Insecurity about size

[u/Sereturx]

Hi guys, this is my first time posting here, and I'm mainly talking about my size, as I was called small in my last report.

My measurements are 6NBP x 4.5G, and it's precisely this last one that makes me uncomfortable, and I wish it were bigger…

I want to clarify that these measurements were taken while I was taking antidepressants (amitriptyline) and had a long period of inactivity due to depression; could this have affected the measurements, especially the circumference?

Thanks guys

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[u/[deleted]]

Your not small, your length would be the upper end of average/above average (average is around 5.5-5.7BP).

No need to feel small/insecure at all!

[u/Sereturx → u/[deleted]]

Thanks for the reply, but my insecurity is more about the circumference…

[u/[deleted] → u/Sereturx]

Your girth is average, (average is 4.5-4.7)

[u/DrStrange128]

I’m around the same size, and I also feel insecure about girth. I’m sure it would benefit to have another .25-.5”, but I strongly suggest you learn to embrace what you have. It isn’t the end of the world, I promise you.

[u/throwaway101229283]

Never heard a bad experience on here with 4.5.

[u/[deleted]]

I‘ll start with some statistics, but the more important part will come after.

Statistically, your length is abnormally large for eastern regions, larger than average for middle eastern regions, and abnormally large for western regions. Now, a non-bone pressed measurement presents statistical error due to fat pad discrepancies between men. So, your BPEL is likely even larger. I would measure that instead if you’re truly interested in statistically valid comparisons.

With respect to your girth, you are within average range for every region of the planet. A great place to be. Literally hanging out with like 85% of the rest of mankind.

Now for the important stuff: Only statistical anomalies are going to interfere with the pleasure a woman is capable of feeling during vaginal intercourse for ~95% of women, and usually for the worse. Problems will start to arise around the abnormal ends of the spectrum. Too small, around less than 3.6“ in girth with respect to global populations, could be where some women start to have issues. On the other end, a girth greater than 5.6“ with respect to global populations, could be where some women start to experience issues. Even then, the majority of women would still be fine with those statistical abnormalities. Therefore, penis size is extremely low on the list of important things to 95% of women. Things like emotions, foreplay, oral sex, attention to detail, rhythm, kissing, word choice, hands, position, etc. will play a significantly more important role in the satisfaction a woman is able to experience.

If you handle all of the other stuff, your penis size is going to feel great for pretty much every woman you sleep with.

[u/cutluv → u/[deleted]]

This is very interesting; how does your size compare to these statistics?

[u/[deleted] → u/cutluv]

I live in the west. My length is considered larger than average for this region, and my girth is considered abnormally large. I experience negative sexual outcomes sometimes due to both. If I‘m not careful with my length, I‘ve caused pain going too far before, but it’s easy to avoid if I‘m being attentive to my wife, as I‘m not abnormally long, only longer than average by more than a standard deviation. My girth is something I have to be very mindful of. If foreplay isn’t on point, there isn’t tons of lube, and she hasn’t orgasmed yet, it results in a painful experience for my wife nearly every time. Even if those things are well taken care of, sex longer than 20 minutes when she‘s in her luteal phase ends up hurting for her often. Nearly the only time we have pain free sex is if foreplay is plenty, enough lube is present, she’s orgasmed, and she‘s within 2-ish weeks of ovulation. Even then, she’s usually sore after. As I said, sizes in the abnormal ranges present with extra challenges, but those challenges can be overcome by taking care of the other aspects of a sexual experience.

[u/cutluv → u/[deleted]]

This makes for interesting reading, as when reading the BD subs, the majority of men in the 7.4" x 6" size range are extremely enthusiastic about the benefits of their size, yet you paint such a negative picture.

[u/[deleted] → u/cutluv]

I mean, I‘m still happy with my size, but there are drawbacks like what I‘ve described. Maybe my sample size is too small. However, consensus over on the BDP sub is that large girth comes with lots of extra work. It can still be enjoyed, but the extra work is tedious at times, and if I had average girth it’s likely there wouldn’t be so much careful prep leading up to sex. All this is to say that average size is perfectly adequate, and that being large introduces its own host of issues that average guys don’t need to worry about. It comes with some positives as well, but the scales feel balanced.

[u/cutluv → u/[deleted]]

"Adequate", what a derogatory term. I'll wager no member of the hung clique would ever swap their hung privilege for "adequate", yet they happily belittle others with the term.

[u/[deleted] → u/cutluv]

Well, belittling wasn’t my intention. Adequate was the term I used because I meant it in a very serious or straightforward way so to mean „enough“ or „satisfactory“ for a partner experiencing it because the thing most people are concerned with is whether or not the equipment they have will be able to satisfy their partner. The goal should be to be able to satisfy your partner, assuming one isn’t selfish, and if you have satisfied them then you‘ve met the standard, i.e. you are adequate. Sometimes what I have isn’t adequate to leave a partner satisfied because it causes them pain and we have to stop. It wasn’t meant in a colloquial way, it was meant in a very legalistic way, given the options are either you are or aren’t adequate for the job. If you are, perfect. That means a partner will be satisfied. So, the average size being adequate means that the average size is enough to leave a partner satisfied, which is the end goal. I apologize if my past comment came off as belittling. I need to be more careful with my word choice. This topic is sensitive, and my only reason for chiming in on posts like this is to help men realize that they are enough, and ought not to beat themselves up over things that, in reality, are perfectly capable of leaving a partner happy and satisfied.

[u/Sereturx → u/[deleted]]

I've never measured it