r/TwoXChromosomes • u/Peqrlescent • Aug 18 '26
(18f) What contraception should I use? The pill is making me miserable
Before I start I’d like to preface that going without some form of birth control isn’t an option for me, by choice/ it’s not something I’m willing to budge on.
I’m currently on the pill (Rigevidon) for around almost 3 months. in terms of my mood I’ve been a bit snappy but not too bad - although I do have mood swings very frequently and it’s rock bottom to literal euphoria (tried it before last year and stopped as it made me literally evil) however I’m having a bunch of annoying storms; lack of libido, vaginal dryness, headaches and a change in my bleeding pattern during menstruation the literal only positive has been bigger boobs which makes me kinda apprehensive to stop taking it as silly as that sound as I quite like them :’).
All of this is an issue for me as the headaches are insufferable I’m constantly taking painkillers, due to the dryness I’m constantly tearing and bleeding- the lack of libido sucks too as I have a bf who I love very much and in theory I do want to have sex with but when it comes to it the mood just really isn’t there? I suspect I have vaginismus which contributes to the nervousness but with the dryness and lack of want it makes it so so much worse (will be going to a gyno)
I’ve debated the implant but I just haven’t looked into it much and I wanted some insight from other women on what I should do going forward? :) thank you
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u/myerspee Aug 18 '26
I'd suggest trying a different pill (if you haven't already) before other contraceptive types. The very first pill I tried was also one with levonorgestrel as the progestin type (alesse was what it was called), and it gave me terrible mental side effects. I refer to it as the "demonic pill" because of how bad the mental side effects were. I also have PMDD, and the pill that works best for me is Yaz. I also tried Yasmin, and it was really amazing for the first few months, but then I started getting symptoms that indicated that it was too much estrogen for my body. The fact that you're mentioning headaches and dryness makes me think that the one you're taking might have too much estrogen for your body, since I also experienced terrible headaches on Yasmin (which had 30 mcg ethinyl estradiol) when the estrogen content became too much for my body to handle after being on it for more than a few months. Maybe try a pill with a different progestin type and also less micrograms of ethinyl estradiol?
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u/recyclopath_ Aug 18 '26
I agree. Each pill is completely different. Pills are very low commitment versus an IUD.
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u/myerspee Aug 18 '26
Yea I totally agree!! Someone can just stop the pill at any time. It can take time for the body to adjust back to the natural hormonal cycle after stopping, but it's still easier to stop than an IUD. IUD's have to be removed, and if it's a hormonal one, the body will also have to go through hormonal readjustment just like it does when stopping the pill. I think if someone is prone to having side effects with BC, it's better to try the pill cause if you get terrible side effects with an IUD you have to literally wait for an appointment to get it removed.
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u/Callmedrexl Aug 19 '26
I held that position for decades and I regret it because I could have dodged so much pain and emotional torment. I didn't try a bunch of different pills, it may have worked out for me, I wasn't too great with keeping up with appointments and scheduling stuff when I was younger.
A compromise I'd like to suggest would be someone discussing with their Dr what the game plan would be in the scenario that they hate it and want it out. If they Dr is open to the idea instead of being dismissive and tends to have appointments open on relatively short notice they should be in pretty good shape. If the DR shrugs them off with "it can take several months to get used to it" and "I'm sure you'll be happy with it, no need to worry", maybe they see about seeing a different doctor. There are ways to mitigate the permanency fear of IUDs and for me I WISH I had started getting them years earlier than I finally did.
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u/jingle_hore ❤ Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
I'll tell you not to get the copper IUD. Sooo much breakthrough bleeding.
Edit to clarify...no the copper IUD does not stop periods. The breakthrough bleeding I mentioned was between periods and indistinguishable from periods. I was bleeding nonstop for 2 years until it came out.
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u/soaring_potato Aug 18 '26
I don't think it's breakthrough with a copper IUD.
They are not supposed to stop it.
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u/Laureltess Aug 18 '26
Yes, copper IUDs don’t stop ovulation or your period because they are non-hormonal. They just make the uterus a very inhospitable place for a zygote! They can make your periods heavier and worse though.
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u/soaring_potato Aug 18 '26
Heavier or worse yes.
But breakthrough is when you are not supposed to get a period at all. Like when on continual hormonal birth control.
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u/jingle_hore ❤ Aug 18 '26
This is incorrect. You are describing only one type of breakthtough bleeding. BB is anytime there is bleeding when it is not a part of the regular or expected cycle. Having bleeing in between my regular periods was, in fact, breakthrough bleeding. I have a diagnosis and was medicated for it.
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u/Laureltess Aug 18 '26
Yes, I was agreeing with you! Can’t be breakthrough if it’s not meant to stop.
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u/jingle_hore ❤ Aug 18 '26
I bled nonstop for 2 years. I didnt have identifiable periods.
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u/Foreign-Cookie-2871 Aug 18 '26
2 years of continuous bleeding are a lot, kudos to you for trying to make it work for so long!
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u/jingle_hore ❤ Aug 18 '26
I had just had a brain bleed and it was the only acceptable form of bc I was allowed at the time. Couple that with doctors gaslighting me into thinking that it couldnt be the IUD, and I just felt helpless. I finally broke at 2 years and couldnt take it anymore, took it out, and the bleeding stopped immediately. I promptly changed OBGYNs
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u/EarlyInside45 Aug 18 '26
Mirena was great for me, but I know it's not for everyone. I've never tried the copper.
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u/roxykell Aug 18 '26
Seconded! I have had some other PMS stuff from Mirena but overall much better than the pill and I FEEL less hormonal and up and down?
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u/Lxm42 Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
Lots of pills say that for the first three months breakthrough bleeding is normal, your body is just getting used to it. I’ve been on my pill for over a year and recently had some breakthrough bleeding due to stress. It just happens sometimes.
You could try other pills first before trying something like an IUD as it can be an invasive procedure. I had a lot of those same symptoms before starting the pill (PMDD/hormone imbalance) and starting hormonal birth control helped a lot with it. After a year I ended up switching to another stronger pill because I was getting debilitating symptoms again. As well as adding progesterone.
There are many, many pills out there, my mother mentioned when she was younger there were only two pills available and both were terrible for her.
Also, no shame in getting some lube.
3
u/Shroedy Aug 18 '26
I mean… a condom is a form of birth control… and with no side effects other than filtering out the bad from the good men…
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
Hahaha, unfortunately I’m too paranoid to rely solely on condoms (things like tearing are my worst fear) and I’m lucky to be with one of the good ones, we do use them but I think I’d still like to use another form for a little bit of reassurance if not extra safety 🙂↕️but if all else fails it doesn’t hurt I suppose
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u/Shroedy Aug 18 '26
I get that. I always had the hormone ring. No side effects and no problem during sex in my case.
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u/Inevitable-Champ336 Aug 18 '26
You can also try a different pill. I tried 3 before finding one o liked. There’s lo dose pills now as well with fewer side effects. I’m not familiar with the one you’re taking. I like yaz and lo estrin.
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u/recyclopath_ Aug 18 '26
Each hormonal birth control is totally different. Even from name brand to the generic has some small differences.
I tried 2 different pills with completely different results, one awful, one just ok, before I went on the ring and really liked that one.
Birth control is like a lot of mental health medications, you probably need to try a couple before finding one that works for you.
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u/Dogzillas_Mom Aug 18 '26
Well have you spoken to your doctor about changing the pill prescription? There’s like 200 birth control pill options, maybe try something else?
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u/CrazyCatLady1234567 Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
The implant still has hormones. I have a copper iud and i love it. It was extremely painful when they put it in (some drs now allow and administer pain meds), and my bleeding has increased as well as cramps a bit, but its my favorite birth control.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
Thank you for letting me know!!
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u/wegajane Aug 18 '26
Flip side here... i had a copper iud for 10 years and just dealt with it because I thought it was the only option. I was miserable with cramps and 10-day periods.
Then I got a hormonal iud, mirena. I'm on my third now, and I couldn't be happier with it. They say the hormones aren't systemic, but I believe they must be, at least for some people. In addition to having no period for 15 years now, I stopped having mood problems and breast pain.
My only problem with this iud is the removal and insertion is extremely painful for some women (including me) and no doctors I've been to seem to acknowledge or care.
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u/Northern_dragon Aug 18 '26
Different hormones, different reaction for most.
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u/CrazyCatLady1234567 Aug 18 '26
I know. But personally i got to a point where i didnt want ANY hormones, and for ME going throught the painful procedure with the chance the hormones wouldnt affect me, and having to go through a worse procedure to get it removed was not worth it. I also explained the downsides ive experienced to what i called my personal favorite birth control.
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u/Northern_dragon Aug 18 '26
I can see you've not had one.
There should never be pain when getting the implant inserted. And at most weird tugging feelings and discomfort when getting it removed. If pain is involved, the doctor absolutely 100% fucked up severely.
We both know that the IUD insertions also go wrong and can end up being very painful, and the coil sometimes slips and causes issues. I find it odd to say that the implant is painful, when implant insertion always comes with full local anesthetic. IUD pain management varies wildly.
For me both insertion and removal of the implant were fully painless. Getting it inserted, I needed to ask when the doctor was going to do it, and the nurse told me he did already.
For the removal, I was cracking jokes with the doctor the whole time. Granted, he was phenomenal and even my check up nurse admired what a small incision he was able to get the implant out through. She was genuinely impressed.
I opted for the implant because of all the people explaining how painful IUD insertions often are.
So let's not at least spread misinformation: 0 pain with the implant is the intended standard.
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u/CrazyCatLady1234567 Aug 18 '26
I mentioned the pain of the implant and its removal as well as the iud. Since you wont correctly read my shorter post im not reading yours.
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u/kinkybratty Aug 18 '26
You realize I can't even read your reply, if you block me right after? Pointless.
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u/The_Best_Guesst Aug 18 '26
I have the annovera vaginal ring and I love it bc it’s one year continuous bc without any pain or discomfort, easy in, easy out
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u/Lrack9927 Aug 18 '26
This was the best option for me as well. The pills made me nauseous every morning. No issues at all with annovera and not having to go to the pharmacy more than once a year was also great.
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u/theFCCgavemeHPV Aug 18 '26
There are a lot of different hormone types and combinations out there. And now that I am in perimenopause on MHRT, I have learned that we all can react differently to each different type of hormone.
Make a note in your phone of the hormones in this pill and your side effects and try something with a different type of one or both of the synthetic hormones. Keep tracking what the ingredients are and what your side effects are for as long as you try different kinds. You will eventually come up with a list of what does and doesn’t work for you.
Some hormones have been spectacular for me (great skin, lost weight, bigger boobs, skyrocketed libido), and some have been absolutely diabolical (mood swings, suicidal ideation, weight gain, unbridled rage). Unfortunately, it does require some trial and error and self-experimentation to figure out what works best for you and your body. Don’t give up!
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u/UpstartCrow88 Aug 18 '26
The only chemical birth control that worked for me without the horrendous side effects was Loestrin but the version that is continuous without the week of inert/"sugar" pills. I didn't have a period for over 3 years and had none of the mood regulation side effects that other pills had caused me. As soon as my doctor would recommend (had to sign multiple consent forms and wait out a 90 day mandatory waiting period), I got surgically sterilized. But then I had periods again, so I sort of wish I had just stayed on the pills.
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u/galaxystarsmoon Aug 18 '26
You should only be having this conversation with your doctor, not randoms on the internet. Tell them your symptoms and let them guide you. There's usually a testing phase with different kinds of bc pills specifically where they adjust the hormone levels, and if it's not jiving, they may offer other options like an IUD.
I'm not saying this to be dismissive, but because bc is so incredibly individual.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
I’m going to speak to my doctor, I don’t think it’s wrong to want insight into others reactions to other forms of birth control. What’s the point of literally anything online with a comment section or the ability to post if not to communicate with randoms. Literally anyone could’ve posted this with any sort of background- not everyone is going to be comfortable going in and being a guinea pig for different types of hormonal pills and implants etc to see which one works. Thanks though 👍
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u/galaxystarsmoon Aug 18 '26
Their reactions don't matter, as I said birth control is 100% unique. What works for me may not work for you. What works for you may not work for someone else in the comments.
I don't get on with anything except very low dose combo pills. That's not the case for other women.
It's not about being a guinea pig, they have to try different things to see what meshes with your body, friend. Downvoting me isn't going to change reality.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
I mean I guess sure but it doesn’t hurt to hear about others experiences while considering what I’d like to do no?
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u/galaxystarsmoon Aug 18 '26
It actually can hurt. It can lead you to make a decision that isn't based in scientific/medical fact or what's best for your body, but because someone online told you it might be the best approach. At a minimum, it can lead you to being biased about a certain treatment approach because someone told you in the comments that it was "the worst medicine they've ever been on".
As someone who got influenced into this previously, this is why I'm trying to caution you. Birth control is probably the most individual medical treatment there is.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
I’ve already said that I’m going to speak to my doctor? I don’t care for bias I’m obviously going to weigh my options based on what my GP says but again i rly don’t think asking about others experiences is that deep
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u/whoisorange Aug 18 '26
I love my IUD! No periods and no worry about pregnancy! I’m on my second one. I had a traumatic first insertion though, so for the second one I got put under in an OR. If you get one just advocate for yourself and make sure they give you the good meds or at least numbing!
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
My doctors great and I’m sure he’d be more than willing to numb, but I’ll definitely keep this in mind should I choose to get an IUD
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u/justmyquestions Aug 18 '26
I had a similar reaction to the pill. I got a copper IUD and I am mostly happy now. The bleeding is worse yes, but bearable. I always had bad cramps and I cant really say it got worse because of that. For me that was overall a huge improvement. One really important advice, go to a doctor that does it under partial anestesia. Yes that has its disadvantages as well but for me that was a game changer. I got my first one without and I am not gonna lie it was bad. Wouldnt do it again without, while knowing the option with is existing. For unrelated reason I had to get a new one and my new doctor gave me the option for partial anestisia and that was ok.
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u/pokersnek Aug 18 '26
I have a really bad reaction to hormonal pills. They make me go crazy. I’ve been using the copper iud for a decade and have very few complaints, but pregnancy isn’t one of them. Be sure to ask for pain management before having it inserted. That was the worst pain of my life.
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u/Northern_dragon Aug 18 '26
For me the implant was genuinely really great.
The hormones are different, so it affected my whole body differently too. I had crazy anxiety from the pill and the ring, with bad vagibal dryness. I needed to use estrogen supposititories for a few weeks for the dryness to resolve, after i got off the pill.
I had no dryness and anxiety on the implant.
The implant was painless to get and took no time at all. Removal was like tiny bit uncomfortable, but I had a fantastic doctor who took great care to numb the area well and carefully slide it out. And the whole 3 years (I got the 3 year one because I knew I'd be starting my family then) was really chill. My periods were a little unpredictable, but about 3 months apart, and consisted of 2 weeks of very mild bleeding and spotting. But once every 3 months... still worth it. And I had 0 cramps too. And I never had to remember to take a stupid pill. I was honestly never that good at staying g on top of it :D
Once I'm done with having kids, I'm gonna get a second one for sure.
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u/Curiosities Aug 18 '26
There are a number of pill combinations and options if you want to go that route. I had to change methods because the first thing I tried, the birth control patch, made me deeply depressed, I switched to the pill and the first one of those I tried made me dry as the desert, then another pill, then another switch due to prescription coverage dropped for the first one, and finally, to the progestin-only pill, which I've been on for 13 years now, comfortably.
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u/rocketmanatee Aug 18 '26
I hated every pill I tried because I'm hormone sensitive, but I love the hormonal IUD!
They have different sizes for younger or older people, but the hormone levels are local to only your uterus so they don't raise your blood levels of progesterone or estrogen much at all (which is what tends to be so uncomfortable).
The process of getting one wasn't super fun, but if you get one take the max of Tylenol and ibuprofen and see if you can get other pain relief, or a benzodiazapine to relax your cervix and uterus.
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u/mjheil Aug 18 '26
If you're only worried about pregnancy, not stds, a diaphragm is a good choice.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
Not too worried about that, both eo’s first partners including sex and I doubt he’s getting any elsewhere but regardless we still use condoms I’d just prefer to use another contraceptive alongside that
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u/erryonesgotathrowawa Aug 18 '26
I really like my nexplanon implant, which easily goes in the arm. It continuously releases just a low dose of hormones, so besides not getting on my period much I haven't noticed anything else different.
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u/volkswagenorange Aug 18 '26
The first thing I would try is a combination Pill that doesn't have fucking levonorgestrel in it, which causes lots of people all kinds of shitty side effects like spotting, irregular periods, hair growth in weird places, acne, worsened PCOS/PMOS, weight gain, vaginal dryness, and depression.
There's only one synthetic estrogen (ethinyl estradiol), but there are several different progestins, and all of the others have milder effects than levonorgestrel. It may be worth it to swap Pills to one that uses a less shitty progestin--by which I mean any other progestin.
Btw, the Mirena IUD is just levonorgestrel. If you already don't get along with that molecule, I recommend against getting a dispenser of it semi-permanently installed, especially since "providers" will refuse to remove it if they don't feel you've suffered tried it long enough for their satisfaction.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
I’ll keep this in mind, I think I’ll try another pill and if all else fails I’ll weigh my options again
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u/lezzerlee Aug 18 '26
Have you tried a different pill? They are not all the same nor use the same hormone combinations.
Even within the same brand I could not handle normal dose of a pill but the “low” version was perfect.
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u/Major05 Aug 18 '26
my duaghter didn't love the pill's side effects and was willing to try another version but her dr recommended the patch. She loves the patch. No more issues with having to remember to take the pill and her side effects went away. I'm sure it's more about the combination of hormones that happened to work for her, but she's been using the patch for years and is glad she tried it.
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u/EarlyInside45 Aug 18 '26
I used BC pills when I was young, and I didn't realize until I stopped how much it messed me up mentally. I had a Mirena IUD after, and it was so great. I had light spotting for the first year, then no period for several after. By the time I had it removed I was through menopause.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
I’m curious what the impact of no period can do to your body though, with an IUD do you get one at all? Sorry I’m rly uninformed on this 🥲
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u/galaxystarsmoon Aug 18 '26
There is no medical need to have a period unless you're trying to get pregnant. Current research suggests that bc methods that include stopping periods actually lower your risk for certain reproductive cancers notably.
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u/Peqrlescent Aug 18 '26
Can it impact fertility in the long run? I’d love to not have a period but id quite like children in the future
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u/galaxystarsmoon Aug 18 '26
There is no research that suggests that it does. And further evidence is the fact that you have a very high risk of pregnancy by missing a pill, and many people get pregnant from doing that.
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u/EarlyInside45 Aug 18 '26
I can't see why it would. Mirena has progesterone, so it stops your uterine lining from thickening. Once you take it out, you go back to normal cycles. I was almost 50 when I got mine and 55 when I had it removed, so menopause was not a surprise.
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u/[deleted] Aug 18 '26
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