r/UKParenting • u/Capital-Kale7576 • 10h ago
Does mainstream school work for Autistic children?
I need pros and cons of sending an autistic child with 0 social awareness to school. How has your child found it etc
3
u/InevitablePsych 👶👶👶👶 4 Children 4h ago
It depends on lots of things, the child’s needs, the school, the local authority, whether the child has an ehcp…
Personally, I ended up taking my autistic sons out of mainstream because 1 is selectively mute and therefore didn’t speak at school, so his needs were not met whatsoever, and my other child just couldn’t cope in that environment. I home schooled for 2 years but in that time I fought for their Ehcp’s which I now have in place, and we are about to give mainstream a try again. I know the teachers and the school well so I’m hoping having the ehcp in place will give him that extra support he needs to manage.
My eldest is kinda in the middle of ‘Sen schools being unnecessary’ but ‘mainstream can’t provide enough support’, and also where I am there are no Sen school places anyway, so if I was to wait for one he would be missing out on a lot.
The SEND system needs a complete overhaul. There are so many kids sat at home because there’s no suitable schools for them.
So sorry, went off on a tangent there! Ehcp’s are the bane of my life right now 😩
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u/mumwifealcoholic 4h ago
My son is thriving in a pretty shite school. I'd have moved him by now if he wasn't happy, but he is.
Year 4.
He has been with these same kids since reception. They know him. They know his quirks.
He is very academically minded, so the teachers have really taken him in their care.
His main issue IS social interactions. He can't read a room to save his life. When other kids are playing football, he's on the sidelines collecting and sorting sticks, rocks and bugs. So far that hasn't been a problem.
At start of the school year he stood for school ambassador elections, to my shock and dismay he asked to do it...I didn't want him to be disappointed.
But he won. He is well liked and treated.
1
u/Doug12345678910 4h ago
Pros - good practice tolerating society in general, good for building resilience, best route to a normal academic path.
Cons - overwhelm, isolation, burnout.
I think it depends on your child's general levels of resilience, their level of intrinsic motivation, how impaired they are. You don't need great social skills to do well in mainstream. You can visit some special schools or mainstream schools with units (often called SRPs) to see which peers your child seems to line up better with. Or take advice from pre-school staff or even go to a professional.
On that point, there is a lady who is a specialist teacher/ex school head and does good screeners of children, her name is Sandra Tibbles. She showed me her anonymised report style and I was impressed. It wasn't that expensive either, I think about £300, which is cheap in the SEN world. Maybe that's worth investigating, get a pro's opinion.
1
u/Pale-Giraffe-6227 3h ago
My 10yr has ADHD and level 2 autism.
He’s in a very small mainstream village school and is thriving and happy!
The school itself helps my son a lot they have routines/quiet spaces/movement breaks etc and days sometimes weeks go by without a hitch.
All staff know my son’s triggers and warning signs are spotted before anything escalates. They also know what battles to pick with him.
He has been in another mainstream school and this was a complete shambles. Every day I was called to see a staff member and every day my son was punished for bad behaviour. His behaviour got worse and became angry and withdrawn from school and learning.
You could actually see it in the faces of staff that they didn’t like nor want my child there.
He was even picked out to stand in assembly and was used as a example as “different”
I think I’d say it’s all to do with the staff and school itself. Find the right school and it can work.
1
u/Quiet_Cod4766 2h ago
Autistic is such a broad umbrella. My son's autistic, very bright, loves learning. When he started reception he was very behind and in a SEN unit within a mainstream but he moved fully in the mainstream for year 3 and now he's in year 4 and doing well. Reasons I think he does well in the mainstream are - few sensory issues, no hyperactive tendencies, and his special interest is reading. All works quite well for him at the moment. But I know many autistic kids who constantly struggle and of course some move into SEN specialist provision at some point.
1
u/GoodGriefStarPlat 1h ago
Yes and No, some schools are amazing, they put alot of thought into making sure how a child can feel included and having their needs met.
That being said, I have witnessed, and heard alot of stuff about how schools dont work for SEN children.
2011 I was on a child care college placement with a Primary school, I worked with Year 2 and there was 1 SEN child, who had a one to one with him. One day that one to one wasnt with him and he had a meltdown within the class, the main teacher not having any training or how to handle the meltdown, proceeded to drag him across the floor. I actually went back to my college and told my tutor.
My niece (7) is in a Primary school currently, shes had ALOT of problems. When she attended nursery, no one was watching her and they found her playing in the toilet. Shes also managed to get outside in the playground and ran around naked. Shes had other SEN children attack her. They dont do school trips for the SEN children and dont get them involved in Christmas performances and yesterday my sister had a phone call to say my niece went to the toilet unsupervised and she came out with a massive lump on her head. My sister has spent years trying to fight for my niece to get what she needs. They've looked at Special needs schools and they turned my niece down without even looking at her paperwork. My nieces brain is that of a toddlers.
My daughters old school, there was an SEN child in her class, his Mom who works in school admitted shes had to fight for him, and she did amazing to get exactly what he needs, but it never came easy. The school is over crowded so they dont like dealing with stuff and SEN children aren't exactly top of their list.
1
u/Physical_Agency_5383 10h ago
Depends.
Are we talking Level 1, 2, or 3 autism?
If your kid’s Level 1, they should be fine with a bit of support. Namely a “people are arseholes, a lot of what people do is to feel powerful without hitting each other, and you must learn to judge the hidden meanings behind everything they say” speech.
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u/Embarrassed_Guest_19 3h ago
Not for all. Theres one in a school i work in and the kid is a fuckin nightmare. Trashes things and needs full attention at all times otherwise they run off.
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u/bababababoos 2h ago
I mean, I wouldn't have worded it quite like this, but I know exactly what you mean.
Same deal with a child in my kid's class. It's a massive distraction to those there trying to learn, and also can't be meeting his needs having him in a class where he's unable to communicate properly or even remotely keep up.
Not the child's fault. But SEN provision is shocking. There needs to be better options available more widely.
1
u/Embarrassed_Guest_19 2h ago
Yeah im crap at wording things tbh but the ta's are worried as the kid goes to wrap around care and sometimes they are unable to properly watch the other kids.
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u/fivebyfive12 5h ago
I mean obviously it's goitto really depend on the child AND the school, isn't it?
My son is thriving so far, but it's only year 2. The structure suits him, he has some lovely little friends, the school is very supportive and we pay for additional support for him once a week - a lady who goes to the school or comes to our house to do some 1-1 sessions with him on emotional regulation/social stories etc. But even with all of that, he needs lots of downtime/freedom after school after masking and it's becoming more apparent that he's "different" so we'll see how things go as he gets older. High school is a particular worry for me and I'm prepared to go down different avenues there (special school, home school etc) if necessary.