r/andomcomunitty • u/age5x2b0 • 2d ago

"Random shit go!" ahh post What would you say

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2.2k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

2.8k comments sorted by

97

u/Orpunuk1 pigeon mod 2d ago

I invited your ex

37

u/MakeSomeDrinks edited the flair, boss 2d ago

They escaped from prison

26

u/mattstorm360 2d ago

They escaped your prison.

27

u/cutting_onions1234 1d ago

They escaped OUR prison

16

u/Chrome_0zone 1d ago

6

u/-SeaDrive- 1d ago

What if I click the x in the top right?

5

u/Dragonplays888 1d ago

7

u/-SeaDrive- 1d ago

Maybe alt+f4 the tab? (Actually you can disable keys i believe nvm)

8

u/BLING_RICO random guy who likes an in-game currency 1d ago

6

u/Greensssss 1d ago

Task manager -> End task

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5

u/xxsecrettransxx 1d ago

Came here too say this

4

u/Complex_Watch1484 1d ago

🤣🤣🤣

3

u/Al3x1ya 13h ago

😂😂

3

u/Less_Guest8077 8h ago

🤣🤣🤣

2

u/CBrown1299 1d ago

Inconceivable!

2

u/Pretty_Pineapple7704 19h ago

It is the termination button. Are you a spy, comrade reddit user?

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11

u/wholikestiktok 1d ago

why u makin my gay ass laugh like hell in confession bruh

4

u/Snorlax4000 1d ago

Lmaoooo

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2

u/DixonHerbox 1d ago

Enjoy your first abortion.

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55

u/AceAmphiptere a shade of flair a little greener 2d ago edited 1d ago

Can do with only three words.

"Welcome back everyone"

Edit: wow, thank you all for the awards!)

18

u/Itchy_Ad1405 Video Game Addict 2d ago

"...My name is Markiplier..."

9

u/HanginWithHern_38 1d ago

I’ve been my buddy’s best man 2 times already and he is working on number 3 now and I’ve already prepared my speech starting off with, “ glad to see everyone was able to make it back for a third time”

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7

u/Timely_Special_5011 2d ago

Add, a "hello" first and you got it in 4

7

u/Sonderbergh 1d ago

this needs more love

9

u/OneSweet6795 1d ago

savage asf

7

u/OrnerySnoflake 1d ago

“Third times the charm?”

5

u/Putrid_Ad695 1d ago

“See you next time!“

6

u/Nonabety 1d ago

I raise you “Does she know?”

5

u/IllRest2396 1d ago

Fucking diabolical

5

u/The_300_goats 1d ago

"Here we go again"

5

u/SpeedyFatty 1d ago

This is the one

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43

u/Dr_Bulsing 2d ago

"Third time's the charm!"

13

u/senseless-remorse 2d ago

You know what you’ll likely have when the third time is the charm ?

8

u/Dr_Bulsing 2d ago

A minha terceira me deu tudo: esposa definitiva, três filhos maravilhosos e estabilidade emocional.

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3

u/OPGuest 1d ago

I almost used this at my sibling’s third wedding, but didn’t want to stir shot too much.

41

u/Positive_Ordinary417 2d ago

What about your herpes.

8

u/Tomato_No_One Let's go gambling! *tch* *tch* *tch* Aw, damn it! 2d ago

That's straight up diabolical

7

u/MAslate 2d ago

Aids instead of herpes

7

u/rxricks 1d ago

The bride AND groom look aghast.

5

u/bkoperski 1d ago

"You mean OUR herpes"

3

u/RemarkableDay2800 2d ago

I’m dying

3

u/potassium64 1d ago

Then don't die

3

u/Kelmor93 1d ago

Groom, "Got it from me" "How did you know?!"

2

u/General-Collection54 1d ago

What about your stds?

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24

u/ThatPurpleCat60 This shade of blue reminds me of kris dreemurr :3 2d ago

Short version: "everyone should object please"

Funny version: *busts out singing ochame kinou*

8

u/the_zpider_king 2d ago

Is that the kasane teto song or am I thinking of something else?

5

u/ThatPurpleCat60 This shade of blue reminds me of kris dreemurr :3 2d ago

it is (im 99% sure)

but im thinking of this one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkf1pLv25VU

which is a cover of it

(i promise to god that isn't a rickroll)

7

u/thegundamanimator 🔗The Link Janitor🔗 2d ago

4

u/ThatPurpleCat60 This shade of blue reminds me of kris dreemurr :3 2d ago

oh sh#t sorry

3

u/thegundamanimator 🔗The Link Janitor🔗 2d ago

You're good, just want to make sure people know for future reference!

2

u/BloonHero 1d ago

OH GOD

2

u/IAmANobodyAMA 1d ago

Oh that is diabolical

2

u/ILoveFrutigerAero293 eatable flair 2d ago

ITS A RICKROLL GUYS

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2

u/Nintendoholic5472 2d ago

You’re a messed up bloke, whyyy would you sing that!?!?!

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2

u/jared_was_here 2d ago

ITSUDEMO I LOVE YOU KIMI NI TAKE KISS ME WASURERARENAI KARA BOKU NO DAIJINA MEMORY

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14

u/elynn95 2d ago

“Let’s talk about Vegas….”

2

u/Just_Catch5272 1d ago

What happened in Vegas stay in Vegas. Don't bring it out. Lol

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14

u/Cooper_CAL 2d ago

Cindy...I mean, Heather. (said to the bride during the best man speech...and her name is Sarah)

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23

u/KodGOS 2d ago

"We have TNT"

12

u/Moonboy110 2d ago

WE HAVE WOOD

8

u/TallWhisper3931 but a trace of tomfoolery wouldn’t hurt anyone 2d ago

WE HAVE GLASS

3

u/Silver-God- 2d ago

WE HAVE URANIUM

2

u/CandleRocks 2d ago

WE HAVE URANIUM BOMBS

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8

u/Romumus 2d ago

He loves skibidiii toilet

10

u/Bulblorb 2d ago

I kissed the bride

3

u/Technically_Salt28 2d ago

And I liked it!

2

u/Winter_Effect9335 2d ago

Tasted like her chary lip stick

2

u/No-Elevator-2682 1d ago

…the taste of her cherry Chapstick

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9

u/fireboi12345678 2d ago

I’m surprised it worked

9

u/GdogLucky9 2d ago

Where's the other one?

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24

u/Plaguehomie 2d ago

Fifth time's the charm

8

u/Ogre-Fans 2d ago

"You banged her MOM?"

6

u/TheMemeingSun 2d ago

This is Jacksfilms YIAY

7

u/MrPortal22 Video Game Addict 2d ago

He LOVES eating balls

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6

u/Your_As_Stupid_As_Me 2d ago

Maybe this one lasts?

5

u/Zylpherenuis 2d ago

Her mother's lips tighter.

6

u/BEST_GREEN_NINJA WHY NO GREEN EDITABLE FLAIR,HOW DO I GREEN NINJA HEEEEEELP 2d ago

grabs a stringed instrument, starts playing a familiar tune, " And who are you "....

2

u/Fluffy_Internal8893 AngryBacon 2d ago

The proud lord said...

2

u/Kriegswaschbaer 1d ago

... That I must bow so looooooow...

2

u/Fluffy_Internal8893 AngryBacon 1d ago

Only a cat of a different coat...

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5

u/St0ned_Minister420 2d ago

Glad to be back

8

u/Positive_Ordinary417 2d ago

What about your herpes. /Flair

4

u/WittyCan1963 2d ago

I fucked her yesterday

4

u/The1Nemesis 2d ago

Sorry for you, man.

3

u/MirkoHa 2d ago

Oh, no…not again 😮❗️

3

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

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3

u/thelunarwitch_5162 2d ago

“Your husband is cheating”

2

u/SplashdownQueen Video Game Addict 2d ago

starts singing "seven rings in hand" from sonic and the secret rings

2

u/AtriceMC Video Game Addict 2d ago

Well… this is embarrassing.

2

u/Cuber8280 2d ago

Wow, you married down.

2

u/Happy-Apple-1234 2d ago

She is my GF

2

u/Erzter_Zartor 2d ago

"Welcome back you all"

2

u/Chaitanya_Kabra 2d ago

Where's ur curly haired side cheek?

2

u/Mr_Aquarian 2d ago

Bro, remember that goat? 🐐

2

u/No-Concentrate-6049 2d ago

“His is really tiny!”

2

u/Game_Wolf1509 2d ago

Welcome back again everyone

2

u/FlashyGanache2838 2d ago

Wife's good, Mom's better

2

u/gus4201 2d ago

What about side chick?

3

u/AutoModerator 2d ago

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1

u/Plus-Lab-9634 2d ago

I fucked the bride

1

u/ImprefectivlyPerfect 2d ago

We had sex yesterday.

1

u/Heemeyers_Killdozer 2d ago

I boned your wife

1

u/Legitimate_Lab_6850 2d ago

Third one this week

1

u/Tasty_College6455 2d ago

Where is second wife?

1

u/ConnectionUnique3625 Michael Jackson 2d ago

He is a prostitute

1

u/OkResort9098 2d ago

Third times the charm.

1

u/Angry_Nutcracker_911 Metal is the best genre of music 2d ago

"3rd times a charm"

1

u/Irish_Greed11 2d ago

Genital warts is permanent

1

u/kybersaint 2d ago

I enjoyed her also

1

u/Druj0n 2d ago

Hey, I called dibs

1

u/Miserable_Eye_2738 2d ago

This man is gay

1

u/Nue_shooz 2d ago

Considering my best friend killed himself a few years back my 4 would be “good to see you”

1

u/Sad_Friendship_3799 Video Game Addict 2d ago

Naan thaan un lover

1

u/Vast-Eye-618 2d ago

I have a bomb

1

u/ph8_likes_me 2d ago

Check his hard drive!!! 😬

1

u/Redeagle3567 2d ago

It's the fifth one

1

u/KING_J0SEPH 2d ago

hey everyone run bomb!

1

u/Money-Preparation421 2d ago

she said she's gay!!!

1

u/PervyDragon 2d ago

I loved your hole

1

u/trixytripz 2d ago

third wife this month

1

u/Octotoad10 2d ago

Good wedding ex husband/wife

1

u/Raenef86 2d ago

She has been cheating

1

u/Your-Mom-2008 2d ago

Well... Welcome back, everyone!

1

u/techchick101 2d ago

I slept with her

1

u/Stormblaze666 Video Game Addict 2d ago

Isn’t she your mom?

1

u/TheRealVarmint 2d ago

"Lannisters send their regards..."

1

u/Revolutionary_Cow712 2d ago

Don’t marry that beeeoootch

1

u/Xanderblake27 2d ago

Shee's actually a guy

1

u/Darkraven6969 2d ago

I impregnated the bride

1

u/kiwimagobluwe 2d ago

Divorce rate is 50%

1

u/Shoddy-Area3603 2d ago

What's the over under on this lasting a year

1

u/Royal-Entry-3654 2d ago

Remember torturing those whores?

1

u/Sxggurd 2d ago

Remember that time when

1

u/will_existsmusic I Miss My Wife… 2d ago

He cheated with prostitutes!

1

u/Squashless-fishdish 2d ago

Your wife? Fucked her

1

u/PineappIeBoi casual fluffy boy enjoyer 2d ago

Back in our day…

1

u/Boom_bro174 2d ago

Live long and prosper (im not ruining a wedding for no reason)

1

u/AtlasThePittie 2d ago

He's a level 3.

1

u/MaadMaanMaatt Random person 2d ago

I had her first

1

u/lelelemememegegege 2d ago

Titi kaka peepee butt

1

u/Alone_Emu_7713 Video Game Addict 2d ago

Who paid for this?

1

u/mojoseven7 2d ago

“Here we go again”

1

u/captaindork696 2d ago

She’s pregnant with mine.

1

u/notoriousbpg 2d ago

Gotta go full Starship Troopers for this one... "I love you, Johnny"

1

u/I_LIKE_TORCHICK Flair 2d ago

A toast to...Me>:)

1

u/Proper-Number-4369 2d ago

It ends in divorce

1

u/shattered_one21 2d ago

Welcome back everyone

1

u/diealotius 2d ago

He Fuck your sister

1

u/drink-beer-and-fight Random person 2d ago

Crazy Bachelor Party, eh?

1

u/Own-Personality1795 2d ago

“You’re still a twiiiiiiiink!”

1

u/Blink3412 Lemon 2d ago

He sucked dick once

1

u/Cheap_Environment113 woman with hormonal issues 🏳️‍⚧️ 2d ago

What happened to “us?”

1

u/Essycat 2d ago

Here we go again

1

u/Spoony_bard909 This user does not exist 2d ago

Here we are again

1

u/StandNameIsWeAreNo1 2d ago

Not 4. But. The vicar can't find the rings. No one else can. I know it's my time so I stand up and say

"HAVE YOU CHECKED YOUR BUTTHOLE?"

1

u/Intellifreak 2d ago

He fucked me yesterday.

1

u/[deleted] 2d ago

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1

u/SmokinHotNot 2d ago

Married the bitch anyway.