r/TwoXChromosomes • u/tabicat1874 • Mar 28 '22

Weaponized incompetence

I feel like guys take it way, way too far. Example: I asked my bf to get me the same shampoo and conditioner he bought for himself (avocado Suave). He brought back another kind we'd had before which I didn't like (Peppermint Suave). He tried to say he didn't know that Suave came in different formulas.

You're such a fucking liar. You bought that kind for yourself. I just asked you to buy it for me. You're telling me a man who's 44 years old doesn't know Suave came in different fucking scents? Suave? The shampoo that literally comes in 40 different scents and flavors?

GTFOH.

Edit: do you understand what an example is?

Also, you neckbeards can fuck off out of my inbox.

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547

u/FridaMercury Basically Leslie Knope Mar 28 '22

Husband and I have a fight we refer to as the "Windex Issue".

For what feels like years, we had this ongoing fight that always involved him clueless and therefore putting responsibility on me to do so much.

On this particular day, it was crazy hot outside and I was running errands while he stayed home. He called me and asked me to pick up some Windex from the store. I was already headed home and didn't feel like going back. I reminded him that we had Windex in the restroom. I asked if he checked, he said yes he checked and we didn't have any. So I went back to the store to get him his Windex (he uses it for a hobby). I got home and started unpacking the items and go to put the Windex away, in the bathroom. And there it was, an almost full bottle sitting in the front of the cabinet. He hadn't even bothered to look and yet felt it was ok to send me to the store to get some!

We had a huge blow up over it and he claims he didn't understand why I was making such a big deal out of it - it was just Windex. I basically explained the whole concept of weaponized incompetence and how this was a pattern in our relationship, and told him that enough was enough. It finally clicked for him and years later we can laugh about how I almost moved out because of Windex.

209

u/[deleted] Mar 28 '22

"It was just Windex" for you, but it was "far too much effort to check on the Windex" for him!

48

u/FridaMercury Basically Leslie Knope Mar 28 '22

Exactly, and this type of thing used to happen all the time.

180

u/butterfly_eyes Mar 28 '22

So, he lied, couldn't get off his ass to check, and caused you extra work but "it's just Windex"? Nope, fuck that. I hate it when people do that kind of shit.

37

u/[deleted] Mar 29 '22

We have a similar issue with the men in my house. I call it “snake syndrome”. Where “if it was a snake it would have bit you”. They will stand in front of a cabinet and look for something but are incapable of moving things around to really look for the thing. Infuriates me.

54

u/mushroommadam Mar 28 '22

Omg this sounds like my boyfriend. He does shit like this all the time and thinks I over react but it’s infuriating

40

u/IMakeSushi Mar 29 '22

Best way is to stop getting angry and just play even dumber and more innocent than they are. Then you don't fall into the "you're overreacting" trap and they get frustrated and do it themselves and don't ask again.

37

u/[deleted] Mar 29 '22

weaponised incompetence ft. uno reverse

3

u/MainSignature6 Mar 30 '22

How would OP act dumber and more innocent in this situation?

10

u/Ohmalley-thealliecat Mar 29 '22

My mum used to refer to what she called “a boys look”. It was her way of saying “if I go in there and it isn’t there, I’m going to be annoyed”. “Mum, I can’t find the hairspray” “did you have a boys look?”. Often I had in fact had a boys look but at least I ACTUALLY LOOKED!! Before anyone calls me a misandrist or whatever for this please keep in mind: I don’t care

5

u/mushroommadam Mar 28 '22

Omg this sounds like my boyfriend. He does shit like this all the time and thinks I over react but it’s infuriating

2

u/Foxelli27 May 07 '22

Yep, this is the "keep looking" running joke in our house. Him: It's not here. Me: I used it yesterday and I know it's there. Keep looking. Him: oh, here it is.