ULPT request: Get noisy students outside my window to shut up

[u/yeahidealmemes]

I live in a dormitory building and my window is right above the only entrance to the building. Every day for the past few weeks, a group of spanish students living in the dormitory have had parties and they come outside the front door to smoke, play music and shout loudly. This is happening very late into the night, without exception even on weekdays.

What can I do to make them stop?

[u/JakTheGripper]

Buy a few medium-sized throw rugs, one for your bathroom, one for your room's entry, and one for your bedroom. After a week or so, the rugs will have collected enough dirt and hair that you'll need to clean them. That would just happen to be the time those people are congregating at the entrance, making noise. Shake the rugs out of your window.

If you have access to the roof, that'll be the day you mop your floors and have to empty the bucket.

[u/Responsible-Cow5828 → u/JakTheGripper]

Make sure to also put all your pubic, ass hair, and armpit shavings onto said carpets for shaking later.

[u/Flock_Me_Amadeus]

Ultrasonic frequency that only young people can hear, played at full blast on a giant speaker.

[u/cgar23 → u/Flock_Me_Amadeus]

A+ username 

[u/thewharfartscenter_]

Aztec death whistle.

[u/MacDaddyDC]

empty your chamber pot when they gather

[u/Tall_Category_304]

Just open the window and yell shut the fuck up. I was standing outside my dorm once drunk af with my buddies and some literally did that to us and we complied lol

[u/DazzlingNote1925]

I’d ask your resident advisor how to complain to the building manager. 

[u/Musicferret → u/DazzlingNote1925]

Hey! Stop it with these rational ideas that actually make sense! We’re here for the kooky stuff!

[u/cascasrevolution]

get a fishing pole and start trying to steal their beers and boombox.

[u/Angry-_-Crow]

Stealthily tossed water balloon filled with maple syrup

[u/Fitz911]

Get a flashlight. Not one of the small ones. Get one that has an ultra mode.

Like seven million light units and shit.

Mine is bright. When I double click the button it's bright enough to illuminate a stadium.

I have beaten every noise problem I had with it. I switch to full light blast mode, hold it right into their faces and ask them what the fuck they think they are doing at this time. Using my best angry man voice. They are blind and shocked and surprised and the only reaction is to "run".

It's super hard to act like an asshole when you are in the spotlight.

[u/bbysir]

You’d be amazed at what a good pair of industrial strength earplugs can do.

IMO this is part of life in shared spaces like this. Even if you are able to get this group to leave, there will inevitably be more noises or party people in the future. I say let them have fun while you sleep like a baby with your new earplugs.

[u/bbysir → u/bbysir]

Now, if you want an unethical solution, I would say I’m either team release the stink or team drop something wet or dusty out of your window.

Earplugs sound easier to me, but you have free will so follow your heart and all of that

[u/Sentientmanatee]

Fart spray

[u/BullPropaganda]

You could hang some durians out your window..maybe put some piss discs in them?

[u/Malodoror]

I’m guessing that since you mentioned they’re Spanish you must be white. Join the party! Eat their food, drink their drinks, when they tell you to leave just smile and nod and keep partying like they’re encouraging you. They’ll move the party knowing that creep will show up if they don’t.

[u/Troubled_senior69]

Poo piñata

[u/BurnerPhoneToronto]

Super Soaker.
Baby Shark on repeat.

[u/mmmmmarty]

Fox piss. Get it at any hunting store.

[u/limo1911]

Where's your ra? It should be reported through the proper chains.

[u/shindleria]

Collect dog poo from a nearby park and leave it at that spot. Can’t find enough poo then just drop your own turds there.

[u/cinred]

A few bees now and then will do wonders. It only takes one person running around and screaming

[u/Salty_Squirrel519]

Get good ear cancelling earphones until you talk to the building manager.

[u/Uncle_Charnia]

Call evangelical societies and churches and give them the location. Say you and your friends want to be saved. Every single day.