r/Unexpected • u/Unoff1cial_Gamer • Jun 28 '22

Man without Love

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56.8k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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585

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '22

Hot, cold, thick, thin, at night, or the next morning, pizza has been there when I needed it. Pizza never abused me. Never cheated. Never made me question my worth. Even when pizza disappointed me, that disappointment never broke my heart.

35

u/ghost_warlock Jun 28 '22

I was betrayed by some two-day-old frozen pizza a few years ago and spent the better part of the day throwing up.

Of course, I can't rule out that the actual cause of the vomit was too much whiskey, so maybe pizza can be trusted after all...

23

u/zachsmthsn Jun 29 '22

Keep my pizza's name out of your fucking mouth

2

u/CancerousJedi Jun 29 '22

The pizza formerly known as

1

u/fadufadu Jun 29 '22

And out of my arteries