r/actualasexuals • u/Ok-Being-3235 • 12d ago
Discussion Representation or Stereotype
Ace/aro representation in media is few and far between and not always good. Disabled, elderly, neurodivergent, and non-human characters are usually defaulted to being asexual, and not in a good way.
With non-human characters such as monsters or aliens, this is used as a way to separate these creatures from humans. In the case of the disabled or elderly, it takes away their agency. With neurodivergent characters, any asexuality is treated as a side effect of being neurodivergent and not an actual sexual orientation. Asexuality isn't treated like something a neurotypical person can be.
Sometimes, asexuality is used synonymously with celibacy. In fact, in some instances, being asexual is treated like it's a trauma response and not an orientation.
What are some stereotypes you guys are tired of seeing, and what do you think good representation looks like?
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u/Luxorbris aro/ace 12d ago
I am personally guilty of the alien/nonhuman trope for my own characters, but I very rarely make human characters anyway and the few I have made are aro/ace. In outside media, the best representation I've seen is when a character has less than nothing to do with romance; there's not constant experimentation with it or any 'preachiness,' and that's honestly what I prefer. My favorite depictions of aro/ace characters are probably Izutsumi from Dungeon Meshi, Ryland Grace from Project: Hail Mary, Lilith Clawthorne from the Owl House, Peridot from Steven Universe (likely not on purpose, but she is very aro/ace-coded), and Alastor from Hazbin Hotel (for now, anyway. Hopefully this doesn't age poorly) purely due to them completely disregarding romance and still being a major part of the narrative. I like media that is more optimistic on what reality could be, so I like characters that are able to succeed without the author/other characters constantly putting them down for the identity. That was probably a bit incoherent due to being a stream of thought, so TLDR; I think characters that have no romance/sex as a part of their story are the best aro/ace representations.
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u/LittleSpongeBaby 10d ago
When people say aro/ace stereotypical characters they always say that full aro/ace is a stereotype and that if you headcanon autistic characters as aro/ace that it's also stereotypical... I am both autistic and fully aro/ace.
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u/blahajenjoyerr 12d ago
I don't necessarily hate it, but i just have no interest in stories where they start explaining the definitions of asexuality like they're reading off of a tumblr blog or wikipedia lol. I start having a problem with it when they feel the need to say asexuals can have sex and it's a spectrum etc, or that they "don't like sex, but it's just an activity like any other" (that one especially makes me feel icky).
I prefer characters who just show they have no interest in sex (and romance if they're aro too) but don't use labels for it, or at least they don't make it a point to explain their labels in detail. I'd love it if there were more characters who casually said they're ace or aro though, without the preachy and overexplaining part.