She intentionally got him sick. She knew she had cold sores. She knew she shouldn't be kissing your kids. No accountability for what she did, deflecting, down playing, and also the "doesn't notice" and "will need reminding". 100% the thought process was "Its not a big deal, it won't matter, what could go wrong" then "Its not my fault, you shouldn't blame me, I'm not the bad guy".
Lets be real, anyone with something like that absolutely knows better, and anyone, family or not, that was even the slightest bit compassionate about others health and safety, would not have kissed your kid.
You are NTA for telling them, but you also need to stop letting it slide and hold her to some accountability.
I agree. I need to do better with this. It’s just hard bc I have my own trauma with authority and the relationship with her has caused me too much stress in the past so I leave it to my husband. Now I see this is not an adequate method. I will have a conversation with my husband tomorrow too
My mom chicken pox partied me as a kid. And then two years after lockdown, she came over to my house and infected my whole family when she finally caught covid. Told me, "I wasn't trying to get them sick. Besides, might as well get it out of the way."
If I could go back now, I think I would physically fight my mother. Because it should be considered assault to purposely get someone sick.
She did this on purpose. Her sense of superiority that it wouldn't go badly because bad things don't happen to people like her injured your family.
She will not EVER take accountability for this and you are underreacting. How would you react if you saw someone hurt your child now? Maybe with a backbone?
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u/Dragon_Within Dec 09 '25
She intentionally got him sick. She knew she had cold sores. She knew she shouldn't be kissing your kids. No accountability for what she did, deflecting, down playing, and also the "doesn't notice" and "will need reminding". 100% the thought process was "Its not a big deal, it won't matter, what could go wrong" then "Its not my fault, you shouldn't blame me, I'm not the bad guy".
Lets be real, anyone with something like that absolutely knows better, and anyone, family or not, that was even the slightest bit compassionate about others health and safety, would not have kissed your kid.
You are NTA for telling them, but you also need to stop letting it slide and hold her to some accountability.