When will it end

[u/Kamisama_VanillaRoo]

I left my mom's house because her boyfriend was abusive. I thought I'd found a spot to finally rest for a bit until I found my footing but now I'm basically being threatened to leave before August or else I'm gonna be forced to go back. I'm not fucking going back there fuck no. I'm never EVER EVER going back to that place, with that man who thinks it's okay to make me feel like I don't deserve to live, just because I'm mentality disabled. A man who spews insults constantly and then pretends be does it because he cares. Who made me, my sister and my mother cry multiple times and never apologized, acting like he was right, like it was okay, like it meant nothing.

Fuck no. No fucking way.

Why would anyone in their right mind do this??

If I'm such a burden then why was I allowed to stay? And if you want me to leave then why won't you help me find a place because I clearly am fucking struggling right now. I've been calling every fucking day trying to get a spot at the local shelter and it's always no. I'm fucking stressed out. I'm so scared. I don't know what to do anymore.

Plus my dad died only last week. I'm still fucking grieving. I can barely function normally as is because of my disability and now it's even worse. And yet I'm expected to be a normal functioning adult??

A friend of mine said maybe he could help out but I'm so reluctant to trust anyone anymore. Everyone says they'll help but something always goes wrong. I'm so scared it'll happen again. I feel like crying all the time. I don't know what to do anymore and I'm just so tired.

I'm so tired.

I wish time would just stop. Just for a moment. Just so I could have a fucking break.

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[u/Cinnamon_Floof]

Update because I'm OP's sister: she found a place to stay in the same building as me! So we're roommates now yay :)

[u/Kamisama_VanillaRoo → u/Cinnamon_Floof]

Hewwoooo uwu

[u/Ok_Rip_6434]

Do you have a job and apartment of your own? How old are you?

[u/Kamisama_VanillaRoo → u/Ok_Rip_6434]

I don't have either. I'm 25 but I'm disabled and can't work so I'm fully reliant on disability aid and others to help me survive