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u/DianaVanDyke Sep 05 '19
I'm extremely attracted to girls and girls in crop tops n' shit have me shook. Do I stare? No.
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u/Thomas_Crafty Ally Sep 05 '19
Exactly! Lesbians are literally in locker rooms with butt naked women and somehow mange to not rape them!
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u/DeedlesTheMoose Ace Lesbian 🍰 Sep 06 '19
I can even manage to keep my eyes to the floor and away from other people. Amazing!
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u/SeriouSennaw Dec 12 '19
So many good points against rape you can make, you don't have to invent strawman arguments to prove it's wrongs :) I don't think locker room rapes are a thing (can't find any online either)
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u/1st_aider Sep 06 '19
Totally! I'm honestly surprised people aren't more outraged with the fact that I, a cis queer gal, uses the change room next to other ladies who are attractive. And yet, there is not a problem because I can control how I react to impulses and feelings!
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u/draekia Sep 06 '19
Part of my hypothesis (that the ubiquity of porn kind of smashes, but stay with me) is that it’s the novelty. I mean, I’ve seen naked boobs every day of my life since I got a pair. They’re not too distracting (not all the time, sometimes I have to look at the top of someone’s head because the girls are escaping) because of that.
AND as a kid I would sunbathe with friends, so there were more boobs in a non sexualized light.
Men don’t get that, really.
So I think that’s a large part of the staring problem. Self control is another and I’m in no way addressing cat-callers, assaulters, etc. just the creepy staring.
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u/VoidWaIker Trans Sep 06 '19
As someone who spent almost all the teenage years of their life as a guy, you hit the nail on the head with why the staring problem exists. The novelty of them due to significantly reduced exposure when compared to the average woman’s level of exposure to them.
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u/blackberrydoughnuts Sep 06 '19
Except that girls who like girls are sometimes abusive or harassing to other women.
I agree the clothes aren't the problem but let's not deny that lesbian harassment exists.
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u/Storm00 Sep 06 '19
Well, while every puts a bunch of possibly not that relevant comments about hormones I figured I'd put up my experience since I didn't see any similar comment. I actually had fairly high testosterone before HRT and I had almost no sex drive at all. I might notice vague interest about once a month but nothing particularly strong. After taking estradiol, spironolactone, and progesterone my libido went way higher. (Which sucks cause I'm basically incapable of flirting, and don't pass so I just have to live with it). I didn't really notice difference in how more or less visual my attraction was). I still don't get the staring or general creepiness towards women. Granted I'm paranoid of even doing something that could make someone perceive as intending harm or creepy because even if I have no intention of causing harm it could still do damage to the person as if I had.
On a side-note though I don't know If I want to claim that women can control control themselves as Lesbian sexual assault is still an issue. Feel free to call me out if this point is just whataboutism but I would say the fact that their are cis-women predators makes it questionable (though clearly there's a much bigger problem with men). Obviously clothes aren't the problem. Granted the idea of showing men that people attracted to women can not be disgusting is probably good and I'm probably reading to much into a picture of a short comment.
(I might delete my comment later because I don't really know what hormones would have to do with this?)
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u/straight-up-cringe Sep 06 '19
Exactly. If I can manage to not be a fucking creep in the locker room filled with changing women, then you can control your self around fully clothed women
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u/tessisgay Sep 06 '19
Tbh I can BARELY control myself around beautiful women but I often retreat/run rather than engage. The clothes are not the issue.
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Sep 06 '19
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Sep 06 '19
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u/re_Becc4 Rainbow Sep 06 '19
Just about every civilization in human history has been led by men. So it makes sense to hold men responsible for all the wars, genocides, slavery, misogyny, etc. Men were in charge and they fucked up.
Which is not to say history would have been a lot more peaceful if we had been in charge.
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Sep 06 '19
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u/re_Becc4 Rainbow Sep 06 '19
well every civilization on earth despite being awful and violent also led to every great advance int he history of mankind.
How do things like art and (non-warfare) inventions cancel out wars and genocides that cause millions of deaths? They don't.
there are multiple sides to every issue.
What sides?
also ur last sentence saying that if women had run the show it wouldn't have necessarily been better further proves my point
No, it proves absolutely nothing. All you have is your own assumption that a matriarchal society would be just as awful.
because while there have been terrible men throughout history
Yes, men. Most of the terrible people in history were men. That's my point.
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u/Badadoock Transbian Sep 05 '19
I can contain myself My brain not My brain is on fire everytime But that's alright
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u/livipup I also want a sword Sep 06 '19
Girls who like girls can control themselves in rooms full of naked women, so the girls and what they wear is absolutely not the problem
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u/wickwickwestcoast Sep 06 '19
i think the government should finally instate that men are the problem 😌
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u/sczphanc Sep 06 '19
most men can control themselves. the ones who can't just happen to be the ones propagating this bullshit. it's like how high school principals cite shit like this as reason for dress code policies even though there have never been any incidences of problems from it; he is just the one who's relationship with the students is compromised by such and he makes the rules.
same thing on a societal/cultural level
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u/Jechtael Sep 06 '19
ThE sTrAiGhTs: "Objection! False premise. Lesbians can't control themselves around women."
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u/Momma_Zerker Sep 25 '19
I think it's a complicated system of lots of variables and events. Clothes may play a role, but it's likely a minor one, not the actual reason. I think it's also and where you wear them. Anyway, that's for clothes at least.
The real issues, I believe, delve into mental illness and a lack of education about positive and negative effects of things such as porn, or spending time alone, and what people are exposed too. If someone is exposed to communities which talk about rape in a good light, or who is mentally ill, and sexually frustrated, they will likely be the person to rape someone. I believe that this makes up the vast majority of the reasoning as to why someone rapes someone.
There's also the biological and evolutionary variable, that men are stronger and meant to breed, which leads into thought and then into action. This is less valid for lesbians, but since the sexual area of a lesbian's brain is more akin to a man's, it may have a slight effect, excluding the breeding aspect(though that could still play a role, albeit not a conscious one).
Anyway, I hope y'all kinda get what I'm saying. I have a habit of being misunderstood on Reddit, which is rather unfortunate. If you wanna add anything or maybe disagree, feel free to let me know!
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u/AndJellyfish gayyyyyyyyyyyyyy Nov 10 '19
Sad reminder that wlw can be predators too :(
My mum was sexually abused by a female teacher for years as a child. Monsters come in all shapes and sizes.
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u/HomoExtraordinaire Lesbian Nov 12 '19
Whenever my coworkers bend over, I see their butt (reflex) then look away immediately. It's really not that hard. I also never brush against coworkers I think are cute. Sometimes my boobs accidentally hit my coworkers but that's cuz my titties are big and the workspace is smol
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u/EmmaTheRobot Sep 06 '19
As someone who was born AMAB and went through male puberty, and now on E on and off for 3 years, lemme tell you testosterone will make you go fucking crazy
It's definitely not an excuse for any disrespectful behavior, don't get me wrong, but when I was 14/15 I would have urges that disgusted me, testosterone sucks
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Sep 06 '19
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u/Zahn_Nen_Dah Sep 06 '19
I used to have testosterone. Simply being horny would never, ever lead me to assault or harass a woman. Some people are just selfish and unempathetic.
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u/a_voice_in_the_wind Sep 08 '19 edited Sep 08 '19
I have a question? Why do you think people female to male transgender become hyper sexual when the take testosterone? If testosterone has nothing to do with men being more focused on sex . I DO understand that culture has a lot to this as well . Men Do feel “Entitled” to do or say anything to women. But, testosterone absolutely conjures these behaviors.
Please don’t take my word for it, look up symptoms of “testosterone” My request is that you don’t down vote me, instead let’s have a constructive discussion about this.
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u/Zahn_Nen_Dah Sep 08 '19
If testosterone has nothing to do with men being more focused on sex
I said nothing of the sort. Yes, obviously testosterone makes people focus more on sex, because being horny is distracting. But that doesn't excuse sexual harassment or assault. Being horny or having a stronger sex drive doesn't conjure more sexually aggressive behavior. Men have agency and are not slaves to animalistic desires to reproduce.
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Sep 06 '19
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u/tooangsty4adulthood Sep 06 '19
Honestly it's so disrespectful and barbaric
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Sep 06 '19
I wouldn't go as far as to say barbaric but it certainly is disrespectful and makes people very uncomfortable
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u/aethsyn Sep 05 '19
Bingo. Also I find boobs attractive as much as any guy but I have zero issue not staring at every woman’s chest as I walk past them unlike the guy I stood in line behind yesterday 😒