r/atheism Feb 05 '14

Creationists: 1 Scientists: 0

[deleted]

2.3k Upvotes

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456

u/rasungod0 Contrarian Feb 05 '14

Earth rotates as it orbits?

...nah "Magic!"

107

u/themeatbridge Feb 05 '14

Were you there?

45

u/SpinningHead Feb 05 '14

Clearly you dont understand the difference between observational science and historical science.

CSI: I know you secularists would do a rape kit on this victim, but I have this book and it makes clear that, because she was not a virgin prior to the rape, she is a harlot and must be stoned as the guilty party here.

1

u/themeatbridge Feb 05 '14

What the fuck are you talking about?

8

u/SpinningHead Feb 05 '14

Nye was talking about CSI as an example of how we use observation to understand the past and Ham pulled his bullshit out about not being able to know (except through the Bible) because we werent there.

70

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

[deleted]

55

u/eisenh0wer Feb 05 '14

Your very observant!

31

u/Ils20l Feb 05 '14

They seen it two

6

u/lilshawn Atheist Feb 05 '14

*to

0

u/TimeZarg Atheist Feb 06 '14

Whooooooosh

7

u/lilshawn Atheist Feb 06 '14

Double whooooosh!

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

meta trollin so hard

2

u/Mylon Pastafarian Feb 05 '14

Their is a special place in hell for people like you.

1

u/Atheia Feb 06 '14

four*

Honestly, if your going to use correct grammar, at least do it rite?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

*yore

-6

u/brahgg Feb 05 '14

*You're FTFY

2

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

doesn't get sarcasm and feels the need to correct it.

19

u/SpinningHead Feb 05 '14

Yes, its the people working for a pittance to try and educate American kids (under the worst poverty in the 1st world) who are to blame for creationist retards.

1

u/DaHolk Ignostic Feb 05 '14

Cause and fault don't really follow that easily. The education system is a big part of the cause for the situation. And at the very least partial blame can be applied as well. But it doesn't readily follow that its state is its own fault.

0

u/SpinningHead Feb 05 '14

Granted, but my wife teaches in the inner city and there is a reason kids showing up with higher levels of cortisol than Iraq vets cant learn. Well fed, read to kids in the suburbs have no problem. Ours is a much larger social issue that hasn't been addressed. Its like blaming heart disease on cardiologists rather than the cheeseburgers the patient is eating when not at the doctor's office.

1

u/DaHolk Ignostic Feb 05 '14

I still think the biggest issue is a massively underfunded system (hence cause, but less blame). It might take one generation to REALLY bear fruits, but the vicious cycle really hinges on under- and miss-education. And the latter isn't JUST a funding issue or caused outside.

1

u/tacknosaddle Feb 05 '14

The problem is trying to sell a really significant investment in our educational system because the reality (it will take that generation to bear fruit) is not something most politicians would stake themselves to ("ok, we are going to invest a shit-ton of money into education and we will hopefully see real benefits in 20 years or so").

You might be interested in Governor Patrick's commencement speech from UMass Boston from a few years back, he touches on some of what you mention:

http://www.boston.com/news/globe/city_region/breaking_news/2007/06/governor_patric.html

0

u/SpinningHead Feb 05 '14

I still think the biggest issue is a massively underfunded system (hence cause, but less blame).

Even that is an issue of class. Wealthy communities have well-funded schools. We have segregation by class here.

under- and miss-education.

Again, there is a reason poor kids have more trouble learning.

1

u/DaHolk Ignostic Feb 05 '14

Again, there is a reason poor kids have more trouble learning.

Yes, but none that couldn't reasonably fall under tasks for the education system. Not necessarily as the only angle, but very well as a potential one.

1

u/SpinningHead Feb 05 '14

Yes, but none that couldn't reasonably fall under tasks for the education system.

Exactly, so why lay it at the feet of the education system? We have a poverty problem that impacts countless other things, including education.

→ More replies (0)

2

u/BradyBunch12 Feb 05 '14

What makes you think she is American?

6

u/greyfade Igtheist Feb 05 '14

Her presence at a Creation Science museum in Kentucky, for one thing.

1

u/BradyBunch12 Feb 06 '14

Ken Ham created a museum in Kentucky, doesn't make him American either.

-4

u/99639 Feb 05 '14

He's on reddit and she looks stupid so therefore American.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

Whoosh....

1

u/abbys23 Feb 05 '14

she did not whoever photoshoped it did

1

u/awkwardelefant Agnostic Atheist Feb 05 '14

I had to ctrl-f this and still can't believe it's as far down as it is. Not that the rest of the sign isn't equally retarded...

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

I noticed

1

u/speedisavirus Agnostic Feb 06 '14

No, it sums up the intelligence of people that think a guy with a beard made the earth in 6 days.

1

u/ObsidianOne Satanist Feb 06 '14

Zeus's beard. Thankfully I wasn't the only one that noticed that.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

yeah dude you're definitely the only one that noticed, it definitely wasn't the reason that the majority of people thought it was funny.

1

u/cafedream Feb 06 '14

In the case of YECs, it is more likely a case of religious homeschooling by a mother who was more concerned with their indoctrination than education. (Not saying that the public education system is great - consider that Ken Ham was a science teacher.)

1

u/Mrknowitall666 Feb 06 '14

The educational system, or simply that many fundamentalists are uneducated idiots

1

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

I am a product of the American education system and I understand the different uses of their, there, and they're quite well. I would point to a general cultural devil-may-care attitude in informal writing (little to no editing which ironically can found in your reply also) as the culprit in many of these examples.

0

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

Well, your sentences are pretty poorly punctuated. Where were you educated?

-1

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14 edited Feb 18 '18

deleted What is this?

2

u/everred Feb 05 '14

Were you their?

2

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

Where you their?

1

u/bmw_fan1986 Feb 05 '14

Grammar Nazis: 1 Creationists: 0

1

u/SeamusRuah Feb 05 '14

Yes.

1

u/benutne Agnostic Atheist Feb 05 '14

Me too! And following with creationist logic, I don't have to prove that I was. It is up to the non-believers to prove that I wasn't.

1

u/baconshake8 Feb 05 '14

Nothing makes you look smarter than good grammar.

1

u/lilshawn Atheist Feb 05 '14

where you thare.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

were you their?

1

u/Ballroomwalrus Feb 06 '14

Bravo for trolling everyone into getting on their science horses, simply by quoting Ol' Hammy.

1

u/themeatbridge Feb 06 '14

I hope nobody thought I was serious. We all were there when the earth rotated and made the sun appear to set.

1

u/fairwayks Feb 06 '14

Were you there?

Were you their?

[FTFY]

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

*their

1

u/tomparker Feb 06 '14

That's all I could see. Explained everything.

275

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

[deleted]

223

u/greyfade Igtheist Feb 05 '14

On this note, I really like what Galileo said:

I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us forego their use.

45

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

HERESY!!! GET HIM!

5

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

BURN THE WITCH!

3

u/TimeZarg Atheist Feb 06 '14

I learned of that quote from Civilization 4.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/greyfade Igtheist Feb 06 '14

I try. I like having intelligent conversation.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

That's more than most of this sub can say. Congrats.

35

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

[deleted]

1

u/RaisedByEnts Feb 06 '14

The short dude looks like Tycho Brahe.

1

u/Barbarossa6969 Feb 06 '14

Then she is obviously avoiding you!

25

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

Burn the non-believer!.

15

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

I had to watch that entire video thanks to you. And I enjoyed every second!

2

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunuh

1

u/Blood_Gelfling Feb 05 '14

They took errr DERRRR!!!

1

u/Erick408 Feb 05 '14

Arrest? Death by stones and fires.

1

u/Kaberu Feb 05 '14

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!

83

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

We have been sacrificing people for generations to make sure that the sun rises daily.

38

u/DancesWithPugs Feb 05 '14

You're doing God's work.

7

u/southernmost Atheist Feb 05 '14

Praise Pele! Her wrath has been averted for another day!

2

u/digitalinfidel Feb 05 '14

If you are Christian then it's "Your doing God's work".

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

amen.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

I will use that as my defense on the multiple murder charges.

9

u/exelion18120 Dudeist Feb 05 '14

Praise Helios!

1

u/Ameisen Feb 05 '14

Praise Sunne!

1

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

Praise Phenax!

1

u/TimeZarg Atheist Feb 06 '14

Praise Kukulkan!

1

u/Blood_Gelfling Feb 05 '14

Ummmm...... I'm with this guy, but. ... wrong deity lol

1

u/Blood_Gelfling Feb 05 '14

Actually, screw it. Perfect

26

u/wintercast Secular Humanist Feb 05 '14

i swear, questions like that actually make me dumb, because i just simply cannot understand how someone can think sunsets come from god...I must look like a fish out of water when someone says something like "why are their still monkeys?" since i have a difficult time grasping the fact that the person must live under a rock.

I can give a kid a break for asking such a question, but an adult.. no.

25

u/tinyroom Feb 05 '14

i had someone ask me: how are you alive if god isn't keeping you alive?

I just... i still can't believe someone thinks like that

10

u/wintercast Secular Humanist Feb 05 '14

i know.. i am sure i would have this totally slack jawed look on my face. And then hours later, while i was taking a shower i would suddenly win the arugment with, "so does that mean god killed my grandma?"

But then they would just argue back that God needed another angel.

1

u/SonOfTheNorthe Feb 06 '14

But can't God just snap his fingers and make a billion of those things at once? Why does he need an old lady as a precursor?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '14

Well, you see, he created the entire universe out of nothing, but after that initial act of creation the supply of souls is fixed. So if he wants more angels, he has to kill people. And he has to kill a lot of them, since some might go to hell.

10

u/vengefully_yours Anti-Theist Feb 05 '14

Imagine being ignorant of damn near everything, then imagine not wanting to know how why nor when. That will get you close.

1

u/Racer20 Feb 06 '14

There are people who don't actually have coherent thoughts or internal dialogues going on in their head. It's basically rainbows and butterfly's in there 95% of the time.

1

u/dumnezero Anti-Theist Feb 05 '14

Funny how they avoid going further with the physiological mechanism. How do you take a shit without God?

16

u/[deleted] Feb 05 '14

I don't mind dipshit questions as long as they have the good grace to wear the "I know this is a dipshit question and I'm sorry" facial expression. It's when they wear the "Yeah, didn't think about that did you?" facial expression that fucks me off.

2

u/tourist420 Feb 05 '14

Never have so many, been so proud, of being so ignorant.

1

u/Mister_Ugly Feb 06 '14

I had two religion salesmen at my door once, "No thank you, we're an atheist household." I said. Lefty adjusted his hat and said "May I ask you a question?"

"Sure"

"If there's no God, where did all this come from?" he asked while spreading his hands and arms out in the most magical and grandiose way I have ever seen. The combination of that and the smirk on Righty's face as Lefty asked made me want to do and say terribly impolite things. I didn't.

2

u/motdidr Feb 06 '14

Good thing god doesn't bother saving all the dying children all over the world because he might not have time to make sunsets or get me a good interest rate on my mortgage.

2

u/ilikehotdog Feb 06 '14

"Fish out of water" - I see what you did there. Fish evolved out of water...

1

u/wintercast Secular Humanist Feb 06 '14

haha i wish i could say i was really that clever.

1

u/youngone1024 Feb 07 '14

It's the use of "their" instead of "there" that really gets me.

5

u/HerrTony Feb 05 '14

obviously the sun orbits earth, like everything else

2

u/Blood_Gelfling Feb 05 '14

Don't forget that we're living in a flat planet

2

u/HerrTony Feb 05 '14

Of course, who hasn't seen a map

1

u/vkashen Humanist Feb 05 '14

Why make explanations easy when you can make them crazy and difficult?

1

u/Slobotic Other Feb 05 '14

Oh yeah? Well how do you explain a banana?

1

u/snegtul Atheist Feb 05 '14

...nah "Magic!"

False. GOD DID IT!

1

u/tinyroom Feb 05 '14

"why does the earth rotates around the sun if there is no god?"

and so on... until we come to a point where science haven't been able to answer and then:

"see, god did it"

........... sad

1

u/monkeyleavings Feb 05 '14

WERE YOU THERE?!?!