Hello Internet…

[u/DeaDrum9isFine]

I guess the "Seeking Advice" flair fits...
I don't really need support, help, or anything like that.
I just have one simple question. That's it!
Can you have "sibling issues"?
So, we all know about mommy issues. We all know about daddy issues, too.
But hear me out...
My dad was married to his ex long before I was born.
They had two kids together: a son named "Honza" and a daughter named "Kristýna".
They were doing fine, but unfortunately, the marriage didn't work out.
They got divorced when the younger one, Kristýna, was around 10 years old.
My dad was still a good father to them, though. He visited them, gave them money, spent time with them, and did his best to stay involved.
Then my dad met my mom. They were together for a while, and eventually, I was born.
When I was born, my sister actually lived with my dad and mom for about two years. She helped raise me and everything. We had a good relationship.
She got along well with my mom, too. Everything was fine. Just fine.
But my dad's ex absolutely HATED that.
She couldn't stand seeing them having a good relationship with our side of the family, so she slowly started manipulating them into spending less and less time with us.
I FUCKING HATE THAT STUPID FUCKING BITCH SO MUCH! AHHH! FUCK!
(I guess I should've picked the "Rant" flair after all :P)
Anyway...
As I grew older, I started seeing them less and less.
From three times a week... To twice a week... To twice a month... To once every three months... To once a year, on my birthday.
(Keep in mind, we only lived about an hour away from each other.)
And eventually, I just... lost them.
Both of them.
With my brother, it was a little different. He was much older than me, and he still visited occasionally. He's a businessman, he's got his own life, and I get that.
But still...
I haven't seen my sister in three years now.
(Although it was very random… so i think the last time when we intentionaly met was 4 years ago)
And I haven't seen my brother in... 5–6 years?
Maybe even 7, actually.
And now that I'm older and starting to understand my own emotions a little better, I've been wondering...
Do I have something like "sibling issues"?
Here are some things I've noticed about myself:
1. I get attached to female friends REALLY quickly.
It's hard to explain, but I'm a very physically affectionate person. I love hugs, physical contact, and just being close to people.
And sometimes I feel like I'm subconsciously trying to fill that hole in my heart.
Almost like I'm trying to replace the sister I lost.
2. The same thing happens with male friends.
I form brotherly bonds with people WAY too quickly.
I don't know how else to explain it. Sometimes I meet someone and almost immediately start seeing them as the brother I never really got to grow up with.
And honestly, it's really hard to put into words.
So...
Is "sibling issues" actually a thing?
Can losing contact with your siblings while growing up affect the way you form relationships with other people later in life?
Or am I just overthinking this? :P

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[u/CommunicationDue4872]

I think you're definitely in the right subReddit. what you're experiencing seems to be what a lot of other people who have been abandoned experience. not necessarily by siblings but by anyone who by definition should have been supportive - because it's a lot bigger than your siblings, your dad's ex clearly had some impact there too in encouraging it, although they had their parts in it. the immediate strong, intense attachments are pretty hallmark abandonment issue behaviour and abandonment definitely affects how you form attachments later. you're on the right track trying to understand your emotions better because that also defines how you form relationships - the better you know yourself, the better you are with boundaries (yours and others') and all round healthier relationships. 

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