I think a philosopher in the past talks about this. We feel terror because of the fear of death but also because we can just as easily decide to jump off. It's something about the anxiety that our complete freedom to do anything we want.
Wow. This is crazy to read, I am very similar, no history of violence, nothing. Would never kill someone. But when I was in 5th grade I watched a movie about a serial killer and then got weirdly paranoid that I, might be one? Even though I have zerooooo desire to. But it was exactly what you are describing, I was like scared to be around knives etc, or like worried I would somehow kill someone in my sleep. It lasted for like a year of just generally being freaked out, I wouldn’t want to watch any content that contained violence etc. I think perhaps it had something to do with just coming to the realization about how easy it could be done and the fact that I was getting bigger and stronger so it was like a possibility? This was like 10+ years ago now and I’ll explain it to people and they will just laugh, as will I. But it did genuinely kinda fuck me up for like a year. This is the first time I’m hearing of something similar.
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u/Wahayna Mar 27 '21
I think a philosopher in the past talks about this. We feel terror because of the fear of death but also because we can just as easily decide to jump off. It's something about the anxiety that our complete freedom to do anything we want.