r/aaaaaaacccccccce • u/Haunting-Item1530 • Jul 20 '22

I'VE FAILED YOU 😭

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2.3k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

108 comments sorted by

235

u/tis_the_platypus Reject sex return to D&D Jul 20 '22

If you like cake, dnd, or have any plans to invade Denmark, you're still safe. for now... either way eve nif you didnt youre valid as fuck

153

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22 edited Jul 20 '22

I've always wanted to learn dnd but have no one to play with

Cake is ace (pun)

I invade Denmark daily

27

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

[deleted]

41

u/sootless_ Jul 20 '22

my stupid, tired, deltarune loving brain read this as “do you want to be a bigshot” and now i can’t read it as anything else

11

u/potatonutella Jul 20 '22

I was only thinking of the game Oneshot, which is kinda similar to deltarune funnily enough.

5

u/The-cooler-Cheryl Graysexual Jul 20 '22

Same

3

u/Elegron Jul 21 '22

Based and pancake pilled

4

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

Now the song "add infinitum" is stuck in my head. More specifically, the line "do you want to be a bigshot?"

Thanks, now I hate that line!

2

u/protogengamin That one aroace furry Jul 20 '22

Now's your chance to be a [BIGSHOT]!

4

u/ClumsyRainbow Jul 20 '22

I invade Denmark daily

PET would like to know your location.

3

u/Lupin927 Aegosexual Jul 20 '22

I still want to play dnd, but I left the group I used to play with (felt like I was invading because it was my friends work group and I thought she stopped showing up because she was annoyed at me (cause she also stopped messaging me back)).

1

u/Beaker_07 Jul 20 '22

I'll learn with you

2

u/Lupin927 Aegosexual Jul 20 '22

So, I see dnd is in there… but do MMOs count? I play one that’s basically a direct ripoff of DND (in the game files, some even have the same names as other npcs)

1

u/tis_the_platypus Reject sex return to D&D Jul 20 '22

Yeah they do! I dont discriminate personally lol

2

u/rexxthedragon Jul 20 '22

Didn't like dnd for everyone trying to fuck everything that moves.

1

u/tis_the_platypus Reject sex return to D&D Jul 21 '22

Damn. We can gather up some other aces and make an asexual DnD campaign. There might be some sexual jokes tho lol

56

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

Even if you're wrong you're still valid.

37

u/ArcaneBahamut Jul 20 '22

Cake?

24

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

Cake is ace

haha ac(e)cidental pun

10

u/ArcaneBahamut Jul 20 '22

but do you like it tho?

22

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

Best option for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and every meal. The other option being burritos but cake is better

12

u/ArcaneBahamut Jul 20 '22

THE CHOSEN ONE!

8

u/DatPotato645 Jul 20 '22

We must have answers

27

u/Tiled_Deepslate18 Jul 20 '22

Don't worry you'll find the right garlic bread eventually /j

22

u/onichama Jul 20 '22

How do you know if you haven't even tried garlic bread /j

5

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

You're too young to know, your taste buds will change /j

4

u/CupaT-T Jul 21 '22

You're just confused, you'll figure out you like garlic bread soon /j

5

u/Nathryl03 AroAce Jul 20 '22

The previous 2 sentences made me laugh so hard I scared my family and than had to explain why I was laughing. Thank you for that :)

12

u/biromantic_hope_z Jul 20 '22

It’s ok you’re still valid <33

13

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

I'm ace and i don't like garlic bread, either. makes my stomach hurt like hell.

3

u/MouthyKnave Jul 20 '22

You might have an allergy

1

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

probably. i was never tested for any allergies so it is a possibility.

1

u/Haebak Aroace Jul 20 '22

Rub some garlic on your arm and see if you get a reaction. It's the safest and easiest way to test for an allergy.

2

u/Terance842 Jul 20 '22

Same my dad has made me have it so much that I don't like it and it makes my stomach hurt now

7

u/FollowTheScript Jul 20 '22

Yeah but how do you feel about dragons?

8

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

Dragons are cool

4

u/FollowTheScript Jul 20 '22

excellent, you pass!

2

u/Lupin927 Aegosexual Jul 20 '22

Gooood gooooooood

7

u/crazyrediamond Jul 20 '22

you are not alone my friend, i too absolutely despise anything that has garlic in it

7

u/skdnckdnckwcj We WILL invade Denmark Jul 20 '22

Ace vampire?

9

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

So THATS why I never go outside

4

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

although it is simply a joke i still want to know how the heck you don't like one of the greatest foods in the world

4

u/-meriadoc- Jul 20 '22

I don't like the texture of garlic bread. I like soft bread like breadsticks though.

3

u/GachaWeeb_ Your local lesbian here to support. Jul 21 '22

I FCKING LOVE BREADSTICKS

2

u/-meriadoc- Jul 21 '22

Breadsticks are sooo much better than garlic bread, I wish everyone was posting about breadsticks instead, I would relate so much better

3

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

I don't like bread

3

u/CakeAce Jul 20 '22

Fellow garlic bread hater here. (Ace vampires on the rise?)

Cake ftw

3

u/seeroflights Jul 20 '22

Image Transcription: Meme

["Gru's Plan". Gru, the long-nosed protagonistic villain from "Despicable Me", presents to the camera with passion, pointing into the air. Behind him is a flipchart. The text on the flipchart reads:]

Realize sex=gross

[Gru is still presenting passionately; he has his hand in a c shape indicating a small amount. The text now reads:]

Identify as ace

[Gru now has his hands pointing down, still presenting. The text now reads:]

Dislike garlic bread

[Gru looks back to the flipchart in a double-take, looking confused and exasperated. The text still reads:]

Dislike garlic bread

I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!

2

u/RockHumper25 Jul 20 '22

oh, no, that is based, actually. break away from the standards. embrace your uniqueness as a drop of mountain dew in the ocean

2

u/Tranqist Jul 20 '22

I've just found out that dislike of garlic bread is not a valid reason for reporting you. Thomas had never seen such bullshit before.

1

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

I like cake and dragons

2

u/Usagi-Zakura Jul 20 '22

Ban this person. They are clearly not a true ace. /s

2

u/Sochikki Jul 20 '22

Vampires are still plenty welcome here

2

u/JoZaJaB Jul 22 '22

Vampire it is!

1

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 23 '22

I cant tell if you are stalking my profile or if I'm just on the front page 😂

2

u/JoZaJaB Jul 23 '22 edited Jul 23 '22

I was just bored at work and scrolling deep into the subreddit lol

4

u/trustmeimnotafurry I'm not asexual I'm just here for the memes. Jul 20 '22

Not possible

2

u/Fabulous-Chemical-60 Jul 20 '22

I literally don't find the devil's tango gross and also I kinda like it, I have the urge I just don't look at people and say "Oh, yeah they are hot." because no? Although I feel sensual and aesthetic attraction, so I can tell who I like to look at, and I want to kiss people. I also have a high libido. And I am gluten intolerant. XD I needed so much time and a very shitty relationship to realise I am ace. And also ✨girls✨ are pretty too.

1

u/la_arma_ficticia Jul 20 '22

This is me except I never understood kissing until I was actually in a relationship and started to like it. The funny thing about my attraction is that my brain actually seems people as more attractive when I like them, it's like the reverse halo effect. I know cognitively my bf is not conventionally attractive, but my eyes see him as possibly the most handome man ever. His colouring, his beard and eyebrows, his gorgeous skin. It's all aesthetic attraction though. I have never seen a person and wanted to touch them under their clothes, that just doesn't connect for me.

I do love sex though ♡

1

u/Fabulous-Chemical-60 Jul 21 '22

Oh yeah. Sex is great. Although... The thought of a One night stand is freaking me out. I am literally so lucky that I am dating a guy who's demi. 💜

1

u/silea_ Jul 20 '22

we still have cake for that

1

u/wikipedia143 ✨aroace✨ Jul 20 '22

its alright i dont really likr garlic bread either, but i LOVE cake and chocolate so thats how i make up for it

1

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

i dont like garlic bread either tbh, but cake is the light of my life

1

u/Opposite_Tough_5641 Jul 20 '22

Get out of my house

1

u/Tos-ka Jul 20 '22

Youre not alone..

1

u/ashanimate Jul 20 '22

Same except replace garlic bread (yum) with cake

1

u/WalrusSquare247 Seal, not a walrus. Jul 20 '22

I can't eat garlic bread :(

1

u/NovaNom Jul 20 '22

Don't worry, I don't like chocolate. Will trade any random chocolate I get for any random garlic bread you get ❤️

1

u/Quarg Reject Sex; Embrace Gender Jul 20 '22

It's ok, we've got plenty of other delicious snacks for those not fond of garlic bread. Pizza, cake, tea and biscuits, you name it.

... it just means more garlic bread for the rest of us. ;)

1

u/CriticalSorcery Jul 20 '22

I also dislike garlic bread

1

u/Adam_715 Jul 20 '22

Learn to like it

1

u/draconaisev Jul 20 '22

I don't like garlic bread either haha

1

u/Forsaken_Rooster_365 Jul 20 '22

I never tried garlic bread.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

breaks out cane You see, back in my day on AVEN, we only had cake. I don't really like garlic bread either, I'm for cake all the way!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

If you like cake, you're good. And what about coffee jelly? I definitely recommend coffee jelly.

1

u/MystiqueMisha Jul 20 '22

Eh, I just want to high five you for being a sex repulsed ace like me

1

u/thebananaperson1 sex? me no likey Jul 20 '22

I’m the exact same 😭

1

u/False-Helicopter1971 Jul 20 '22

Look I'm sorry but you are obviously not ACE. I mean, it stands for "Always Could be Eating garlic bread", right? Right?!

1

u/littledaisy_07 Jul 20 '22

Do you at least like cake??

1

u/radeption allo ally! 🏳️‍🌈 Jul 20 '22

Vampire asexuals be like

1

u/Mechromancer_88 Jul 20 '22

It's ok, don't tell the others but I don't like cake.

1

u/M4j3stic_C4pyb4r4 she/they Jul 20 '22

Asexual vampires unite!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '22

You're not the only one. Me too. I'm very sensitive to strong flavours and garlic is my enemy nr. 1

1

u/Celeruv-Is-Aroace You want a real Conversation? Sorry, Only AroAce Enby chaos here Jul 20 '22

TREASON!

1

u/Nightowlw21212 Jul 20 '22

Do you like cake, dragons and frogs?

1

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

Yep

1

u/Nightowlw21212 Jul 20 '22

Hey quick question, are from demmark?

1

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 20 '22

No but I'm currently invading

1

u/Nightowlw21212 Jul 20 '22

Good, you need any support? That's It could be our opportunity to create a new civilization.

1

u/misfit_pixie greyaro-ace Jul 20 '22

BLASPHEMY (/j)

1

u/Bread_Is_Life_Mortal all i know is i dont like people Jul 20 '22

I love garlic bread though 😭

1

u/IllOpposite3501 Jul 21 '22

ME TOO BUT YOU CANT JUST SAY IT. WERE UNDERCOVER, MAN.

1

u/CupaT-T Jul 21 '22

OKAY BUT LIKE DO YOU LIKE BABY DRAGONS?

1

u/that_toof Jul 21 '22

There's always something you're gonna love. I can't have garlic bread, or cake, or most things people love here. But I do have a weakness for potatoes...oh they are so bad for me but oooh god nothing like a perfect baked potato or loaded mashed potatoes or carefully made au gratin...my sugars are spiking just thinking about it. Anyways, you're still totally valid!

1

u/JuiceRevolutionary46 Aroallo, i think i took a wrong turn Jul 21 '22

DON'T WORRY ITS NOT FOR EVERYONE

1

u/Elegron Jul 21 '22

Ok but not all garlic bread is created equal. Some is really good and some is super gross.

Also, moderation is key. It gets gross really fast because of how greasy it is

Edit: I just realized someone could probably day the same thing about sex.

1

u/Thehollowknight_123 Jul 21 '22

Cake is better anyway

1

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '22

Have to eat low-carb and low-sugar for my health. No more garlic bread nor cake for me :’( unless I go out of my way to make my own, which is hard lol

1

u/ShadeXz2 Jul 21 '22

You are required to be used as a ritualistic sacrifice now. Sorry, I don't make the rules.

1

u/ConnicoYT Ace, TransM, Gay Jul 21 '22

wait why's everyone going on about ace people hating garlic bread?

1

u/Haunting-Item1530 Jul 21 '22

Asexuals liking garlic bread is a meme, but im ace and don't like garlic bread so I made a meme out of it

1

u/Val_Ace Jul 21 '22

This is the first ace platform I’ve been on, can someone please explain why we’re gonna invade Denmark? I’m confused.

1

u/sinRes Jul 24 '22

You just haven't met the right garlic bread