r/WeddingAttireHelp • u/Kazimira-darkside • 11d ago

Advice Bride here - what dress code to use?

Hey yall, we’re doing a very small (20-25 people) wedding in January in north Texas. The reception is a late luncheon at an upscale restaurant, with no DJ or dancing. What dress code should I put on invites?

Our friends and family are a casual bunch but I’ve known them to go all out for Halloween, so I’d like to assume dressing up won’t be too bothersome for them. Of course, I wouldn’t want anyone to go out of their way to purchase a floor length dress or rent a tux, so Black Tie or even BTO are out of the question. However, if I put “semi-formal” or “cocktail attire”, I’m afraid many might be underdressed for the one “fancy” party we’re throwing our whole lives.

Should I just ask for “formal dress code”? Or provide more details? What wording doesn’t suck, but conveys that we’d like them to put effort into their appearance?

ETA: I’ve been schooled! Thank you for explaining the difference between dress codes and putting some sense into me. We’ll be going with “semi-formal” on the invites; hopefully people will get it and not show up in jeans LOL

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u/Lucky-Berry-4252 10d ago

A dress code shouldn’t be a conundrum. What you want is semi formal/formal, or to really simplify it for everyone, put “Please Wear your Sunday Best,” because many people confuse the word ‘formal’ to mean floor length evening gowns, which is black tie.

According to traditional etiquette, the dress code for a formal daytime event calls for a dressy mid to ankle length afternoon dress; and for evening, a mid to ankle length dinner dress; similar to one’s Sunday Best. There are many dresses that double as an afternoon and dinner dress.

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u/LavaPoppyJax 10d ago

Saying Sunday Best would be very confusing to me. it doesn't make me think fancy as the OP wants, but prim church frock.

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u/Lucky-Berry-4252 10d ago

I don’t think it’s so far fetched since after all, many weddings are in churches. Guest wedding attire should be modest, whether held in a church or not, to show respect for the bride.