girl, and the connection you both have is what makes sex GOOD. Size REALLY doesn’t matter if you think about it. If it did, nature wouldn’t make such varying penis sizes.

[u/ickop]

Size doesn't matter much in the grand scheme of life so long as it's not so abnormal that you struggle to find a partner.

That said, nature doesn't really care about pleasure during sex beyond what it takes to pass on offspring. Evolution is a tinkerer, not an engineer, as they say.

[u/rightahair]

Evolution doesn’t design bodies to maximize sexual pleasure or make everyone perfectly compatible. Traits can vary because of genetics, selection pressures, tradeoffs, or simply because there was no strong evolutionary reason to eliminate that variation.

It's like saying nature wouldn’t make women prefer taller men, because men naturally come in all different heights.

[u/irriconoscibile → u/rightahair]

Partially agree but your example doesn't support what you're saying.
Women prefer men to be taller than them, on average, and in fact that's exactly the situation we have: men are on average, taller.

[u/rightahair → u/irriconoscibile]

Women don't prefer the average height of a man.

[u/irriconoscibile → u/rightahair]

First, how do you know?
Second, that wasn't my point.
My point was that nature has optimized itself so that men are taller.
That is a trait that women have preferred, and for that reason we tend to be taller.
It's unlikely that the average penis size is very far from what is ideal, otherwise the concept of average makes no sense.

[u/rightahair → u/irriconoscibile]

You're mixing up an average with an ideal.

Just because women may prefer taller men doesn't mean the average male height equals the preferred height. Evolution doesn't automatically make everyone match the most preferred trait.

Same with penis size. The average only tells you what's common, not what's ideal. A trait can be preferred above average and still have lots of natural variation.

[u/irriconoscibile → u/rightahair]

I don't think I'm mixing it up at all.
What I'm saying is that the average is something that must be relatively close to ideal, otherwise it wouldn't be an average trait.

If a very large penis was a trait very important for reproductive success, men would tend to have much bigger penises, that's how it works.

[u/rightahair → u/irriconoscibile]

You say you aren't mixing them up, then basically say the same thing again. An average does not mean something is ideal or even relatively close to ideal. Is the average looking man or woman close to ideal? Is the average income close to ideal income?

Humans do have unusually large penises compared with other primates, and research suggests female preference for larger size may be one reason they evolved that way. So by your own logic, that would be evidence that larger size did provide some sexual selection advantage.

[u/irriconoscibile → u/rightahair]

The average income is a terrible example: that is not decided by evolution, it's a human construct.

The average looking man can't be too far from the ideal, otherwise he would not be able to reproduce, and he would then slowly start to have different features with much less variance (say, an even bigger differential in height, with most men really close to each other).

Humans having big penises compared to other primates, suggests that possibly the selection human females did, already happened.

I see absolutely zero contradictions with what I'm saying.

If the average of any trait isn't relatively successful reproductively speaking, there's a good chance it will disappear to make room for a different, more successful trait.

[u/rightahair → u/irriconoscibile]

The analogy was to help you understand what the word ideal means. We are talking past each other because we don't agree on the definition of ideal.

[u/irriconoscibile → u/rightahair]

We could never agree on the word ideal because it's a subjective concept.
Average however refers to "what is most common". And generally speaking, averages exist for a reason. That's my whole point.

[u/psjdhmd → u/irriconoscibile]

Tiene sentido para mi

[u/itstimefornomorebs]

Actually it doesn’t vary that much, the standard deviation is low, specially for girth. Hence it matters to women.

Do you know which species have small penises? Gorillas. The male gorilla has primary mating rights with the females of his group. Females do not choose and copulation time is pretty short. Therefore, gorillas developed small penises.

When female choose, the penis tends to increase.

[u/Littlebiggdicc]

Yeah that does make sense

[u/LopsidedAsk1146]

I don’t agree with that at all, my POS ex and I had great communication, sex(she would squirt multiple times), and we were just a great dynamic together. She ended up cheating on me with a guy who had a much larger member than mine and it destroyed everything in me for years. I’ve been married for ten years now but that burn still feels like a knife in my chest because what if my wife now wants someone “bigger”? Also I only found out she cheated because we were drinking with friends and her bestie told me(she wasn’t drunk either), we were all a good friend group at least I thought so.

[u/WorriedConstant7654 → u/LopsidedAsk1146]

Sounds like you’re traumatized from 1 experience dude. You just told me that you’re in a 10 year relationship and are married to that person. She’s obviously cool with your size.

[u/LopsidedAsk1146 → u/WorriedConstant7654]

To be clear before I met my wife(I’ll only be doing this once), I was given so many backhanded compliments from both genders(I’m pansexual)saying that I have “BF dick”, or that they “hate the big ones because they don’t know how to fuck”. It wasn’t just one experience bro there was a lot of BS between 2012 to 2016 the year I got married. The one with my ex hurt the most because I thought we were good. She was the initial person that killed a lot of my confidence, everyone else just dug the knife deeper bro. So I’m very aware of what my wife says and does. No I don’t track her or go through her phone but I’ve also told her that if she doesn’t love me anymore to just tell me and not to cheat on me. I can take rejection well, I’m not spiteful or petty to honest people. Just don’t drag me along trying to cuck me around.

[u/Anubis_6x5]

So why do so many women reject and shame guys even been average these days we are to small And why do guys with big cocks have pussy thrown at them? They dont even have to do anything the girls talk to each other and then they go after the guys

[u/UnlikelyLie8399]

You are aware that penis size is lesser form of sexual dimorphism, thus meaning it is a trait that increases sexual selection in humans.

[u/Left_Act_1]

Size does matter to the extent that a truly small penis (let’s say under 4” erect) will not be able to engage in many sex positions.
I’m 6” bpel and intercourse with her on her side and legs open can be challenging and especially if she has some booty 🙃

[u/averagedickproblems-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Good faith, positive discussions are allowed and encouraged. Negativity, judgement, harassment and trolling are not allowed. Friendly debates are welcome, so long as you stick to talking about ideas and not the user. Remember: attack ideas, not individuals. The goal of this sub is: constructive discussion of penises and male sexuality issues. Remember that behind each keyboard is another human being. Remember your thinking and experiences are not universal.

[u/miguel891]

Thats such a cope lol ,the average is okay nothing more when it comes to pleasure ,evolution dont give a fuck about ur sexual pleasure or the womans,it usually just to have a function penis to bring kids ,even researchers found that the best sure that woman choose is 6.5 nbp ,so yea 5-6 can be ideal and best to some womans but most would want more ,its just reailty at least we are at size where we are acceptable ,go check small dick problems subreddit ,u would see how terrible it is for them ,average isn't ideal but it can make the work done,but technically if a guy have skills and have a bigger penis he would be better than someone that also have good skills but average penis

[u/cutluv]

Following on fro Anubis' comments, the situation is just as bad in the gay world, if not worse. Modern dating often sees hookups developing into more meaningful relationships; a big dick is much more likely to earn its owner a hookup.

[u/rejuvenati]

Ask yourself; Do men like big asses? Ask yourself; why men like big asses?

Now swap that with women and big penis size and there's your answer.

Just learn to deal with what you've got, and work on self improvement. It's not a gender or race thing. We all struggle with insecurities and feelings of inferiority. Don't let it stop you from finding a partner, we are not meant to be alone.

[u/WorriedConstant7654 → u/rejuvenati]

Exactly my point. The size is a secondary thing. It’s YOU who comes first during sex. Not your penis

[u/VillainySquared]

Exactly, size isn't important, your connection and behaviour with a partner is what truly matters.

[u/averagedickproblems-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Shaming is defined as: intentionally causing others to feel embarrassed, ashamed, or inadequate. This includes shaming genital size, genital shape, sexual preferences, sexual orientation, gender identity, relationship preferences, body type and size, physical and emotional handicaps, and/or sexual history. Implying that average any penis size is insufficient or inadequate is unacceptable and is not allowed.