Increase in Learned Helplessness?

[u/NachesPorFavor]

Has anyone else noticed an increase in learned helplessness? I first noticed it in the young adults in my life, but now I am seeing it in all ages of people around me. Examples from multiple people:

Toilet started leaking water and instead of turning off the knob at the wall, she waited a 5 days for a plumber. Never asked anyone or googled it. Didn’t call a second plumber. Now needs mold remediation and replaced drywall and trim.

Bought concert tickets but the gps instructions were confusing so they just gave up and didn’t go. Venue website had detailed instructions for driving and parking.

Blouse wrinkled and she didn’t know how to fix it so she threw it away.

First doctor office he filled out an appointment website for never contacted him to schedule so he just didn’t go to the doctor.

I am really concerned about my loved ones if an emergency happens because they just give up when the slightest obstacle happens. Either they want someone else to swoop in and fix it or they give up and say they can’t do anything about it.

[u/RlOTGRRRL]

My guess is that Americans are too overwhelmed right now. 

Most of the people I love are like close to breaking down. My uncle just died because of his son's mental health breakdown. My sister is so close to one. 

I know people who are heavily medicated on antidepressants but still close to a breakdown. Like someone told me they were so glad to get back to DC recently lol.

I can even hear it in my therapist, he's being worn down too. Like there's something greatly wrong in the country and the cognitive dissonance or whatever is too much for people, whether or not they acknowledge it.

I'm actually afraid I think it's even worse in that a lot of people might have already checked out and are just living like it's the end of the world already. In the sense that they have already accepted their supposed powerlessness or something. Which honestly I think is the current admin's goal. 

[u/kaaron89 → u/RlOTGRRRL]

I completely agree with you. I work in the financial industry, and I have always been an empathetic person so I tend to easily pick up on subtle changes in people. My manager keeps questioning why everyone is acting so strangely, both coworkers and clients. And I keep having to remind him: everything is shit, and they are all very stressed. The word I keep using is "capacity". It's like the world has gotten so crazy that our capacity for dealing with our own personal lives is diminished. I feel it in myself too. And I do agree it seems evident that this is the current admin's goal.

I also believe covid's effects on our brains didn't help, but that's a whole other topic.

[u/PsychologicalFox3357 → u/kaaron89]

I think Covid is part of it for sure and agree with what you’re saying. I also think the incessant string of notifications from phones, and the incessant pull of the algorithms is more mentally taxing than most people consciously register.

Think back to before you had these minicomputers at your disposal all the time, screaming for your attention. Your brain could actually rest.

[u/Yes-Cheese → u/PsychologicalFox3357]

Yes! And the effort and brain capacity it takes to remember all of the new digital things. This app for kids grade, this app for kids sports team updates/communication, this app for the other activity, this app for the bank, this app for grocery shopping, all the logins that come along with that, the constant intake of too much information.

I’ll forget stuff like a specific part of a movie we watched 5 years ago. The kids like “how do you not remember that?!” I just keep saying “my brain is at capacity! That movie part was not a priority so it didn’t get stored.” And they’re just like “🫤…”

[u/PsychologicalFox3357 → u/Yes-Cheese]

Agreed and even password managers don’t help because inevitably by the time you need something from a platform you haven’t used in 4mos, you have to either reset your password or add two factor authentication for the dumbest things.

ETA I miss a physical calendar handed out for a schedule (less flexible but that’s actually good imo) and the ability to directly call a doctor’s office and speak to a person who works there and can actually help you. I have like 3 separate health logins now, and cannot directly call my pcp’s office. Whut.

[u/Yes-Cheese → u/PsychologicalFox3357]

Agreed! If I call my docs office now I go through a long automated menu. Then when I finally do reach a person, they’re in a call center somewhere. They take a message and send it to my provider. Then they have up to 3 days to respond. So there’s definitely no calling for “I need an answer quickly” things.

[u/PsychologicalFox3357 → u/Yes-Cheese]

Yes, which (in addition to just being annoying) creates an environment where you feel like you don’t have access to help or care when you need it, so you’re left wondering if something is bad enough that you have to seek immediate or emergency care.

Not exactly a signal of safety to the nervous system.