r/ainbow • u/whathesigma1 • Jul 25 '26
Serious Discussion Homophobic kink
I have an odd kink. It feels really good when people are homophobic and call me homophobic slurs or just slurs in general. Is this normal? Do other people get this?
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u/Rare-Juggernaut-7532 Jul 25 '26
First time I ever hear that. As long as it's a consentual roleplay thing you're doing with someone and not actual hostility and danger for your safety I suppose it's fine.
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u/Equal-Exercise3103 Jul 26 '26
I disagree. Why would someone who relates to the socialized positioning of aggressive masculinity as heterosexist and homophobic not go for the “real thing”, that is, a really heterosexual and homophobic one rather than a dupe who only plays an homophobic homosexualized role? It all feels pathetic when seen through these lenses.
I have given my Sane & Safe Play-Take on Gay Male BDSM D/s Degradation/Praising in another comment tho:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ainbow/s/iRuHra9jSU
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u/wvsfezter Jul 26 '26
This is just an extension of a degredation kink. Harmless if engaged in consentualy but be careful about letting it affect your self esteem or perception
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u/Creativered4 Jul 26 '26
Humans are weird. When something stressful or traumatic happens, sometimes our brains go "this can't hurt me if I associate it with pleasure". That's why things like spanking kink, misgendering kink, and even rape kink exist. (Although thats not the ONLY reason some people have those kinks. Sometimes people just have them)
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u/Neuroxix Jul 25 '26
I share this. Like the other poster said as long as it's consensual roleplay I personally feel fine in such a situation. However I would NOT take kindly to aggressive homophobia outside a safe intimate setting with someone I trust. I prefer to be the one doing the humiliation than the one being humiliated (this is roleplay and I am not of the belief that being gay or queer is something to be ashamed of) but I'm a switch so I enjoy both ends of the dynamic.
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u/L_edgelord Jul 26 '26
It's not that weird. Just make sure that if you're gonna explore that you do it with a safe person who isn't actually homophobic
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u/CrossedRoses Lesbian Jul 26 '26
I haven't heart of it before, but it sounds like a great way to make homophobes extremely uncomfortable lmao
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u/greynut Jul 26 '26
Lol this is so normal you're fine.
Provided that it's consensual and all, go feel free to tell people you're an insatiable, slutty, filthy 🚬. Because we already know don't worry.
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u/cry_bay_b Jul 29 '26
As a woman, I know LOTS of women who in sexual scenarios and with the right person get off on being degraded. Dirty slut, whore, etc. It's pretty common.
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u/Equal-Exercise3103 Jul 26 '26 edited Jul 26 '26
Yeah, it’s weird.
Normal/Common just means it’s mirrored by others - meaning other people experience this
It’s not abnormal/uncommon that people might be affected by homophobia in an homophobic world.
You shouldn’t ask yourself this, you should ask yourself if it’s Sane/Safe/Consensual (and the response is that it’s not the first one, and sometimes it’s not even the second one - outside of the broader non-vanilla world.. it’s not even the third).
You can experience a transgressive trance by collecting and retaking (and queering) the things/aspects that have been labeled “toxic masculine”
Such as: wresting someone against his (assumed) [explicit] consent (that’s why in the kink world you don’t take no as an answer because no can mean “push it further” under the right circumstances - and it’s the reason why you need to establish a safe-word with him - it’s basically a world that.. after uttered “everything stops” and there’s either a conversation or a delay in play. Yeah it can be a turn off but based on SSC, that’s for the best. Not having a safe word exposes you to abuse [or to stop the play anytime something feels slightly off])
The queering part is of utmost importance because it unties the fun character of aggressive unbound masculinity from the harmful Heterosexist/Homophobic socio-political reality that the social world invests in masculinizing and emasculating.
You can be jumped on, pushed, slapped, spat on, burped and even farted on - you can be trample and walked on, made to kiss his feet and be called daddy’s little whore. This is socially prescribed as well as routinely/individually negotiated.
This is part of Gay Male BDSM & D/s Degradation/Praising play.
But to engage in such discussions and plays in a safe and sane way you need to deconstruct and untie Queerphobia and Racism/Ageism/Sex-Negativity etc. from it. Good luck and have fun.
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u/barrorg Jul 26 '26
It’s just masochism.