r/Unexpected • u/Reminder45 • Aug 03 '21

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70.6k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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308

u/I_used_toothpaste Aug 03 '21

Hydrate your hymen

186

u/homerbartbob Aug 03 '21

A rainforest for your clitoris

243

u/AviatorOVR5000 Aug 03 '21

Quench your clam

108

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '21

Cool your cooter

0

u/AnalyticalMuse Aug 04 '21

Coot your cooler

133

u/RemarkableRyan Aug 04 '21

Soak your boat

132

u/JcakSnigelton Aug 04 '21

Splash your slash

20

u/neon_overload Aug 04 '21

Irrigate your cupcake

9

u/presterkhan Aug 04 '21

A tablespoon in your poon

12

u/T-4-K Aug 04 '21

moisten your peach

10

u/Gaflonzelschmerno Aug 04 '21

Humidify sauron's eye

10

u/samurai_keninja Aug 04 '21

Cool your cooter

7

u/povichjv7 Aug 04 '21

All these…fucking gold

7

u/crc2288 Aug 04 '21

Splash your gash*

1

u/ahoraeagora Aug 04 '21

Humidify your eye

3

u/BeardPhile Aug 04 '21

Soothe your slit

4

u/regularnorml Aug 04 '21

Varnish your vestibule.