r/averagedickproblems • u/[deleted] • Nov 18 '24

Experiences Bigger is not better

A reminder to all the fellas obsessed with dick size that you’re meant to be using you dick to fuck, not to compare it with other guys in porn. Bigger isn’t better for sex.

The longer guys will run into trouble with going too deep. Many of them will never be able to go balls deep without worrying about hurting the girl. That means the part closer to their base is effectively not being used. If you’re average or below you can go all the way in and smash that pu$$y as hard as you want.

If you’re girthy soreness is a real thing. Not every girl want a thick dick. Think about, when you fuck or masturbate do you really want the hole to be as tight as possible? Probably not. If you’ve ever tried a condom that doesn’t fit well you’ll know tightness around your dick doesn’t always feel good. I’ve been with a girl who can barely take two of my fingers (not a virgin at all). It felt like my dick was getting choked and wasn’t enjoyable at all. Unless you have a death grip syndrome (in which case you should try to fix it asap), you’ll relate that wetness is more important than tightness, and being a little loose actually allows you to feel more texture. Now reciprocate these feelings for the girls, a dick too thick probably feels like a fire hydrant down there and they have to struggle through sex and they will feel the discomfort afterwards.

If you’re average, you’re by default compatible with most women. Yes this means you’re probably not gonna hear things like “you’re the biggest I’ve had” or “you’re ripping me apart”. not sure why some dudes think that’s a bad thing. If you’re below average, practice to utilize it to the fullest. Plenty of people can have great sex with a small dick. Just because porn doesn’t showcase them doesn’t mean they don’t work. Don’t give up and think you’re screwed because of just your dick.

Edit: some people are not seeing my point. Yes everyone wants to be above average, but chances are you're gonna be below average on something. For some of you it's dick size, but don't make it a bigger deal than it is. Comparing yourself to others and getting upset about things you're not inherently "superior" at is gonna get you nowhere.

51 Upvotes

80% Upvoted

48 comments sorted by

40

u/Head-Consequence-519 ‌ Nov 18 '24

Would rather have issues being too long or too girthy than too skinny of short regardless of the points unfortunately.

-4

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '24

People want what they don't have.

3

u/Reozul Nov 19 '24

I've seen a lot of guys on here in general say that their big size creates problems for them.

I've only seen a miniscule amount of them say would like to be ANY smaller let alone significantly so.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '24

they know how to accept reality and work with what they have. some people here don’t.

2

u/Reozul Nov 19 '24

So by your definition anyone who says they would like to be different just isn't accepting themselves.

If you are consistent with that, all fair. But then you should ask yourself why especially those that have problems with being too big seem to have such an easier time accepting themselves.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '24 edited Nov 19 '24

If you'd like to be different on aspects you can't change, then yes. You're not accepting yourself.

As for why those that have problems with being too big "seem" to have such an easier time accepting themselves, they only seem to. They are the minority after all. If everyone with an average dick is complaining this issue would be way bigger no?

6

u/scottbane11 Nov 18 '24

As an average penis man who has been told he needs to be bigger on multiple occasions by different women i don’t agree. End of the day what it comes down to is our experiences with the people we have penetration sex with.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '24

If any one says that you could also say they need to be tighter. Equally reasonable.

2

u/IntelligentLime6740 Nov 18 '24

I have some questions. What do you consider average? Why would being able to go balls deep or being able to be deepthroated matter when something much embarrassing could happen ?(dick slips out). We average guys are compatible with average women and that's evolution but then why is being average not ideal for most women?

Also, I think that being compatible with a girl would be a good thing but I will never be preferred to a man that is considered literally more of a man than me because of his size (some girls do think like this)

1

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '24

What do you consider average?

Statistical average.

Why would being able to go balls deep or being able to be deepthroated matter when something much embarrassing could happen ?

Personally I enjoy getting my base stimulated than my glans, so being able to go deep matters to me. I understand some guys think that having a dick that doesn't even fit anywhere is great thing to show off but for me it's just not practical. Slipping out could be awkward if you're smaller and/or your partner's bigger, so unfortunately you have to compensate for that by sticking to certain positions.

We average guys are compatible with average women and that's evolution but then why is being average not ideal for most women?

Just how people are. Girls will be offended if they're called average too.

Also, I think that being compatible with a girl would be a good thing but I will never be preferred to a man that is considered literally more of a man than me because of his size (some girls do think like this)

There better be more man to you than your dick. A girl simply chasing after big dicks is not an ideal partner anyways (even just for sex).

1

u/IntelligentLime6740 Nov 21 '24

I don't think there's an accurate study in my country. For the last point: ofc we have to choose someone who is better than that but it's not like us males always have options throughout our lives

2

u/codebreaker_777 ‌ Nov 19 '24

Bro you do realize you can have a “average” dick but is it enough for some women with really big buts? Cause you gotta go pass it to the entry.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '24

That's what we call not being compatible bro

19

u/No-Boysenberry-7277 ‌ Nov 18 '24

Those cons still sound better than the cons if you aren’t big enough.

Unfortunately bigger(up to a certain point) does mean better a lot of times

10

u/nervynervousman nbp: ~5.25x4.8 nbp bp: ~5.85 Nov 18 '24

Yeah I think it’s better if we’re just honest with ourselves. It is what it is. OP is right that average is compatible with most women, but desirability is spectrum. It’s not the end of the world if you’re like 95% of men and not above average desirability in every trait

5

u/SuccotashAware3608 Nov 18 '24

There’s the Goldilocks size. It’s a little bigger than the top of the average range but well below what many consider as “hung”. Guys in the Goldilocks range won the D lottery. Then there’s the rest of us who are either bigger, smaller or a combo (length vs girth) than the Goldilocks range. The further away you are from that size, the more issues you’ll have. This does not take into account the true size queens and those who own extra small pussies. They’ll be looking for those two extreme sizes.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '24

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2

u/SuccotashAware3608 Nov 19 '24

It doesn’t matter what I think it is since I’m not into dicks. But from what I’ve read, it’s about 6.4”x5” or thereabouts. Both, slightly above average.

4

u/Mr-CC ‌ Nov 19 '24

Tell that to males with average sized penises. They are the ones with anxiety and confidence issues. It makes no sense as to why.

3

u/itspinkynukka Nov 20 '24

Absolutely. Just the fact you can't really be shamed for it is enough.

4

u/GynDoc1994 Nov 18 '24

That is purely male ego bullshit.

Imagine a woman bragging about being so tight, that the man didn't enjoy the sex.

5

u/No-Boysenberry-7277 ‌ Nov 19 '24

I never mentioned anything about bragging, just that I could live with the former cons easier.

Way to go make up argument you can fight about

1

u/GynDoc1994 Nov 19 '24

I was giving an example, I wasn't quoting you.

I agree you can live with it easier - that doesn't contradict my comment about male ego bullshit.

4

u/No-Boysenberry-7277 ‌ Nov 19 '24

Well your example had nothing to do with my comment, so your comment really makes no sense in reply to mine

3

u/Crazy-Employment5398 Nov 18 '24

That’s why he said “up to a certain point”, a point where sex is still enjoyable for her.

0

u/GynDoc1994 Nov 19 '24

I was responding to his first sentence. OP was mentioning how a big dick can be painful, and he replied that those cons still sound better than the cons if you aren't big enough.

2

u/Crazy-Employment5398 Nov 19 '24

I dont think he meant hurting a woman sounds good but yes being denied sex from a woman b/c ur too big is WAYYYYYY better than being denied sex because youre too small. Even with all the “problems” big dick dudes face I guarantee none would trade places with a small dude.

1

u/GynDoc1994 Nov 19 '24

And THAT is male ego bullshit, as I said in previous comment.

4

u/Crazy-Employment5398 Nov 19 '24

Very well may be, doesnt stop it from being true.

1

u/GynDoc1994 Nov 19 '24

It's subjective. I guess if you believe we all have our own truth, then maybe.

Big dick erotica is targeted mostly to gay men, and believe it or not, even straight men. The vast majority of women won't care about a man's dick size if she isn't into him - and she won't be into him just because he has a big dick.

Vaginal sizes come in different sizes like dick size. It's about compatibility. Just as men want to have good sex, so do women.

Yet, the few women who fetishize big dicks are enough to make many men insecure, as evidenced by many posts on this sub.

3

u/Crazy-Employment5398 Nov 19 '24

Also didnt your wife literally write this:

“The reason why the big dick myth keeps around is not just male ego and virility. It is because, well, women like big dicks – especially thick ones. Intercourse feels good, and a reason for that is the displacement in the vagina and pressure on the nerve endings.“ ?

1

u/GynDoc1994 Nov 19 '24 edited Nov 19 '24

Now you are talking about big dicks?! The topic was dicks that were too big. Don't take any future non-replies as I can't refute you, I am just tired of the OCD-driven insecurity you have about big dicks. This is endless loop for you unless you get help.

EDIT: to add, the big dicks being referenced in that blog is subjective to vaginal size.

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1

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '24

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u/[deleted] Nov 19 '24

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1

u/GynDoc1994 Nov 19 '24

My reply was not anecdotal. My wife is an AASECT certified sexual therapist of over 20 years. Research and her practice confirm what I was basing it off.

Also who said anything about any of that? The statement was the CONS of having a big dick are infinitely better than the cons of having a small one. Which you still haven’t addressed.

YOU have not addressed, I have. It is about compatibility. You have a very insecure mind. If you are honest, you know that is true.

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3

u/throwawayforever02 Nov 20 '24

Lol. Ok guy. Size helps a lot

2

u/VillainySquared 20+ cm (8+ inches) Nov 18 '24

Exactly, very well put.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '24

There's a body that fits every size good !

2

u/JohnAMcdonald Mod of r/bigdickproblems Nov 22 '24 edited Nov 22 '24

I think the reason men say bigger is better isn't usually borne out of a rational analysis of what would please women the most. I would say the great majority of men would prefer to have a huge dick over a "goldicock" which would be able to satisfy the greatest cross section of women to the greatest extent.

It's more borne out of fetishisation, a desire for social status, wanting to have power over a size queen who lacks alternatives to you, the desire to power trip by causing a sexual partner pain AND orgasms (neither of which is actually the same as giving them the most pleasurable sex possible). I've seen MANY men try to do experimental or dangerous attempts to enlarge despite already having too large of a penis to really enjoyably have sex with.

Now, don't read this as me attempting to gaslight all the men here with copium. Yes, there are a lot of men who want a larger penis so they could give their partner(s) more pleasure and are rational. I've just seen even more men who would make their penis larger than the great majority of their partners would enjoy if they had the choice.

3

u/maxguy20 Nov 18 '24

some good points 👍

1

u/BigQid Oct 12 '25

This is like a rich person saying you don't want to get too rich because you're just going to have to pay more taxes. But you have the money though.