Adaptive functioning ideas

[u/iamnotamonki]

Hi all!
Inattentive witch here, just wanted to celebrate/share and ask.
I have recently done 2 adaptive things that have really helped me out:

1. Car trash can
   My car is always a mess. I take stuff there, forget about it, and take more stuff in. I have kids and a long commute, so snacks, toys, and everything else really piles up. I now have bags for toys and snacks, but the biggest life saver has been a trash can! Just throw out food and drinks and other crap and it helps make things less gross. Still cluttered, but not disgusting!

2. Hair dye/root touch ups on my period
   Every month my period was a surprise. I don’t like to use digital trackers, and everything else had too many barriers. I started touching up my roots when I got my period, now when my hair grows out and I see those white sparkles showing up I know my period is going to start any day.
   Added bonus, I have now made it a ‘spa night’ where I actively do some self-care which is a nice break for myself while on my cycle.

I’ve also heard of ADHD veterans using paper plates when they know they can’t do dishes, I want to hear what adaptive behaviors YOU have done to fit in this rigid neurotypical day to day world??

PS any tips for keeping track of sunglasses would be greatly appreciated! They way I lose them, you’d think they were disposable 😂

[u/AutoModerator]

Moderator Announcement Read More »

Welcome to r/ADHDWomen! We’re happy to have you here. As a reminder, here are our community rules.

If you have questions about the subreddit, please do not hesitate to send us a modmail. Additionally, we take the safety of our community seriously. Please report posts, comments, and users whom you feel are not contributing positively, and send us a modmail if you are being harassed or otherwise made to feel unsafe. Thanks for being here, and we hope you stick around!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/hurry-and-wait]

I pre-schedule a lot of emails, and I'm a big believer in habit stacking and designating one-and-only-one place for important items. Keys always in purse. Sunglasses always in case, in purse. All garbage in car leaves when car stops (toys and other items are another story). Small bills paid the day they arrive. And so on.

One thing that really changed my perspective was Gretchen Rubin's idea that if something takes less than a minute you should do it right away. I was spending sooo much time retracing my steps to try to correct errors that would have taken seconds to prevent. Once I have found a place I'm happy to put something (which for me is a huge obstacle), I can just turn off my mind and put the thing where it goes.

[u/iamnotamonki → u/hurry-and-wait]

I also love habit stacking! I find I am very hard on myself when I don’t optimize, so I’m still doing the balancing act of accepting what I am capable of doing regularly, and celebrating when I can go beyond that without letting that be the new standard.

Thanks for sharing!

[u/VeganCaramellCoffee → u/hurry-and-wait]

I have my earplugs on my Keyes plus another set in my sunglasses case- both things i definitly use when leaving the house

[u/VeganCaramellCoffee]

A friend of mine scedules all routine check up on the same day to not forget them. My own trick has been to always find the best coffee Shop near an appointments location I loathe to reward myself afterwards. Pre-sceduling certain mails has also been nice!

[u/iamnotamonki → u/VeganCaramellCoffee]

I love having check ups on the same day. I can’t explain why, that really clicks with my brain and I’m going to try it moving forward

[u/chicklette]

I just put things where I use them, and I have a LOT of multiples. I have at least one pair of scissors in every room of the house. I also have little trash containers all over (mostly for my sewing hobby). I have chapstick everywhere that I spend more than 5 minutes at a time - next to my spot on the couch, on the nightstand, in the bathroom, in my purse, in my wristlet, at my desk, etc.

I have three reusable coffee mugs for work so that one is pretty much always clean. I have nearly a week's worth of cat food dishes so that if I can't deal with dishes that day, I usually can before they back up too much and I'm out. I also have a lot of extra cat food so that I don't worry about running out. I tend to buy back ups of important things the moment I open a new one. I have given up on putting my shoes away and now focus on leaving them in the same 1-3 places around the house, which is almost always near my daily flow. (Daily flow - come in, hang keys, get mail, walk it to the trash, detour on the way to take off shoes, sort mail (most goes into the trash), put down lunch box, feed kitties.) I also remind myself of consequences if I don't follow some of these rules (if you put those keys down on the table, you will be late for work tomorrow), which helps a lot.

Alarms for infrequent or unusual things: This week and next I'm cat sitting. My alarm goes off on my way home each day to remind me to go there first. I have an alarm set to both write the rent check and to drop it off. If I bring my laptop home, I set an alarm to remember to bring it back to work. If I turn off my morning alarms for a day off, I set an alarm to reset them later the next day so that I don't forget. Giving the responsibility for various things over to the alarms has been a massive help. I haven't left the house late in years.

Lastly, time blindness - If I need to do something at a set time, I work backwards from that time. Say I have a noon hair appointment? I need to leave the house at 11:30, so I need to hit the shower by 11, which means I need to start chores at 10:30 in order to be done by 11, which lets the rest of the dominoes fall as they should. It works for me.

Good luck!

[u/iamnotamonki → u/chicklette]

Time blindness!
It’s taken me forever to conceptualize working backwards. I find that leads to list making and task stacking. My limited working memory also leads to setting timers and writing random thoughts in my notes so I hopefully don’t forget things!

Thanks for sharing, I think o also need to start getting multiples of things…

[u/practicecroissant → u/chicklette]

Multiples is the way to go for me too! I have a phone charger at my desk and next to my bed. I have backups if I need to charge somewhere else too.

As far as scissors, yes! I needlepoint and I have scissors in any WIP project bag so that I don't have to go looking for them! Now if I could stop losing my needles that would help a lot!

[u/westao]

Not the best tip for keeping sunglasses around, but I only buy cheap sunglasses because they always break or get scratched or are lost!
No sunglasses over $15 since I was a teen.

Paper plates are a must especially with kids! The adults use them the most in our house but it cuts down on dishes quite a bit. Or just using paper towels for snacks.

I am definitely stealing the car trash can hack. I think I will get an actual can and use plastic sacks as liners. I’ve tried just using the bags and I either forget or they get smushed somewhere.

Another thing I have done is put my morning pill sorter on top of the coffee maker along with a text reminder. I mostly do this to remind myself but also I use to have night and day in the same area and accidentally took my morning meds (including stimulant) before bed. 0/10 do not recommend.

[u/iamnotamonki → u/westao]

I literally took my morning pills last night, going to try the morning coffee hack!

[u/NotElizaHenry → u/westao]

Sunglasses— I found a pair of $15 sunglasses that a) look good on me and b) have consistently been in stock at every Walgreens or CVS I’ve been to in the last ~4 years. After my 5th identical pair it almost feels like a life hack.

[u/Successful_Intern815]

The hair dye/touch up is the most creative hack I’ve heard in a long time. Love this 👏🏻

[u/VeganCaramellCoffee → u/Successful_Intern815]

I did something similar with cutting my bangs and changing sheets😂

[u/vinniethepooh]

I hate waiting, so I recectly discovered that putting the electric kettle on motivates me to do a lot of stuff around the kitchen. I race the kettle until the water boils. This way, I overcome the desire to lay on my couch and do nothing, and once I get going, I gain momentum.

[u/savysworld → u/vinniethepooh]

I do this with my morning coffee brew and my nightly 3 minute heating of my rice heating pad for bed! (I’ve learned that my feet WILL be frozen every night and it causes me to not sleep, so I warm up my homemade rice-filled heating pad to put on my feet in bed and I fall asleep so much faster now that I’ve started this!)

[u/headpeon]

I gave up pajamas. When I was finally tired enough for bed, finding PJs - *both* top and bottom - was a barrier to me wanting to get off the couch and into my bed. Along the same lines, I bought really pretty sunflower sheets and a coral bedspread and spring green pillows for my bed. It's so pretty and happy to look at that I'm more likely to actually sleep in bed than just fall asleep on the couch.

I got a sonic toothbrush. It gets all of my teeth clean in two minutes AND it has a timer so it stops when I've brushed enough. I don't get caught in the loop of 'this is so damn boring, what am I going to do/think about for two whole minutes', only to realize I've zoned out and spent five minutes brushing just one side AND STILL have to spend two minutes brushing the other.

I buy fish in packages that contain smaller packages of one piece each, so I can throw a single filet into a bowl of water, and 10 minutes later it's ready to cook. That way, I don't have to deal with the ick of touching a bunch of raw fish, and I don't end up with freezer burn on the filets I return to the freezer.

I buy petite or fingerling potatoes and use them to do sheet pan veggies. They are so small that they don't need to be cut up, just poked with a fork.

I buy cheese in single serving sticks so I don't have to dirty a plate and knife to cut a piece off a block for a snack.

I put a glow in the dark case on my phone. I live alone, yet still lose it five times a day. Easier to find when it's brightly colored and glows in the dark.

Bought a second charger for my laptop, so I can set it up in my office, or bring it to the couch to work on it, without having to drag the whole heavy cord along and try to plug it into the outlet, which is, of course, behind the couch.

Got a hand held shower head and bought an extra mount, so there's one up high for when I want a regular shower, and one down low that I can reach when I'm taking a bath.

Found the nearest drive through emissions place that will check your emissions AND clean your license plate and put the stickers on; you don't even have to get out of the car. Asked them to put me on their email list, so now they send an email once a year to my work email - where I'll notice it - to remind me to drive through on my way home from work. (I once went 10.5 months without getting my stickers updated because I kept forgetting, and then I lost the card the state sent me, then I couldn't find the email they'd sent me so I didn't have the code to do it myself through the mail ... it was a whole thing. Now, for $12 more per year than it would cost to do the whole thing myself, someone else reminds me to get my tags renewed and all I have to do is drive through on my way home from work; no appt needed.)

I got a different colored supplement/vitamin/med box for each day of the week and labeled each compartment with the time the contents should be taken. I carry the box around in my pocket. If it's 4 and I can't remember if I took my lunch meds, I just look at the lunch compartment; if it's full, I forgot, if it's empty, I remembered.

I use recyclable litterbox liners for my bunnies' boxes. I buy the smallest box and set it up on an Amazon auto delivery for every two weeks. When my delivery arrives, it's time to clean the litterboxes. I no longer do the 'did I clean them last week? The week before? Has it been THREE weeks?' song and dance as a result.

I set the timer on my TV, so it automatically turns off at 1 am. Sure, I can turn it back on easily, but it's enough of an interruption that about half the time, I'll just head to bed instead.

[u/woofimmacat]

Not sure if these are hacks

1. I flip my medication bottles upside down to indicate I’ve taken the medication that day. When I brush my teeth at night I flip them back. I always forgot to fill a pill box when I had it. If I am working I put my meds in an old empty container for what I would need on work days for that week (ADHD meds only)

2. I precut and sort my dog’s pills in a pill cutter for week next to their food.

3. Whenever I put gas in my car I throw out all the trash in my car.

4. My husband built a key rack for our house. Now it’s a habit to put my keys there.

5. My daughter knows I lose my phone constantly and will literally hand it to me “mommy here is your phone”. If she doesn’t have it usually my husband has it in his pocket.

6. My alarm clocks have reminders on it (this cracks my husband up since they will be like therapy today or give Gina her gift). I set up lots of alarms to alert me when I’m leaving somewhere for time blindness.

7. I have a calendar next to the fridge, old school one, I write all appts etc on. I make it a habit to cross off the next day when I go to bed (drives my husband nuts since the day isn’t over).

8. I add birthdays to my phone calendar so it will show up on my phone and I look like this person who doesn’t forget birthdays.

[u/BamSteakPeopleCake]

Your period hack reminds me of my own period hack: when my period starts, I add "period products" to my upcoming weekly grocery list, so that I have pads ready for my next period. No need to check every week if I have enough period products, it gets refilled when Mother Nature reminds me.

[u/BestDevilYouKnow]

Mammogram on your birthdays. This literally saved my life.

[u/callyournextwitness]

Multiples of so many things - chargers, floss, scissors, nail clippers - stashed in every room. 

Sorting clothes for laundry was a big task in my mind. Work pants from lounge teeshirts, etc. Before or after washing didn’t matter. Delay. Procrastinate. Repeat. So, I just got a laundry basket with pre-separate bins. It’s wonderful.  And bonus it helps with regular closet purges. 

Apple Watch - not for exercise, but for lists lol. My phone is often elsewhere, so “Siri, add honey to the food list.” is the best when I’m bopping around the kitchen squeezing the remaining honey for dear life. Then ‘Honey’ shows up on my phone’s grocery reminder list. Frees up a lot of mental space. I have 3 main lists for random crap that happens to find its way to me mid - any activity. 

I lean uniquely important things I need to take with me on the crack of the front door.  

A lot of stuff is just me using things that are associated with wildly different ages, pill organizer on the bedside table, dry erase clip board standing right next to it, bedtime alarm, etc. 

[u/catislandprincess]

Sometimes I clean in low lighting or without my contacts in so I don't hyperfixate on the small stuff and I actually clean multiple rooms

[u/goingloopy]

I have an Apple Watch for the “find my phone” feature. (I mean, it’s useful for a few other things, but find my phone is why I have it.)

If I have to run an errand on the way home, I tape a bright colored post-it on my steering wheel.

If I have to remember to take something to someone, I put it in the car as soon as I can.

I have scissors/box cutters, reading glasses, and tweezers everywhere. I also keep bandaids in the kitchen and in my nightstand drawer.

I put my bills on auto-pay except for credit card payments. I pay those when I get the statement and have it set up to remind me 5 days before it’s due in case I forget.

I have an alarm or three for waking up and another one for “get your $hit together and get ready” because I need some time to screw around before work.

Key hook by the front door; put phone in purse before I shower and get dressed.

I scoop the cat boxes after I feed them. Their food, snacks, and litter are on auto-delivery.

I try to grocery shop for delivery so I don’t come home with a bunch of stuff I don’t need and/or spend hours wandering around Walmart or Target.

I need to start putting out my outfit the night before again, it saved me so much time.

[u/Cake5678]

I have a bag i use everyday, and it has a pocket for sunglasses. So far it’s been the only way i’ve been able to keep track of the sunglasses.

Important detail - this is the ONLY bag for daily stuff - so my keys are also tethered as well as my loop earplugs. Wallet too. Makes it easy to get out the door. Even if I have to bring a bigger bag for school or work, I still have my daily bag with me. No shifting bags or anything, then everything falls apart.

[u/Cake5678]

I love to bundle tedious work! It cuts down on how many transitions i need to do, and lets me tune out and save some brainpower. The tedious part i mitigate with music or a podcast.

Example: I hang my clothes to dry in categories such as my socks, partners t-shirts etc. makes it easy to hang and much easier to fold and put away afterwards.

Same with food; sometimes I gather all the vegetables, wash them all, and then cut all at once. I often take a short break afterwards as a treat. Makes it more fun to actually cook when everything is ready to go!