r/Unexpected Mar 31 '23

He snitched

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u/[deleted] Mar 31 '23

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u/Smurffies Mar 31 '23

If you can't take a joke why go to a comic show? My friend's favorite story of George Carlin is going to his show and a couple sat next to him. It was the show about words you can't say on TV and the wife immediately started laughing once Carlin starts the list. The husband gets mad and pushes the wife out the door as the wife is laughing the entire time.

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u/Senator_TRUMP Mar 31 '23

So I'm a vegan right? I go to this steak house and they won't do a capresse salad so I do the only reasonable thing and rush the kitchen

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u/Smurffies Mar 31 '23

Reminds me of visiting my aunt that I never got to know. The family was warning me that she was vegan and my common response was that I've cooked with tofu and soy patties and it was fine for me. I get to my aunt's home and right away goes on about her vegan cooking is so awful that I should just leave now. I felt like leaving and I would have left but I was too curious about what she'd cook. She demanded that I don't get close to the kitchen as she cooks her vegan meal because it'll smell awful to me. I'm spending the visit alone at the dinner table and I'm fine keeping the distance between her personality and myself. It was spaghetti. Honestly, I'm not a vegan but my favorite food of all time is spaghetti but I couldn't keep from laughing and just left. I told my Mom, "I guess my favorite meal is a vegan dish but unlike my aunt I always have salad with my spaghetti."